How to get others to respect you?

You can’t get others to respect you if you don’t first have a clear idea of ​​what respect is. Nor will we aspire to this psychological competence if we do not achieve, first of all, respect ourselves, cultivate self-love and good self-esteem. Few “muscles” of emotional well-being are so essential when it comes to caring on a daily basis.

On the other hand, there is an aspect that we cannot neglect. We must be awake when it comes to perceiving what words and what behaviors are aimed at belittling us. Being sensitive to everyday disrespect is also essential. . As is any action aimed at rejecting, denying or canceling what another thinks or feels.

You cannot get others to respect you if you first We take the step to strengthen a series of basic values ​​within our personal development. This means that you must perceive yourself as equal to others, in terms of value. In other words, don’t feel more or less than anyone else. Also, of course, accept you. Feel that you are worth as you are and for what you are.

The three dimensions to make others respect you

Acceptance and self-esteem are expressed through attitudes and actions. They are not an abstract reality nor do you have to say it so others know that that is what you feel. Whoever respects himself has three qualities: self-esteem assertiveness and authenticity.

Self-esteem

Self-esteem, if we want to define it simply, is having a good opinion. of oneself. It has very little to do with narcissism. It is simply about “being liked”. Feel sympathy for what you think, say and do, without that meaning thinking that you are better than others.

As special as only you are and as equal as any human being is. Likewise, well-known therapists such as Albert Ellis already pointed out that self-esteem is the cause of many of our “psychological illnesses.” The reason? We often neglect it. We forget that it is an unconditional dimension for our well-being.

Assertiveness

assertiveness for its part, has to do with being able to defend your rights and express your opinions. It is especially important when we are surrounded by an unfavorable context, in which we think the opposite of what the majority or the authority figure thinks. On the other hand, this attribute is a direct child of self-esteem and a necessary condition to make others respect you.

Likewise, studies such as those carried out at Stony Brook University by Dr. Britanni Speed, It tells us that training and enabling ourselves in this dimension boosts our well-being, personal security, and self-respect.

Authenticity

Besides, Authenticity refers to maintaining our essence, values ​​and beliefs, even if selfishly it is not the best for us in that situation. That is, expressing what you think and what you feel in any context. Do not simulate or misrepresent yourself to make a certain impression. Act spontaneously. Think that you can only be authentic if you are aware of your value as a person.

Get respect from others

Respect begins at home. Therefore, you won’t get others to respect you if you don’t do it yourself. On the other hand, she understands that respect does not mean fear or reverence, but acceptance and appreciation. This is undoubtedly a topic that has not only been present in the psychological field.

Studies like those carried out by the doctor Elizabeth Telfer and published in the magazine The Philosophical Quarterly tell us that this has been an aspect of great relevance in almost any field and scenario. Human respect begins above all with oneself, cultivating adequate values ​​and worth.
There are some keys to getting others to respect you.. These are some of them:

Accept that other people don’t always have to like you.. The approval or disapproval of others does not have to condition you. There will always be people who don’t like you.Learn to differentiate kindness from condescension. Courtesy is not submission. We did not come into the world to make others feel good.Strengthen and practice self-love. Don’t stop recognizing all your values ​​and your successes. Never overlook your achievements, no matter how small they may seem.Introduce “no” into the dictionary of your communication. Setting limits does not mean offending others or being inconsiderate. It is a healthy way to preserve mutual respect.Recognize that you are not responsible for what others feel or think.. If the way you think, how you speak or how you act worries or bothers another, it is not your problem. Let that person be the one to resolve your disagreement.Demand recognition when necessary. If you do too much for others, they usually stop appreciating it. If this happens, suspend the collaboration.Learn to defend yourself. Perhaps you are a victim of “learned helplessness.” So, it’s time to get over this and learn how to stand up for yourself. It is not easy at the beginning; However, once the habit is established, the effort is not so much to maintain it.

Getting others to respect you is not a short-term goal, especially if you have already disrespected yourself on numerous occasions. You need the firm decision to achieve it and an iron will to stick to that goal.. However, it is worth it. Lack of respect only brings greater evils and much unnecessary suffering.

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