Sex: do you really know what it means?

In addition to its meaning, the origin of a word usually also contains guidelines for its use. In the word sex, this starting point is especially important, which is why in this article we draw its birth to better understand its present.

Sex is, without a doubt, a peculiar, special word, with uses loaded with connotations of all kinds.. Always at the top of internet searches or countless bar conversations, sex is a much talked about and at the same time silenced topic, very popular and very ignored.

We already know that it is a polysemous word, but it is curious how this polysemy has to do with how maligned this word has been throughout history. The meanings of words change progressively. In the case of “sex”, its meanings have been mutating, as a result of events, whether of a social, political or religious nature. Qlet’s go deeper.

Where does the word sex come from?

The Athenian playwright Aristophanes (444 BC – 385 BC) is responsible for this word being found in our vocabulary. He is one of the characters we meet in The banquet, a series of dialogues written by Plato and of incalculable philosophical value. These dialogues take place in the context of a dinner in which several diners, including Socrates and Aristophanes himself, talk about love and Eros.

Aristophanes, at this dinner, talks about the famous myth of the androgyne. In this myth, beings could belong to three different categories: masculine, feminine and androgynous. Androgynous is any being that has both masculine and feminine characteristics, and that comes from Latin (androsman and ginéwoman), which would represent the union of the first two categories.

Specifically, this playwright described androgynes as “complete” beings with four arms, four legs, two faces and two different genitals. These beings were defined as round, complete and powerful. So powerful that they tried to challenge the gods. Zeus was the one who decided to punish them for such an offense. His punishment consisted of cutting these beings in half so that they would no longer be vigorous, powerful and, above all, complete.

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Once this division is made, each resulting man and woman longed for the encounter with the other party, since this way they could feel “complete” again (this is where the widespread myth of the better half comes from). While now these beings went from being “complete” to being “sectioned”, it is precisely this last word that gives rise to what we know as “sex”. Sex comes from sexareand means ‘separated’, ‘sectioned’ or ‘cut’.

What uses do we give to the word sex today?

The etymology of the word sex contrasts with the uses that we usually give it today and which are frequently summarized in three:

The “sex that is done”

This use reduces the word sex to situations of intimate encounters with another person or people. That is, phrases like “I haven’t had sex in a while” or “I had sex with a boy yesterday” associate sex with sexual relations. This use is especially frequent in the media in any news headline.

If we go even further and analyze what it means to have a sexual relationship based on the original meaning, we would talk about “between-sex” relationships (of any type). For this reason, we often talk about “erotic relationships”, since this term does describe a more specific and intimate type of relationship (it refers to Eros, which implies desire, attraction, love…).

The “sex you have”

This use refers to the genitals. And it is not a correct use because, despite what many people may still believe, genitals do not define our sex. Or put another way, genitals do not determine our sexual identity.

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It is true that the use of sex as a synonym for genitals is not as frequent as the previous use, but phrases like “shaving your sex” are still read.

The “sex that is”

This is the most correct and harmonious use of the word with respect to its origins. This expression is what gives meaning to Sexology, since it is what refers to sexual identity, to the fact that we are sexual beings, using that “sex” as a differentiator, a very powerful source of diversity.

Language builds behaviors, attitudes and mental schemes. That’s why It is important that the word sex has a use that allows us to speak with much more harmony. This way we can place each concept where it belongs, so that it allows us to describe reality in the best possible way: if there is no good description of reality, we will hardly be able to ask the right questions about it, much less obtain answers.