See the main questions about aroace and learn what this identity is

Have you ever heard of aroace? This is the abbreviation used to refer to people who identify as aromantic and asexual, part of the letter A in LGBTQIA+. Researcher Caio Benevides Pedra and aroace Verônica Helena do Padro Vital help you understand this identity.

What is aroace?

Short for aromantic and asexual, aroace people do not experience sexual or romantic attraction. The opposite of aromanticity is romanticity, and of asexuality is allosexuality.

Caio Benevides Pedra, who is a researcher at the Legal Nucleus of Sexual and Gender Diversity at UFMG (Diverso) and Coordinator of Academic Production of the Sexual and Gender Diversity Commission at OAB/MG, explains that “sexuality and romanticity are not synonymous , because one refers to romantic attraction and the other is sexual”.

These identities can present themselves separately. A person can be asexual and not feel sexual attraction to any person, but not be aromantic and feel romantic attraction. That is, it is possible to be asexual and not be aromantic, for example.

According to the researcher, “this is not 100% absolute, as an asexual person does not mean they will never be sexually attracted, and an aromantic person is not the person who will never be romantically involved with someone.”

Caio explains that “there is a spectrum within this. In the future, this spectrum may turn into other groups.” Asexuality and aromanticity can be understood as specters that have a gray area, which includes people who only feel sexual or romantic attraction sporadically, in specific contexts.

For example, demisexual people, who only feel sexual attraction when they already have a deep emotional connection with the person. Caio informs that this “is already a subgroup of asexuality, because she can even feel sexual attraction, but the behavior is very specific. Within the aromantic group, there are also people who experience romantic love, but in a specific way and outside of what we consider the norm”.

This is an understudied subject, as highlighted by the researcher. He says that “the advancement of studies, the political agenda and the issues that put these groups on the agenda depends on a flow, which is directly related to visibility”.

Thus, it is essential that asexuality and aromanticity become a common subject in the media, so that this topic is discussed further. The representation of aroace in fiction is also another step towards making this group more visible. In this case, it is possible to mention some characters with this spectrum, such as the book Without loveby writer Alice Oseman, the same author of heartstopper and from the series Bojack Horseman.

The researcher explains that this visibility is essential for people who are aroace to be able to recognize themselves and even identify the feelings they have, but do not know how to name. According to Caio, “sometimes people don’t even know they’re asexual and/or aromantic. She just knows that she feels a lot of discomfort and they know that there is a social expectation on top of the way people relate to each other”.

More than that, the researcher explains that “the person knows that they do not relate as the pattern expects, that they have no sexual interest or no romantic interest. That’s why this person charges himself. It is precisely because it does not know that there are other ways of relating that society only learns one way of identifying itself”.

the aroace flags

The asexual flag is formed by the colors black and white, which represent respectively asexuality and the asexual spectrum. White represents allies outside the asexual spectrum and purple symbolizes the entire community.

The aromantic flag is composed of the colors green, light green, white, gray and black. They represent aromantic people, the aromantic spectrum, platonic relationships, asexual and allosexual aromantics.

There is also the aroace flag, to identify people who are asexual and aromantic anywhere on the spectrum. It is composed of two shades of blue, a white stripe, a yellow stripe and an orange stripe. They represent the aromantic and asexual spectrum, aplatonic people, non-conventional relationships, romantic and sexual relationships, and community.

Characteristics of the aroace person

Asexual people are people with total or partial absence of sexual attraction to other people, while aromantic people are people who do not feel, in a total or partial way, romantic attraction to other people. Verônica Helena do Padro Vital is an aroace person, in the gray area of ​​both spectrums, and tells a little more about these characteristics.

Characteristics of asexuality

To talk about the characteristics of asexuality, Veronica highlights that “sexual attraction is conceptually different from what is understood by libido and sexual desire. Asexual people do not experience sexual attraction directed towards other individuals, or when they do, it is a rare, partial, and somewhat conditional attraction.”

It is essential to highlight that “asexual people experience in a different and unique way at the individual level and the issues related to sexual attraction”, in this way the experiences, experiences and characteristics differ from one person to another.

Veronica shares that “all my life I felt that I didn’t fit in with the existing expectations about relationships and for a long time I believed that there was something wrong with me or that I just hadn’t found the right person”, precisely because when the subject is not disclosed , people tend to believe that there is only one pattern.

“I realized that I wasn’t attracted in the same way and at the same frequency as other people. My interest in relating more closely to others was rare, conditional, and rather fickle. Even though I occasionally have an interest in having sexual relationships with other people, this is not fundamental and indispensable in my life, so I identify with the gray area of ​​the spectrum.

Characteristics of Aromaticity

As asexuality and aromanticity are specters, “Strict aromanticity is made up of people who do not feel romantic attraction on any level and under any circumstances. In addition, there are those who are in the gray area of ​​aromanticity and who may feel romantic attraction, depending on some circumstances”, says Verônica.

In the case of Veronica, “understanding me as aro is more recent and it has been a more difficult process for me to understand ace. Before understanding myself as aro, it was common to feel romantic attraction in a few scarce moments and try to take it further, but I had no idea of ​​my limits and tried to follow the standard behaviors, leading my relationships to failure.”

She says that “the thought of having a romantic relationship with someone made me extremely nervous, to the point of getting sick. I have always loved literary novels, fanfics, dramas and clichéd romantic comedies. However, when I was the one involved in this plot things were quite different.”

Therefore, understanding how aroace was essential for Vital. “Today, after discovering myself aroace, I understand myself better, I have support within the community to which I belong and I am fully aware of the infinite possibilities that exist to relate, not depending on the way that normative romantic love imposes”, he informs.

Doubts about being aroace

Due to the lack of knowledge about the aroace experience, it is common for many people to have several doubts about the subject. Verônica says that “in addition to other friends from the Aroace community, I have never talked to anyone who had extensive knowledge about asexuality and who had no doubts”. So, here are the main ones:

Is asexuality a hormonal/psychological dysfunction?

Verônica Helena do Padro Vital (VV): In no way, asexuality is not a dysfunction in any aspect and point.

Can asexuals have sex?

VV: There is confusion about the definition of asexuality, people commonly do not differentiate sexual attraction from desire, libido and the desire or taste for the sexual act. So yes, they can, because there is a spectrum within asexuality.

Is it possible to be aroace and pan?

VV: Yes, it is possible. Some people on the aromatic and asexual spectrum may still experience sexual or romantic attraction. In this way, those who are aroace may have a parallel gender-guided sexual and/or romantic orientation that indicates which genders we are sexually or romantically attracted to in cases where we do. In summary, an aroace can also be pansexual, panromantic, or other orientations.

Can an aroace person date?

VV: Yes. Even I’m dating right now. And I can even understand why this is one of the most common doubts among people. Just think that no dating, not even those between allosexuals, is the same. Each relationship is unique and built in the way of the people who make it up. The same happens for aroaces people. The existence of sexual attraction and/or romantic attraction is not a mandatory prerequisite for dating, this is a limiting view of what constitutes a relationship and what may be the motivations for two people to decide to share their life with each other. other. This without taking into account the diversity of experiences within the spectrum that have very individual characteristics.

Wouldn’t orientations within the asexual gray area be personality traits?

VV: This question shows a lack of knowledge about both the concept of personality trait and the spectrum of asexuality itself. So one thing has nothing to do with the other.

These are some of the main doubts that people usually have because they are unaware of the aroace spectrum.

Videos and reports about the aroace

Want to know more about it? Check out this selection of videos with reports from people on the aromatic and asexual spectrum, to learn more about how diverse the spectrum is and that each person has their own experience:

the asexual spectrum

This is a great introductory video to introduce the asexual spectrum. In it you learn simply and quickly about what asexuality is.

Ace and rim are independent identities

In this video, Mayra Sigwalt invites writer and translator Laura Pohl to talk about aromanticity. This video is great for understanding how sexual attraction and romantic attraction are two independent feelings that may or may not be related. They also talk about characters on the ace spectrum in works of fiction.

asexual representation

In this other video, Bárbara Morais joins Mayra Sigwalt again to recommend books with asexual characters. Reading about the experience of asexual people is a great way to better understand asexuality. In addition, it is important to consume these contents for the media to understand that this is an important topic.

Am I asexual?

This video presents several feelings that are usually common for asexual people. It can be very informative for those who are discovering themselves…