How To Deal With Your Ex On Social Media |

When a relationship ends, there is often a question of how to deal with the ex on social media. When it comes to social networks, many benefits arise but also a sea of ​​new difficulties and reflections of behavioral patterns.

There are endless possibilities for ending contexts, including those that end well and follow friends with ease. But what about when the end is difficult, suffering and full of bruises?

Many unfollow the other or block to avoid feeling the pain when they come across a photo or memory. Others keep watching their ex-partner’s life, getting in touch – or even anonymously – when they feel the need.

In some cases, this behavior triggers suffering and self-sabotage that keeps the connection to the other in an unhealthy way. As the contexts are diverse and it is a topic of great relevance, since it affects the lives of most people, I will raise some questions here to be reflected by each one.

Why keep your ex on social media?

The first question I raise is:

Why do you want to know about your or your ex’s life?

There is no right or wrong answer. Don’t judge yourself. Just answer honestly to yourself the “why” of this question. This will already give you a clue if this is being a healthy and natural movement for you or not.

So, ask yourself:

Does following my ex on social media help or make me feel good? Is it a harmonic movement for me, for the other and for our lives? Am I respecting my ex partner’s or ex partner’s space and emotional health?

At the end of a relationship, some proximity and distance agreements are made in order to provide a healthy way to overcome such grief.

Are you respecting those boundaries, being careful with the other’s emotional space and yours?

It is necessary both to question the way we are dealing with ourselves, caring for and respecting ourselves, and with the other as well.

How has it been to respect your needs for space and the needs of others? How has it been to take care of your emotional needs and be careful with the other?

If there is discomfort in contact but, at the same time, difficulty in stopping looking at your ex on social media, I suggest a few more questions:

What do you seek, in your deepest? What part of you is looking for it? How does the result feed you? Are you being productive and healthy in your process? Is there self-sabotage or food from a victim place? Who are you giving your personal power to? How has your self-esteem and self-image been? Have you been leaving validation of who you are in the hands of others? Do you qualify from the look of others at you?

Evaluate the way you see yourself, respect yourself and take care of yourself.

What do you get for doing something that hurts you? Assess if you have any unconscious gain, even if in negative directions.

Healing is related to love and compassion. Start with yourself. Identify if there is a difficulty within you in reaching that loving place with yourself and where this difficulty comes from.

Work, then, on this original point or on discovering it. Open your heart to yourself, and then it may be possible to open your heart to the other, harmonizing this story within yourself.

We cannot change the past, but we can take care of ourselves today to transform the present.