The 7 best quotes from Carl Rogers

Carl Rogers’ quotes talk about control of destiny, experience and personal growth, as well as the value of people and our relationships with others.

Since the 1950s, Carl Rogers has become an eminence of the humanistic approach to psychology. His best publications are “Client-centered therapy” (1951) and “On becoming a person” (1961).

Along with Abraham Maslow, he was a psychologist who gave great importance to personal development. Especially, Many of Carl Rogers’ quotes help people reflect on their own existence. That is why we have compiled his best sentences.

Empathy, a frequent theme in Carl Rogers’ quotes

“Being empathetic is seeing the world through the eyes of another and not seeing our world reflected in their eyes.”

Empathy is a fundamental concept in the perspective of Carl Rogers, In fact, it is considered one of the basic attitudes that a person has to develop to achieve self-realization.

However, Being empathetic for Carl Rogers is not putting yourself in the other’s place from your own vision but from theirs. Empathy requires a deep exercise of reflection and knowledge about how the other observes and experiences the world around them.

Empathy is not only what you would do in the other’s situation, but how you would act in their situation taking into account their vision of life.

Direct experience as a priority

“Neither the Bible, nor the prophets, nor the revelations of God or men. Nothing takes priority over direct experience.”

This is one of Carl Rogers’ phrases that perhaps creates the most controversy or at least invites reflection. With it he wants to highlight the importance of The most important guide for each of us is not in others, not even in a current of thought or religion, but within ourselves.
Rogers establishes the ultimate authority in one’s own experience. Although he also considers that the judgments of others have to be listened to but cannot serve as a guide. Thus, any human being must be treated as a unique person, worthy of respect, with the right to evaluate his or her experience in his or her own way, and with broad powers of autonomous choice.

Acceptance as an impulse to change

“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself as I am, then I can change.”

For Rogers, acceptance is the foundation of change. If this does not exist, it is not possible to change because the mind is lost. Thus, observing what we are and knowing ourselves is the key to improving and evolving.

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The value of being yourself

“I feel happier just being myself and letting others be themselves.”

Carl Rogers thinks people are as beautiful as sunsets, if they are allowed to be. That is to say, appreciates sincerity and authenticity above all; the natural state of each of us.

Rogers has found through his relationships that in the long run, it doesn’t help to act like you’re something you’re not. We cannot be happy if we show ourselves as we are not because we are rejecting ourselves.

Admitting feelings

“It is not about removing the feeling from the mind, nor hiding it in it, but about experiencing it with acceptance.”

When we experience any feeling, the appropriate action is to accept it, not evade it or repress it. The feeling must be given shelter to know what it is telling us. What is the message it carries. Only in this way will we be able to know others and know ourselves.

Tolerance to uncertainty

“I realize that if I were stable, prudent and static, I would live in death. Therefore, I accept confusion, uncertainty, fear, and emotional ups and downs. Because that is the price I am willing to pay for a fluid, perplexing and exciting life.”

Fear and uncertainty are companions in our lives. Not everything is controllable or predictable, or even safe. Confusion will occur as well as emotional ups and downs and we have to be prepared for it.

Maintaining the idea that we can control everything that happens around us comes from the fear of not knowing how to react to what happens. It is the result of insecurity. And even if it is possible to do it, sometimes we act as if it were, creating a rigid mentality that imprisons us.

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If we want to live in fluidity we have to learn to let go to make way for flexibility and enjoyment.

Learn to learn

“The man who is educated is the one who learns to learn.”

Carl Rogers understood an educated person as someone who tried to learn and change. Self-knowledge and self-realization walk hand in hand along the path of life. He who educates himself is he who informs himself, reflects, questions himself and commits to learning.

As we see, Carl Rogers’ legacy is a great source of knowledge that aims to help people. In his first years as a professional he always asked himself the same question: how can I treat, cure or change this person? But experience changed the way I asked this question: How can I provide a relationship that this person can use for his or her own personal growth?

His numerous contributions to psychotherapy and his innovative vision of therapeutic practice remain alive today. There are many theories that he developed, but without a doubt knowing the best phrases of Carl Rogers helps us understand his way of thinking and leads us to reflect.