14 reasons why you have never had a girlfriend and how to avoid them –

Having a stable relationship is not easy, especially when you are in the first phase of falling in love, in which you may have had a couple of dates but the relationship has not yet materialized definitively.

14 Reasons Why You’ve Never Had a Girlfriend and How to Avoid These Behaviors

That is the crucial moment to consolidate the couple and, believe it or not, there are many men who do not know how to take that important step and that is why they make similar mistakes that undermine their efforts.

One of my friends is one of those men who fail in love. No matter what he does – or what he changes – it seems that none of his attempts come to fruition.

«I treat them well, I take them to expensive places, I try to please them in everything, we exchange contacts and write to each other for months. Then they leave me when I want to formalize the relationship! I don’t know if it’s bad luck, or if they’re just using me, but the story always ends the same. “Then I see them with my friends or with jerks,” she says.

His story is not unique, so if you identified with it, keep reading because we bring you the 14 main reasons why many men find it difficult to establish a relationship. The good news? By knowing them you will be able to understand your flaws and correct them to soon find that partner you want.

1. You assume that you are not attracted to girls

Your main enemy is yourself. If you constantly assume a priori that no woman will find you attractive, that’s what’s going to happen. Without realizing it, you create a negative atmosphere around you and undermine your own confidence, destroying any opportunity to feel safe and dare to talk to the girl you like.

By thinking in this negative way, your mind will focus on closing your chances of success long before you have taken the first step.

And in the event that it was a woman who decided to approach you, your lack of self-esteem is expressed with apathy and lack of security. He’ll probably think that you’re not attracted to him enough or he’ll lose interest when he notices that you don’t believe in yourself.

No one likes to be rejected, that’s normal, but you can’t let that fear stop you from approaching the woman you’re attracted to. Surely you have already attracted other women and by not acting in time you lost the opportunity for a real relationship.

And if you’re already dating a girl and you have doubts, don’t be afraid to have an honest conversation with her. This move is smarter than suspecting things that may never have crossed her mind.

Remember that first you have to value yourself. If you don’t love yourself, how do you expect others to?

Read our guide on how to have a girlfriend if you are ugly and shy: This is how you have to do it

2. You haven’t found the right girl

This is probably the simplest scenario: you haven’t had a girlfriend, because you haven’t yet crossed paths with the woman who moves your floor. That is normal.

Don’t feel frustrated if you haven’t gotten the woman of your dreams yet. Love is not always something easy to find. In the meantime, you can see the relationships – short or long – you may have had as good learning experiences.

If there is any point in being single and having several partners, it is being able to recognize what qualities you want and value in a woman, which is very important to find a harmonious relationship with a person who goes hand in hand with your values, plans to follow. future and life goals.

But destiny cannot be manufactured. In any case, and while you find that right person, perhaps the most logical questions you should ask yourself are: Am I looking for girlfriends in the right places? What do I aspire from a relationship?

Meeting new people is always important. Maintain an active social life, join sports groups, attend classes and try new activities. Not only do they help you grow as a person, but they are excellent opportunities to meet new people.

Still, if you don’t want to or find it difficult to contact in person, you have no excuse. Social networks and dating apps are a good window to meet people and start conversations without the pressure of speaking face to face.

3. You show that you lack self-confidence

Maybe the fact that you haven’t had a girlfriend makes you feel embarrassed or self-conscious because you have less experience in relationships, and maybe you think that girls care about that when you ask them out.

The truth is that women do value experience, but more than that, they care about attitude. Your problem may lie precisely in the fact that you don’t trust yourself and that’s why you project an unattractive image.

It is normal that you feel afraid of exposing yourself or feel vulnerable, but you must learn to control it. Part of confidence lies in being able to project yourself beyond your doubts.

Basically it’s all about attitude and your body language: take a deep breath, stand up straight, stick your chest out, raise your face and talk to girls face-to-face. Even if you are shaking inside, show all the confidence in the world to others.

Over time you will notice that acting like a confident person will help you internalize that confidence.

Read our guide on how to seduce girls: show confidence

4. You keep clinging to your failed attempts

It is one thing to have been made to suffer for love and another to close yourself off from the possibility of trying again to find the stable partner you want.

The past serves to learn lessons and avoid repeating the mistakes made, but once you do you must move on. Life is too short to stay stuck in what has already happened.

A wise saying says that “Sometimes you lose, and sometimes you learn”, it depends on you whether the learning is greater.

Use your memories to better analyze what happened in your failed attempts, how those women were similar, and when they began to lose interest in you. That will give you a good overview to evaluate your behavior and what things to avoid so as not to scare away future dates.

One thing is for sure: avoid talking to any new date about that past and failed relationships. If you are still just starting out and don’t have enough trust, you don’t need to bring up all the suffering or pain you’ve been through.

Avoid details that expose you. In no way is this about lying, it’s just that these are details that are irrelevant, at least not at that initial moment in a relationship.

5. They make fun of you

An important part of the confidence and self-esteem required to attract women is the group of people around you.

If your friends constantly pressure you or make fun of your lack of a partner, it is more than understandable that this topic causes you shame and insecurity.

The dynamics of groups of friends usually always include one that everyone makes fun of or, simply, the one with whom they make the most jokes. It doesn’t mean that they don’t love you, but it does mean that there is an asymmetry in their friendship relationship.

It’s time to start thinking about whether this is really the kind of friendship you want in your life and whether you want to remain part of the followers of the group instead of the leaders.

Leaders always tend to be more attractive to women, unlike the “clown” of the group.

You may need to change your group dynamic or find another one where you’re not always the target of ridicule, because that definitely affects how women see you.

Your friends, whether aware of it or not, may be ruining your chance of finding a stable partner, so you should look at the situation objectively.

Remember that reinventing yourself is always an option. You can go out on your own, with other groups of less intimidating and more discreet friends who do not affect your self-esteem or, at least, do not diminish your confidence in the moments when you need it most.

6. You have let yourself be carried away by others

Returning a bit to the information from the previous point: if you were or are part of a group in which you do not lead, it is possible that you have become accustomed to letting others decide for you to avoid misunderstandings.

Maybe you prefer to go unnoticed and that is why you often agree to do things or go out to places that you don’t like in order to meet the group. You end up acting as others, the leaders of the group, want.

This may be your way of avoiding arguments, but it rather projects an image of poor judgment and even low self-esteem. When you agree with everyone, without expressing your own opinion, what you demonstrate is a lack of personality.

If you please a girl in everything, at first she will think you are cute but then she will get bored of being with someone who does not have the power to express an opinion and take control over a situation.

As contradictory as it may seem, every relationship deserves confrontation, so from now on learn to say no from time to time. She may be briefly upset, but she will understand that you are not an easy man to convince and manipulate like a puppet.

And on the other hand, it will increase respect between both of you, and you will keep her interested in your personality.

7. You are conceited

These types of men are the complete opposite of the “follower” guy. These are men who are excessively confident in themselves and who believe they have the right to impose their opinions, tastes and interests.

Although women prefer risky and dominant men. If you fit into the “cocky” group, you have surpassed confidence.

Women need their space, to be cared for and, above all, respected. When they feel that the person they are dating does not value them enough, they lose interest.

At first they will think you are very attractive, but then you will seem insolent and detestable and you will be alone again, as at the beginning. It is good that you know your value, but that does not mean you should act disrespectfully.

8. They only see you as a friend

I will tell you two stories and you will recognize which one you identify with:

a) Matías has been in love with Natalia for years, but she is the most beautiful and incredible girl in the place and he doubts that she pays attention to him.

Her boyfriends are the athletic type, fun and she is always surrounded by many friends.

They usually take her to parties and very expensive places, and they also give her incredible gifts.

But Matías has noticed that they are all essentially interested parties who take advantage of her and abandon her shortly after.

He has always been there, before her eyes, but Natalia only hugs him when she needs comfort after a breakup and forgets him when she has entered a new relationship.

b) All the women you share with have expressed how adorable you are, they tell you that you would be “the perfect boyfriend”, but none of them have shown that they like you or have given you a chance as a couple.

How are both examples similar? Same problem: women only see you as a friend, and when that happens, it’s very difficult to make the transition to them seeing you as a potential partner again.

Unfortunately, you have allowed yourself to be labeled with the attitude of being the good boy who comforts them, guides them and offers his shoulder so that they feel that they are not alone.

We don’t blame you for being sensitive, no one likes to see a woman cry, especially when you appreciate her, but if you don’t want to be just a friend you should make it clear to everyone.

Treat her with affection and interest, listen to her if she wants to talk to you, but always keep your intentions clear. Don’t stop flirting with him, don’t let him stop…