The story of an ordinary girl

This is the story of an ordinary girl. A girl without a name because she can have many. A girl who fell in love with what she believed to be the best man in the world: a man from a storybook, a prince charming. In this way, she decided to become his princess.

To try to achieve it, she gave up her freedom, her ability to decide, her smile, her friends and her family. In exchange for what she thought was love, she gave her life: He put her at the mercy of the waves that only moved at the whim of a selfish heart that thought it could possess everything, even people.

Meet

It was just another day at the office, she was at her table quietly doing her work until a colleague approached to inform her of the news. Our girl used to ignore the comments. She knew that her classmates tended to be exaggerated and that gossip and speculation were usually more a product of novelty than reality.

When she saw it she realized she was wrong. He was a dark boy with hazel eyes and a captivating smile. He wasn’t just any guy, he was the perfect man.. And that perfect boy turns out to be coming home on the same subway line. And that’s how they met.

Fell in love

Falling in love is not a conscious act, it is a sensation that intoxicates you little by little. A sensation that begins with the illusion of meeting someone who catches your eye, but who little by little conquers your heart. The eyes can deceive you, but the heart is always authentic.

The perfect boy also noticed her and didn’t take long to ask for her phone number. I was waiting for her to take the subway together, fearing that at some point during the trip she might need him and he wouldn’t be there. And then he asked her on a date. He was very romantic, so much so that everything around him seemed like a dream.

Some days, shortly after saying goodbye, he wrote messages to our girl as if in her absence he saw the end of the world reflected. It was all sweetness and love. He hugged her when he said goodbye to her, writing in that space in which the two contracted what he was going to miss her. She felt like the luckiest woman in the world because of all the women in it, he had chosen her.

Jealousy and isolation

My best friend sometimes worries about the messages he writes to me, she says that At the bottom of his words there is an anxiety that he does not like. I think it’s really romantic that he wants to be in contact with me all the time. He is my knight errant and I think that if he knows where I am, he can rescue me from any danger.

The other day he got a little jealous because he saw me talking to another classmate, but this was nothing more than another of his demonstrations of love, of how important I am to him. He asked me if I like him, because I was laughing with him like when he met me and we were laughing together. He may have been flirting without meaning to, so I promised him that I won’t show myself so openly again. I don’t want to lose him, nor for him to be upset… With everything he takes care of me!

Yesterday he called me and the phone was busy, I was talking to my best friend, but he got jealous again because he thought I might be talking to someone else. Maybe he starts to be a little controlling, but he is so kind and good and he does it because he loves me so much, that I can’t help but forgive him. If he cares so much about me, it means he loves me a lot. If he always wants to have me so close, he’s not going to leave me.

My friend is angry because she doesn’t understand his attitude. The perfect guy told me it’s because she’s jealous, she doesn’t have anyone who loves her. He says that she is a bad influence on me and that she puts strange things in my head. It may be true that she is jealous, she worries me that the two of them won’t get along.

Last night I went out with my friends. He got angry, He called me a whore, said I had a lot of cleavage and was very dressed up., as if he were provoking or looking for another, and that I don’t get on with him as much anymore. Maybe my clothes were a little daring and I can understand why it bothered him. I don’t want to lose him and even less because of something stupid like this.

My friends don’t have a partner and maybe they can dress like that, but I already have one and I can’t disrespect him like that. Besides, if he did it I’d probably be angry too. They have to understand that I can’t go out like that again and if they don’t, they are not my real friends.

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The fear

I’m afraid of losing him. He gets angry more and more ofteneach time its demands are greater, its susceptibility more dermal. He doesn’t like how I dress, or how I smile at other people. He doesn’t want me to wear a skirt or a low neckline, even though he knew me that way himself.

He has even told me that I love him little compared to how much he loves me. How can I make him understand that he is my prince charming? I’m just an ordinary girl full of fear of losing the perfect boy that was my lot. I’d be stupid to let him walk away in the end, when I was really lucky to find him. Someone as imperfect as me, with someone as good as him.

Today I yelled at him in the street, he says I’m a slut. He scolded me for talking to the clerk at a shoe store and for laughing at a joke he made to me. She was being nice, I had no intention of flirting, and I did it in a restrained way because I knew she was watching me. He has reproached me for making him “a fool” in the middle of the street, but the truth is that he doesn’t understand why he gets like that with me.

I wish I could tell all this to someone. I need to talk about it, but it has made me distance myself from the people I trusted, kicking them out of my life with false and disproportionate recriminations and accusations.

Besides, I don’t want to make him angry. I’m a little lost. I guess this is love, it’s loving someone so much that the fear of losing them leads you to these crazy things., even though he knows that he is not right. I don’t know, maybe I don’t know what it is to truly love.

The aggressiveness

I have been scared, I have felt fear and that has not even hurt me, It hasn’t touched me. She knocked over the table and slammed the door very violently and I was left shaking. We were arguing again because she saw me talking to my boss, it was work stuff. He doesn’t understand it anymore.

I don’t know what to do. I love him and I am lucky that someone so perfect loves me. But I fear their violent attacks, I don’t want us to get hurt. Maybe I should leave work so that he can be calmer, totally, now we live together and we both don’t need to earn money.

Is this love?

This is not love, it is manipulation, control and dependency. No one has the right to tell you how to dress or wear makeup or who to talk to. No one has the right to make you tremble with fear for being aggressive, even if they don’t touch you.

What I describe here is a scene of psychological abuse. There are no blows here, but they can come later. The beatings come when a random girl depends so much on the aggressor and is so convinced that she is doing something wrong, that it is impossible for her to reveal herself to them.

There may even never be physical violence, as we see it may not be necessary. She’s alone, at his mercy, she’ll do what he says. She will stop being her and become totally dependent on him. She has managed to control her, she does not need to mark her so that she clings to him more.

This is the story of any girl, you can choose a name for her, unfortunately in reality she has many. It could be your sister, your friend or your neighbor. It can be any girl who thinks she is in love but is actually being controlled and humiliated.

Don’t close your eyes, help him see reality far from his thinking scheme. Even if he wants to throw you out of his life, don’t walk away. Although sometimes you witness him approaching the precipice, do not think that it is his fault, remind him that he can count on you. Convince her to call 016 -in Spain or the corresponding number in your country-, she needs help to get out of there and if you leave her alone she won’t be able to.

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