Narcissistic jealousy in the couple

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Narcissistic jealousy does not need solid indications to unleash itself. They are also very intense and destructive. They produce great suffering in the environment, but also in the person who experiences them.

Jealousy in the context of a couple is a complex feeling associated with passions and affections, but it They can also involve ego and power. Narcissistic jealousy is one of its many varieties; This, in particular, is characterized by its emphasis on the self.

The bond of a couple usually has no guarantee, unless there is an agreement or a specifically established interest. In most cases, this is not the case and that is why it depends on many variables, sometimes random. Hence There is always the possibility that it will end and it is not unusual for a third party to deal the final blow.

It is obvious that someone who is in love does not want to lose their partner and may eventually feel that a third party threatens the relationship. Under normal conditions, that is when jealousy appears. They are a manifestation of resistance and insecurity. However, things don’t always happen this way. Sometimes there is something more behind that feeling.

““Jealousy, like borders, appears to justify dominion over what has never been possessed.”.

-Adrián Triglia-

Narcissistic jealousy

Until now we have described a situation of “normal” and motivated jealousy. Narcissistic jealousy is something else. In these cases, what matters It is not the fear of losing someone you love, but the frustration of being displaced by a third party. There is also anger at the happiness that the couple may feel with another person.

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Who experiences narcissistic jealousy He suffers a lot, but not because of the loss of a loved one, but because of the wound to his ego.. It is often difficult for them to distinguish between one and the other. More than hurting because the other has withdrawn his affections from them, they are tormented by feeling like losers; Let’s think that, to a large extent, they approach the relationship from power.

It is clear that infidelity inflicts a narcissistic wound, especially due to the deception it usually involves. However, under normal conditions, it generates suffering that includes anger and resentment, but which can ultimately be dealt with. Either because the relationship is terminated or because dialogue and resolution are resorted to.

In narcissistic jealousy, this does not happen. Whoever experiences them will not rest until they “make the other pay” for their offense.. He will feel entitled to flog you emotionally and, sometimes, physically as well. She is not going to let him “get away with it” without having to pay a high price for it.

Loving or being loved by a narcissist

The narcissist is not a bad person per se, but someone who needs help. The bad thing is that they rarely admit it and that is why conflict resolution is complicated with someone like that. In addition to this, they confuse. Eventually they appear supportive and protective, as well as charming and vital.. In return they “only” ask for total worship.

Narcissistic jealousy is typical of people with a fundamental fracture in their ego. They experience themselves as subjects in lack, but they compensate for this by overvaluing their own. They do not realize this, but everything operates unconsciously.

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This fracture makes jealousy a hallmark of his way of being.. They do not need a third party lurking to display their suspicions and distrust. In addition, they are also jealous of their partner’s achievements and successes. They want you to always be one step below or that, at least, nothing is more important in your life than them, your partner.

provoke jealousy

Narcissistic jealousy also has another side. It is very common for people with this character structure to want to make their partner jealous.. So it’s not uncommon for them to flirt right under each other’s noses. Or that they are unfaithful and leave obvious clues to be “caught”.

By generating jealousy in your partner, you achieve something you need: making her insecure.. Likewise, mistrust, with reasons, will probably make the couple focus more attention on themselves and they love this.

It is very common for someone who feels narcissistic jealousy to provoke jealousy in the other person.. It is a typical “do what you don’t want done to you”, anticipating a possible wound to his ego. Also trying to prove, over and over again, that they have control over their partner.