Why do I feel like no one cares about me?

“Why do I feel like no one cares about me?” . Becoming aware of this idea is little more than an emotional slap, it is being plunged into a state of absolute restlessness and that type of corrosive loneliness that shakes the psychic balance. Likewise, there is no more destructive thought than that of someone who does not feel loved, appreciated or valued.

What can be done in the face of this reality? First of all, When someone tells us this phrase it is necessary to evaluate the reality of the situation. This inevitably involves delving into the possibility that whoever makes this statement to us is suffering from a depressive disorder. These negative ideas permeated by bitter hopelessness are undoubtedly a reflection of this condition.

On the other hand, we cannot deny the evidence either. We are a society sick with loneliness and this feeling increases every year, both in older people and in the younger generations. Feeling that no one cares about us is the lament of those who lack a valid, close and meaningful social network. We analyze it.

Why do I feel like no one cares about me?

When someone asks themselves “Why do I feel like no one cares about me?”What he experiences is great suffering. And, in the face of this, we cannot turn our faces. It’s more, Sometimes this comment can be especially painful for those who do love, appreciate and value the person who is expressing this idea out loud.. Instead of getting angry or reproaching him for something, we must become aware of several things.

The first is that that person may be going through a difficult time. The second is that this feeling, far from being unfounded, is real and the environment is not acting correctly. It is necessary, therefore, to analyze the entire context, to be brave to highlight facts that we may be neglecting.

Fragile bonds and the feeling of real loneliness

The University of Pennsylvania conducted a study in 2016 to assess what we mean by feeling loved. The results showed great variability in what it is like for people to feel loved, respected and validated. However, there were common factors:

Don’t feel uncertainty. Perceiving that affection is constant, that there are no ups and downs and times in which we are appreciated and moments in which we are ignored, is an essential factor. Another element is communication: being told what we mean to someone offers us security. .

However, one of the reasons why I feel like no one cares about me is because I have fragile ties. Example of this is the family that says they love us, but is not there when we need it. Friends who judge more than support. Couples that don’t last or that simply make us feel alone despite having them around.

The weight of unattended traumas

There are many people who carry the mark of psychological trauma and this increases the perception of loneliness. Pain that is not managed, treated and managed makes it difficult to establish strong bonds.

What’s more, sometimes a lot is demanded of a relationship, it is done in a desperate attempt to soothe yesterday’s wounds with current ties, and that doesn’t always work.

The permanent feeling of loneliness is a common occurrence in people with post-traumatic stress disorder. Studiessuch as the one carried out at the University of Tilburg (Netherlands), support this fact.

The depression that you don’t see, but that is there

If you have been wondering for a while “Why do I feel like no one cares about me? You may be dealing with depression.. However, people are not always aware of it, we become familiar with suffering and scab over it. We carry those emotions full of frustration, sadness, bitterness and loneliness in silence for months without acting.

It is important to know what the symptoms associated with depression are, to take the step and request professional help:

Loss of motivation and pleasure (anhedonia). We stop enjoying what we were previously passionate about or interested in. Physical exhaustion.Sleep disturbances: insomnia or sleeping excessively. Feelings of anger, frustration and hopelessness. Feelings of loneliness and guilt at the same time.Need for insulation.Thoughts loaded with negativity.

Why do I feel like no one cares about me? The voice of low self-esteem

When we hear someone say “no one cares about me” which is evident, at times, is a negative self-perception. Simply put, those who do not appreciate or value themselves do not feel deserving of affection either. This devaluation of oneself can reach problematic extremes in which one may even believe that one is not worthy of being loved.

Low self-esteem is, in most cases, the cause of many relationships, because With it comes insecurity and a good number of irrational beliefs. with which to boycott all ties.

What can I do when I have this feeling?

When we ask ourselves “why do I feel like no one cares about me?” There is a feeling behind that we must deal with. The first thing is to clarify what motivates it, what is really happening in me and in my life to experience this very exhausting reality.

If my problem is loneliness and lack of meaningful relationships, I may be forced to make changes. Nowadays, and thanks to new technologies, we can meet people with similar tastes. Let’s look for relationships that are enriching and sincere. Let’s be aware that We are people worthy of authentic love, of being valued, cared for and recognized.. If the figures around us now bring us more snubs than certainties, more problems than moments, happy perhaps we should make decisions. In addition to attending to the quality of our relationships, It is essential that we pay attention to our self-esteem. The person who values ​​and appreciates himself feels worthy not only of being loved, but of receiving the best love possible.

Last, but not least, if the fact of feeling that we are not important to anyone is a constant (despite having people who appreciate us) It is essential that we seek expert help. Sometimes, the shadow of unresolved traumas or hidden depressions completely distort the vision we have of ourselves.