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Learn from your mistakes

When faced with a mistake we can judge ourselves, criticize ourselves and sink. Or we can take the great opportunity we are given to get to know ourselves better and change course.

Written and verified by the psychologist Elena Sanz.

Throughout life you will face difficult moments, situations in which you will take a wrong path.. You are human and, therefore, you will have failures and setbacks. However, it will be the attitude you adopt in these circumstances that will define who you are and how you want to live. Learn from your mistakes and you will have conquered fear.

Some people have personal characteristics that make them more likely to suffer from failure. A perfectionist tendency, a rigid personality and a high intolerance of frustration are some of the main ingredients of the fear of failure. Excessive self-demand makes us live in a mental prison, in which our internal dialogue becomes the fiercest critic.

Those who do not allow themselves to make mistakes see their freedom limited. Each activity is a test, rather than an adventure. And every mistake, a great personal failure. The gripping fear of not measuring up leads the individual to stay in their comfort zone, and deprive themselves of the opportunity to experience the new.

Staying in a harmful place, in a painful situation, will be more acceptable to you than venturing to change course. Well, this would mean admitting that you have failed. AND Every mistake made is carried like a heavy burden that undermines our self-esteem, reminding us that we were not enough.

Error is an essential part of the path

It is essential to change the conception we have of error. We must get rid of that negative assessment, that association with failure or incompetence.. Error is part of the path of all of us, no one goes through life without making a mistake. But also, it is not only part of the path, but an essential element.

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Making mistakes is the first step to learning. The lesson obtained from a mistake is much more valuable and relevant than that which comes from good moments. Failing teaches us about ourselves and the world, it helps us clarify who we are, what we want and what we don’t. It shows us which actions lead us to happiness and which lead to frustration.

Failing an exam makes us aware of the need to update the syllabus or change our study methods. A breakup shows us what our interpersonal limits are and what we really want, need and deserve. Leaving a job that doesn’t make us happy leads us to work for our true passion.

Therefore, error will never be a failure, but rather a leap of great magnitude in wisdom and experience.. Suspension, divorce or being unemployed do not speak of your disability but of the journey you have already traveled, the work you have already done and the lessons you have already learned to reach your goals.

Learn from your mistakes

Therefore, if you change your perspective, your reality will change. Start seeing error as an ally and not as an enemyand you will find yourself getting closer to meeting your goals.

Accept mistakes as part of life. You have to remove perfectionist, rigid and inflexible conceptions from your mind. We all make mistakes, so do you. Therefore, accept it and allow yourself to fail, without fear and without guilt. Dare to try, explore, turn around and change course. Integrate error as part of existence and stop fearing it, do not allow it to condition you.Use error as an impulse and not as a burden. When you fail, analyze the situation and draw a lesson. It doesn’t hurt for you to suffer, it hurts for you to change. Therefore, evaluate what message the error brings you: what happened? What part was your responsibility? What could you have done differently? Surely now you know yourself better in terms of your desires, your needs and your limits. Anchor this learning in your mind.Take responsibility and forgive. It is important to recognize that we have a leading role in what happens to us and take charge of our actions. Placing ourselves in the role of victim leaves us powerless, adrift in the face of the circumstances and actions of others. Accepting mistakes brings us closer to change. In the same way, it is necessary to forgive the others involved and move on without resentment.Learn from your mistakes and apply the learnings in the future. Don’t be afraid to start over, you are no longer starting from scratch but from experience.Cultivate flexible thinking. To avoid making the same mistake, it is important that you look at other perspectives. This means doing things differently to obtain different results. If we do not make these changes, it is very likely that comfort zones will appear. Therefore, visualize the context from another point of view, so learning will be more enriching.Work on your emotional intelligence. There will be errors that affect more than others; those that have a greater impact tend to harm our emotionality. Therefore, the development of our emotional intelligence is vital to face and overcome the most difficult situations.Seek support. Talking about our failures and listening to others about theirs can help us learn from our mistakes, as it is an excellent way to change our current perspective and do things differently.You might be interested…

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Bonet, J.V. (1997). Be a friend to yourself: self-esteem manual (Vol. 36). Editorial Sal Terrae.Cordero Villafáfila, A., Ramos Brieva, JA, & Ramos Cordero, A. (2009). Frequency of anankastic symptoms in the general population. In Annals of Psychiatry (Vol. 25, No. 5, pp. 231-236).

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