Why my ex has a girlfriend so quickly – her main reasons

They say getting over a breakup takes half the time you shared as a couple. But this can vary. It’s painful when you’ve just broken up and your ex manages to move on. So fast, he gets a new partner when you’re still trying to get over him.

When this happens, it is common for you to wonder “why does my ex have a girlfriend so quickly?” If that is your case, we will tell you some of the reasons that may answer your question.

Why does my ex have a girlfriend so quickly?

When you find out that your ex-partner is already in a relationship, it is very likely that two main thoughts run through your mind, both very negative:

1. I didn’t love you enough

You probably think that if it didn’t take him much time to get over you it’s because you didn’t mean much to him. There was inequality in his relationship and you believe that you loved him more than he loved you.

2. Maybe he was dating her behind your back.

The other thought that arises is suspicion: how did he get another woman so quickly? A logical answer is that this new couple already had a long way to go… probably when you were still together.

Although in principle these reasons may seem logical to you, the reality can be much more complex. The question “why does my ex have a girlfriend so quickly?” may have answers that go beyond simple infidelity. It will be more difficult to understand if you just let yourself be carried away by anger.

Why do men end one relationship and start another so quickly?

It is a popular belief that women are more sentimental than men. That is why it is considered more common for the man to turn the page and jump from one relationship to another without waiting long, while the woman cries inconsolably for the lost relationship.

The reality is that this may be common, but it is not a norm. Both sexes may feel the same pain or difficulty moving forward. Ending a relationship and starting another doesn’t mean there weren’t real feelings, it may just be your ex’s way of handling loneliness.

Everyone has their own way of getting over breakups. If your ex got his new girlfriend quickly, it could be for several reasons:

1. He’s doing it to get over you.

Have you heard the phrase “one nail pulls out another nail”? Many people take it literally and perhaps your ex is one of them. Sometimes a breakup can be so painful that the way they find to cope with it is to find a distraction.

Starting a new relationship is an exciting process. Finding a person who is attracted to you raises your self-esteem, something you probably need when you just broke up a relationship.

Having a new girlfriend can be a distraction and a way for your ex to try to feel happy and navigate the breakup with you. When this happens, it is most likely that this new relationship will not last, because it is not a true solution to the pain. It’s just a temporary relief.

2. He is afraid of being alone

The fear of loneliness is one of the most common. Although the healthiest thing is to face it and learn from it, many choose a new partner because they don’t know how to be without someone by their side.

Your ex may be afraid of feeling abandoned and feel like they will never find anyone else to share their life with. If this is so, he is likely to pounce on the first person who shows him affection, to try to escape the fear of feeling permanently alone.

Getting a new partner to escape fear is not healthy. It is a way of using the new partner to feel better in a selfish way, without solving the origin of their fears.

Also read our guide on the 25 secrets to overcome loneliness

3. He really fell in love

It may be difficult to read, but you shouldn’t rule out the possibility that your ex has found love again.

Their relationship could have been very important for both of them, but perhaps it was not their destiny. Love comes when you don’t expect it. If so, you can be sure that his intention is not to hurt you, but he must follow the calling of his heart.

What do I do if my ex is with someone else and it hurts me?

It is normal. That pain is part of the breakup, it arises when one feels displaced, forgotten and replaced by the person they loved.

The important thing is to manage those feelings and not convince yourself that they are a reality. The situation is more complex and your ex’s new relationship is not about you, nor does it in any way reflect what you had.

It is essential that you understand that it does not depend on you nor can you do anything to change it. You must move on and focus on your life.

To achieve this you must face reality, even if it hurts. Their current relationship demonstrates several things:

a) The relationship they had is no longer their priority

It is possible that your new relationship is a way to improve yourself or avoid loneliness. Regardless of your reasons, the truth is that you are already in a new relationship and, therefore, what you shared is in the step and is not your main focus.

In this sense, their position may be selfish because it does not respect their grief or yours. But that’s not up to you and it’s something you have to deal with if you want to get over the breakup.

If he has moved on (even if it is a relationship that will later end), you should focus on moving forward and turning the page too. Don’t pay any more attention to it. What they had is already over.

b) Being with someone else is not impossible, even if you think it is

It’s possible that one of the reasons you’re so surprised that your ex has a new girlfriend is because you feel like you couldn’t move on.

Maybe you still see your relationship as something very important and believe that you should respect it, even after it has broken up.

The truth is that it is time to move on, you must go through your grief and allow yourself to move forward if the opportunity presents itself. The important thing is to value what that relationship left you, the learning, but also pay attention to your future alone.

Remember that many couples fail because one of them is unable to get over their ex. If you cling to the memory of her, when another person approaches you who wants to offer you her love, you will not be able to value it. You will be busy missing what you had and you may miss a good opportunity.

My ex is with someone else and I want him back

Now that you think you have found the reasons that answer that question “why does my ex have a girlfriend so quickly”?, which tormented you, you may have decided to go back to him and get him back.

It is important that you reflect on whether this is the best option you have and whether the things that separated you can be resolved. If so and you are determined, then take these tips:

Also read our guide on how to get your ex boyfriend back forever with this plan

a) Give it time

Patience works miracles. If you think that your ex is in the process of wanting to heal her wounds in any way and that is why he got a new girlfriend, it is likely that he will later want to return to you because that new relationship is only a temporary relief.

But you need to give it time and give yourself time. Both must heal their wounds, reevaluate what separated them and begin to miss each other. With the conflict that led to the breakup so close, it is difficult for him to want to come back if you pressure him.

b) Go out with other guys

This is the most basic advice, because it very rarely fails. If you want to get a guy’s attention, appeal to his jealousy.

Give him the opportunity to meet other men and let him see that you are an attractive person, that others also value. If he sees that you are as willing to move on as he seems, he may become afraid of losing you permanently and come back to you.

c) Talk to him

This is a risky strategy, but honesty is always the best tool.

Be clear with your ex about your intentions, your feelings, and your desire to get back together with him. A healthy conversation may be all that’s missing for him to consider the possibility of reconciliation.

If the feelings are real, you will both feel the urge to return.

Don’t neglect yourself

Whatever the outcome of this story, remember that you must be your top priority. Stop asking yourself “why does my ex have a girlfriend so quickly?” and start focusing on your own goals and desires.

Focusing on your life project will always make you at peace with yourself and with any relationship you are in. The happier you are with yourself, the better you will do in the field of love.

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