How to get a girlfriend: 20 steps to make her choose you –

Know the sequence of steps you need to take to get a girlfriend by making yourself her most obvious option, so that she chooses you instead of all the options she has.

In this article you will not find the classic advice of “be more confident in yourself” or “talk to more women”, because we assume that you already know them and perhaps they have not worked for you.

You will find 20 proven steps that you can put into practice now to attract the woman you want and make her want to become your partner. Pay attention to the strategy and follow it at each stage to be successful.

How to get a girlfriend? Part I: Meeting girls

This guide is divided into three parts: meeting girls, getting dates and finalizing the relationship. Let’s take the first steps to have a successful first meeting and get your phone.

1. Stop trying to get a girlfriend

As counterintuitive as it may sound, the first and most important step to getting a girlfriend is to stop trying. Instead, let go of expectations completely whenever you meet someone.

When women realize that you are looking for a girlfriend, they shy away as if you had leprosy. When you don’t really care, they start stalking you. That’s how it works. We are not making this up.

Most men lose a little common sense around a woman they like, but if you stay calm and don’t show that you are desperate for a relationship, you will stand out from the rest and that will automatically make you more socially attractive.

Men like the challenge. Women like “special”. So when a man is decidedly not going through life looking for hookup opportunities, they immediately want that guy.

2. Get their attention

Clothes, accessories, tattoos, even personality, are all lures designed to attract the attention of certain people. What type of elements will attract the attention of the type of woman you want to conquer?

While still being yourself, you must become the best version of yourself and carefully choose one or two elements that help you stand out. Some dark glasses. A leather jacket. A woven bracelet. The alternatives are thousands. But don’t overdo it, you don’t want to look like a Christmas tree either.

And the same applies with personality. You don’t have to be loud. You want to draw their attention in a subtle way, so that they never notice that this is the goal.

Read our guide on how to get a girlfriend: 20 Steps to make her choose you

3. Prepare to approach her

Before you make the first approach move, get rid of all expectations, both positive and negative. Don’t approach her thinking either that she is going to be the mother of your children, or that she is going to reject you immediately.

If you don’t, those preconceived ideas will influence the first contact in one way or another, and what you need is for it to flow naturally, relaxed and spontaneous.

You must also let go of fear. Here are some twists that you can take advantage of to turn an excuse for not approaching into an excuse to do so as soon as possible:

There’s no point in me going over to talk to her, she’s not going to be interested in me = I should go over and talk to her, she looks bored and maybe I can entertain her for a while. She’s completely out of my league = I’ll go find out if she’s as fun as I am .Probably he only likes tall and handsome guys = Maybe in addition to looking good on the outside, he has an interesting conversation. I’ll go find out.

All of this will help you neutralize negative anticipations without creating unrealistic expectations that could make you feel disappointed.

4. Approach without causing mistrust

Now that you are mentally and emotionally prepared, it is time to approach her, and your attitude is everything. Something that women hate is when a man approaches with flirting intentions and when they don’t see an immediate response, they begin to be sarcastic, ironic, aggressive or pedantic.

Don’t approach him with a passive aggressive strategy. Try to make her laugh from the beginning and if you don’t succeed, be humble. Smile, relax, use expressive body language that does not seem invasive.

While talking to her, monitor that your tone of voice is not too high or too low. Pronounce it correctly and make sure she understands the first sentence you say to her first.

Avoid trite introductions like “sorry,” “excuse me,” or “friend.” You don’t have to apologize for anything nor is she your friend yet. How about a simple, genuine and thoughtful “hello”? Always smiling and respecting her personal space.

Avoid touching her, much less without her realizing that you have approached. No one likes it, least of all women, when a stranger takes such confidence, even if it is by drawing his attention with a finger on his shoulder.

The only exception to this rule is when they are in an environment that is too loud for you to get their attention with words alone, such as a concert or a busy bar.

5. Keep compliments genuine and rare

And after “hello” what? The best way to lose his interest, unless you look like Brad Pitt in his prime or Jason Momoa, is to say any of the following:

-You are very pretty (probably you already know this and have already been told it a thousand times)

-You caught my attention (that’s obvious, otherwise you wouldn’t have approached me. Don’t be redundant)

– What is your name? (It would be good if you explained why you closed yourself off before interrogating her)

– You seem like an interesting woman (This is a very general excuse. Better tell her what you found interesting about her)

Phrases that can help you open a conversation and make her feel comfortable must always be in accordance with the context, because it is not the same to approach a girl alone at a party, to one who is browsing through the shelves of a library, or to one who He is reading a book in a cafe.

– Hello! You seem kind of bored. I do not judge you. Do you want us to be bored together for a while?

– I hate to interrupt you, but, I couldn’t help but notice that you are reading a book by Kundera. He is one of my favorite authors, would you mind if I invited you to share opinions?

– Surely you come to get a book and not a friend, but perhaps we will not meet again. So: Hello! I’m Luis. what is your name?

6. Joke with her

Humor is one of the best ways to create sexual tension between two people, especially when you show that you are not afraid to joke about the situation, which is obviously courting.

Instead of taking it too seriously, let him see that this is a fun game that you want to play together.

Understanding how this dynamic works can be very complex for some kids because it requires a very special balance between annoying a little, surprising and at the same time making it clear that it is a joke, so we will analyze it with three practical examples:

Example 1:

She:

I like the cats

You:

I hate cats: IncorrectI love cats: incorrectOh really? Me too! What’s more, they are my favorite dish: Correct

Example 2:

She:

I spend a lot of time reading

You:

Reading? How boring, don’t you have something better to do?: IncorrectMe too! I love reading… books are my life: IncorrectSo it’s not enough for you to be pretty. You are so conceited that you also want to be cultured: Correct

Example 3:

She:

I am studying psychology

You:

And apart from going to waste time at school, what do you do?: IncorrectReally? Let’s see what day of these you can give me therapy: IncorrectExcellent! You’re already used to dealing with crazy people, so it’s like you already know me: Correct

The examples above show you that completely agreeing with everything she says or does is not a good strategy, nor is confronting her in a rude or petulant manner. The jokes you make have to carry an unspoken compliment towards her.

7. Make her the main topic of the conversation

Listening to her carefully and making her feel the center of attention of the conversation is an excellent way to get opportunities to joke with her and also generate new topics to keep her wanting to continue talking to you.

It’s no secret that women like to feel interesting. So manage to make the conversation seem like a dance: you wear it, but she shines.

In addition, when you focus the conversation on her, you are much less likely to make errors of judgment and make false moves, since it leaves you space to analyze her body language, her tastes and her expectations while she talks about herself.

When it’s your turn to talk about yourself, never lose sight of the fact that women like funny men, but men who are funny and also a little mysterious drive them crazy. Do not give more information than is strictly necessary and create a bit of mystery.

If he takes the bait, he will insist and that will be the perfect excuse to ask for his number so you can continue chatting through messages or on a date.

Read our guide on how to chat with a girl: 9 tips to impress her with your talk

8. Get his number

If you’ve already made her laugh once or twice, there’s a good chance she’ll give you her number if you ask. Or at least add you to Facebook. Don’t make the mistake of letting her go because you didn’t dare take her phone from her or she from you. This is much more common than you might think.

Usually, the exchange of phones is the part that closes the first meeting. Plus, it’s a good way out if you feel like you started well, but you’re starting to run out of ideas or you suddenly get nervous.

Simply tell her that you have to leave now but that you would like to continue talking with her. Do it naturally. Even if you don’t really have to go anywhere, or you are at the same party or bar, it is good that after reaching this goal you retire to talk with your friends or interact with other people, this way you give them space and don’t show excess interest.

For example, if you are at a wedding, you chatted with her for a while, she gave you her number and you returned to your table, you can let an hour pass and send her a funny message. You’ll probably make her laugh and complicity will begin to form between you.

How to get a girlfriend? Part II: Getting the appointment

You already have their number and, to some extent, their interest. But losing him is very easy and any mistake can take you out of his prospects landscape. You need to make an appointment quickly and generate expectations for it. In this second part we will explain how to do it.

9. The old reliable: text and forget

It is not necessary to delve too deeply into this point, because the difficult thing is not to explain or understand it, but to put it into practice. The first message you send can be a funny emoticon (no kisses or hearts, much less eggplants), the WhatsApp ghost is always a good option.

But from there the real challenge begins. What to say to her without seeming too interested in her? How to keep her attention without boring her or scaring her away?

It’s not about letting 24 hours pass before responding. But don’t stay glued to the phone and answer each and every message right away. You have a life, right? Do you remember the mystery part?

It’s not enough…