33 intelligent insults to silence someone with sarcasm –

Although we have been told from a very young age that it is wrong to say cruel words to others, most cultures have a fairly extensive repertoire of creative insults specifically designed to make people feel out of touch.

If you think creative insults are a relatively modern invention, you should visit some ancient ruins of the Roman Empire. You will be surprised to see how they already had their own version of graffiti and how they already messed with each other’s mothers.

Insulting is an art that dates back to ancient times. The vast majority of them usually involve rude comments towards the closest female relatives, and as you can see, things have changed relatively little.

“Your mother” is an untouchable generic for all types of unfriendly exchanges between people.

But the great reality is that most people are already quite desensitized to the most traditional insults, so if you really want to leave someone silent and without the possibility of reply, you can apply one of the following:

Creative phrases to insult with intelligence

Telling the other “stupid” or “idiot” at this point in the game seems too soft and lacking in creativity. So better try some of these insults that only the smartest people will catch.

1.- You have such a great deficiency of gray matter that you surely float: Basically, you’re telling him that his skull is so full of air that it would serve well as a life preserver.

2.- I would insult you, but then I would have to explain the insult to you, so let’s leave it like this: There’s little point in bothering to insult someone who is short-sighted. Or if?

3.-I don’t have the time or the crayons to explain it to you: When our interlocutor has the understanding of a preschooler, we can run out of patience.

4.- What is the relationship between your parents?: This insult implies that the interlocutor has genetic mental retardation.

5.- You don’t know anything. In fact, you know less than nothing because if you knew that you knew nothing, that would be something: An insult that will leave the other person thinking for a long time.

6.- I was expecting a rational conversation, but it seems like there’s no one around to have it: No. No one rational in sight who can understand arguments.

7.- Never wear a furry sweater. People won’t know where your sweater ends and your face begins: I know. Cruel, but effective.

8.- You wouldn’t get a girlfriend even in a blind asylum: Because there are uglinesses that go beyond sight…

9.- Your best safe angle is by radio: And so we avoid the tragedy of having to see your face, right?

10.- What is your contraceptive method? Your face?: Because there is no method of birth control as effective as ugliness.

11.- When God rained beauty on his creations, why did you use an umbrella?: For those who denied the gift of beauty

12.- Did you use a mud puddle as a mirror this morning?: And you probably didn’t notice anything strange.

13.- You are the child on the poster that promoted legal abortion: Not suitable for susceptible people.

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14.- Your birth certificate is an apology letter from a condom company: Because sometimes a factory defect can result in a very upset person.

15.- I would say that you are the son of anyone, but not everyone dares to do that: Thoughtful, intelligent and sour.

16.- When you were born, the doctor didn’t know whether to keep you or the placenta: And it seems he made the wrong decision.

17.- There are thousands of words in our language, but it is not possible to combine them to express how much I want to hit you with a chair: For the literati at heart.

18.- Do you have an inverted digestive system?: Useful for people who spit out stinky and smelly words all the time.

Creative insults from movies and television series.

19.- You are a damn inanimate object: In “Bruges” (2008).

20.- I think that when you were born they should have put you in a jar with formaldehyde: In “There Will Be Blood” (2007).

21.- Even if I were blind, desperate, hungry and on a desert island, you are the last person I would sleep with: In “Scarface” (1983).

22.- You are halfway between a cockroach and that whitish thing that accumulates on your lips when you are thirsty: In Con-Air (1997).

23.- Do you know what I’m going to give you for Christmas? A large wooden cross. So that every time you feel devalued for your sacrifices, you can climb up and stick to it: In “The Ref” (1994).

24.- You are an idiot. Now, you always have been and always will be. The only chance you have for that to change is to evolve into an absolute idiot: In “Bruges” (2008).

25.- My God, you are the worst chaos, a damn disaster, that’s what you are. You know, you’re like that coffee machine, which from the bean to the cup screws up everything: In “Malcom Tucker, The Thick of It.”

26.- It is as useless as a foam dildo: In “the Loop” (2009).

27.- I would love to stop and chat with you, but I would rather have type 2 diabetes: In the Loop (2009).

28.- His stupidity is so dense that the light around him fades: In “Malcom Tucker, The Thick of It.”

29.- You are as funny as a blind child in a minefield: In “the Loop” (2009).

30.- Your brain is so small that a cannibal wouldn’t be able to make a canapé: In “Blackadder”.

31.- Your eyes are open and your mouth moves, but your brain died long ago: In “Blackadder”.

32.- He is so dirty that a dung beetle wouldn’t let him into his house: In “Blackadder”.

33.- We are looking for an aggressive oaf with the intelligence of a four-year-old child and the sexual sophistication of a monkey: In “Blackadder.”

Creative insults are fun and often truly admirable. The trick is knowing where, when and with whom to use them.

How to respond to an insult without putting yourself down?

We have all been the target of offenses at some point in our lives. One of the things that frustrates us the most is when we can’t find a way to defend ourselves in the moment. If you are tired of not knowing how to respond to an insult, here we give you some tips and phrases.

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When you receive an insult of any kind (whether direct or disguised as a compliment), these are the first steps you should take:

1. Control anger

I know it’s difficult because you will feel hurt, but if you are not calm you will not be able to think clearly and you will get carried away by the situation. Try not to take what they tell you to heart, don’t lose control due to anger.

2. Accept it

I’m not going crazy telling you this. I mean that many times we have to think about whether it is really an insult or constructive criticism that simply hurts us to hear. To detect what it is, look at who told you, under what circumstances, and how they told you.

3. Respond to the insult

You must be smart and respond at the right time. If you do it later, you will lose the effect you really want to achieve. But if I’m honest, the best fights are the ones you avoid. As a general rule, I recommend that you do not respond so as not to aggravate the situation.

Now, if you really want to respond to the insult, here are some tips:

How to insult someone and make them hurt?

If you know the person you want to insult, don’t use the typical “Your mother.” That phrase is so generic that it is not something that can really affect you. We all have insecurities and if you know that person’s insecurities you can respond by mentioning them.

Whether it’s her way of being, her appearance or her belongings, you can criticize her with sarcasm and a smile. Mockery is something that hurts us all, even more so if it is done through our insecurities.

Another way to respond is to ignore the person or simply laugh. Even if you feel angry, you often hurt the person who insults you more when you don’t show them that what they said affected you. Laughing in response also increases the anger of the person who wants to hurt you.

Phrases to silence a trustworthy person

Do you want to put a believer in his place? Here are some phrases you can use:

– They only tolerate you out of interest, or do you think they do it because you are pretty and nice?

– I’m not insulting you because I have to explain it to you later, and how lazy.

– Do you know why you brag so much? Because inside you have nothing. What’s more, nothing is worth more than you.

– Were you born like this or were you dropped from the crib when you were little?

– I would like to insult you, but nature did it so well with you that I don’t think I can beat it.

– I’m not your type? It’s not like I was going to donate blood to you.

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– Tell me what you boast about and I will tell you what you lack.

– I would be on your side, but then we would both be wrong.

How to make discreet insults?

Do you want to insult, but in a subtle way, without the person knowing? Turn the insult into a compliment. That is, flatter the person sarcastically and telling them the opposite of what you really think. Some phrases you could use are:

– With that skirt you look super thin: You don’t see the bad thing, right? but in reality you are calling her fat and that the garment hides it.

– ¡How pretty you look today! Are you going out somewhere special?: With this you are telling her that she is always disorganized since by adding “Today” you are classifying her.

– That haircut looks much better on you than the one you had before!

– Not that you were the last Coca-Cola in the desert.

– I’m going to put your opinions in my bank account to see if they generate interest.

Phrases to respond when they insult you

You have no idea how to respond to an insult? I’ll tell you some clever phrases so that you can emerge victorious in an argument with insults:

– Life is hard, but it is much harder when you are stupid.

– If you know everything, I imagine you also know when to shut up.

– Better people than you have told me worse things.

– Now I understand why people speak so badly about you.

– I understand that no one is perfect, but do you have to remind me every time you speak?

– Have you ever been told that you are too basic a person? You don’t even do insults well.

How to respond to insults and ridicule?

If someone makes fun of you or tries not to fall into their game. Instead, respond with wit and then walk away calmly, don’t give them any more opportunities to be insulted.

Some phrases you can use are:

– You’re done? I have more important things to do than listen to your nonsense.

– Don’t you have a life of your own? You’re always looking out for mine.

– Yes I am like that, so what? At least I’m happy with my life and I’m not worried about other people’s.