Rules to keep a long-distance relationship alive –

Making a traditional relationship work is complicated enough on its own. But knowing how to keep a long-distance relationship alive can involve even greater challenges and difficulties.

In this article I will give you the necessary tools so that the flame of love continues latent despite those kilometers that separate them.

Do long distance relationships work?

It is impossible to generalize in one answer that long distance relationships work or don’t work. The answer, as in most topics that involve human feelings, is a resounding “it depends.”

Distance is a difficulty that can be overcome when the couple actively works to keep the other sides of their relationship at an optimal level.

On the other hand, it will be very difficult for a relationship to survive if in addition to the distance it has other problems, or if it does not find an assertive way to face the problems derived from the distance.

In other words, the answer to the question of whether long-distance relationships work is: yes, but only when there is a lot of communication, openness and, not least, realistic expectations in the short, medium and long term.

Read our guide on 7 ways to know if your relationship has a future

What are the main problems of a long-distance relationship?

Not being able to hug and kiss your partner as frequently as you would like is undoubtedly one of the disadvantages of a long-distance relationship, but it is neither remotely the only nor the most important one.

When the other person is thousands of miles away from us, strong feelings of:

1. Distrust

Although lies are something that can appear in any type of relationship, whether in person or at a distance, we have the notion that it is easier to lie when we are far away, since there are fewer opportunities for people to discover that what we say is not true. .

If there is not good communication, it is much easier for mistrust to appear.

2. Insecurity and jealousy

From mistrust comes the direct suspicion that our partner is not being completely faithful to us or is having relationships with more people.

In fact, distrusting the fidelity of the other or discovering infidelity is the most frequent pretext for which a long-distance couple ends.

Read our guide on how to stop being jealous and distrustful

3. Infidelity

It is logical that the temptation to be unfaithful is greater when we are immersed in a long-distance relationship, simply because that relationship cannot give us physical satisfaction that we could obtain by giving access to another person.

When we recognize that feeling in ourselves, we are forced to recognize it in others and jealousy increases.

Read our guide on how to overcome infidelity and the 21 ways to maintain a marriage

Lack of joint plans

Although mistrust, jealousy, and infidelity are serious problems in long-distance relationships, people often don’t realize that the most serious problem is none of the above.

When the couple is separated, but there are realistic plans for the future, such as moving in together when one of them finishes college or saves enough, it is possible to endure all the hardships because both know that, at a certain time, a little or a lot, they will finally They can be together.

A relationship that does not have at least a tentative date to meet cannot work, and will end up breaking down under the pretext of infidelity or mistrust.

How to have a successful long distance relationship?

There are three elements that are never missing in long-distance relationships that do work:

1.- Communication

Communication is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship, but there are many levels of communication that go beyond verbal.

In a remote dynamic, it is common for the parties to limit communication to text messages, which is much less rich and meaningful than face-to-face communication.

The tone of voice and expressions often give us contextual clues about the information that the other wants to convey to us, but when these are missing, it is necessary for us to be much more specific with respect to how we feel to avoid misinterpretations.

2.- Trust

Trust in a long-distance relationship is an all or nothing issue.

When we only “half trust” our partner, it means that we don’t really trust them and it really doesn’t make sense to continue in the relationship because nothing they do or say will make us really trust them 100%, since to a large extent they are It’s a personal decision.

Just as you trust that you are going to be loyal, faithful, and well-intentioned, you need to trust that your partner will be, too. This doesn’t mean that you stop seeing warning signs when they occur, but it does mean that you don’t insist on seeing warning signs all the time.

3.- Plans

When you are in a “normal” relationship, at first there is usually no rush to make plans for the future, and it is even best not to rush. But a long-distance relationship means that they are so sure that they want to be with each other that they are willing to endure those miles while it lasts.

So, if you’re not going anywhere in particular with your long-distance partner, it may be better for both of you to look for a more viable relationship closer to you.

For such a dynamic to work, they need to have serious plans to get together, preferably in the short or medium term.

How to maintain a teenage relationship at a distance?

Relationships between adolescents, especially if they are long-distance, are more vulnerable than those between adults because young people are still discovering themselves and their expectations in a relationship.

Basically, the advice for having a long-distance relationship between adults is the same among teenagers, but in the case of the latter it is necessary to give special importance to security, especially if the members of the couple have never seen each other. in person.

Hundreds of teenagers are victims every year of fraudsters and people with bad intentions who seduce them with false profiles and even make them travel to other countries secretly from their parents.

In these cases, adolescents who fall into the trap are at the mercy of individuals who abuse them in various ways.

If you are a minor and are getting involved in a long-distance relationship with someone you don’t know well, always notify your parents and never neglect your safety.

How to keep a long-distance relationship alive if you previously had a face-to-face relationship

Frequently, couples who have a “normal” relationship must face drastic changes in the lives of one of them. For example, a study or work opportunity arises in another country, or the family moves to another place in the case of adolescents.

For a relationship to survive something like this, it is important that both are very sure that it is indeed worth submitting to the deprivations and sacrifices that a long-distance relationship implies. For this to happen, they need to have realistic plans for the future.

Maybe in a while they can finally move in together, or at least whoever left will return to the country. If that expectation does not exist, it is best to end the courtship on the best possible terms.

Remember that the younger they are, the more difficult it will be for them to keep a long-distance relationship working.

How to maintain a long-distance relationship without knowing each other?

On the other hand, there are long-distance relationships that arise between individuals who have never met in person.

Every day it is more common for two people to establish contact through a chat, a social network or an online application, and although their geographical location prevents them from knowing each other, they begin to develop strong feelings for each other.

One of the main drawbacks in this type of long-distance relationships is that when we only know about the other what they decide to show us, it is easier for us to be deceived or to build an overly idealized idea of ​​their personality or feelings.

As in any other type of long-distance relationship, the main factor for it to work is that the couple actually has plans to meet and interact more closely at some point.

Sexuality in a long distance relationship

And what about relationships in bed? Obviously, to have relationships it is necessary not only to be in the same country, but also in the same bedroom and in the same bed, and definitely having a long-distance relationship does not magically “anesthetize” us from physical desires.

Through video calls, voice calls and text messages, erotic messages and very stimulating images can also be exchanged.

Some couples who have or have had a long-distance relationship indicate that these exchanges can be equal to or even more intense than those of traditional sexuality. Others claim that they are not as satisfactory.

The important thing is that in a long-distance relationship they find the way that best suits them to express their sexuality, because if they try to repress it, at some point said sexuality could be expressed in the form of flirting with someone else or even infidelity.

Games for long distance relationships

One of the most important elements of love is the playful component, that is, the ability to play, joke and have fun.

In long-distance relationships, coexistence is less and therefore there are fewer spaces to fool around and laugh, so it never hurts to propose some dynamics and games that serve this particular purpose.

They can play guessing what they are wearing, anticipating what the other is thinking, asking each other riddles and riddles, telling jokes, playing an online game as a team, etc.

The possibilities are as endless as your creativity. What matters is that you never downplay the importance of having fun together.

As you can see, how to keep a long-distance relationship alive is even more complex than maintaining a traditional relationship, but that doesn’t mean it can’t work if there is will, communication, and trust on both sides.

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