Happiness is wherever you want

That state of pleasure that intoxicates us in specific situations is happiness. Everyone wants to achieve it, know what the secret is to achieve it and experience it for as long as possible. If we could, human beings would try to be happy all the time, but this is nothing more than an idealization without foundation or basis in reality. Happiness is not a specific emotional state, it is a way of life.

Clearly, it is not the situation, the context or what you have to experience that determines whether you feel more or less happy. Happiness is not born from any achievement, from a partner, from a child or from a house on the beach.. Being happy means having a very well-equipped value system, focusing on the present moment, loving ourselves unconditionally and knowing how to appreciate what we have.

Everything we just listed goes hand in hand. Thus, if we make an effort to change our philosophy of life, which in many of us is quite complaining, and adopt this cheerful view of life, we will realize how We can find happiness exactly where we want.

Happiness is not found, it is built

Happiness does not have to be sought because it does not exist anywhere that requires searching. That is, it is not out there as we are often led to believe. In some way, the society in which we have had to live has distorted the compass that leads us to happiness. So, instead of pointing outward, as they would have us believe, happiness is within. External ‘happiness’ is only fleeting pleasant moments.

If this were so, there would be two types of people: those who lead an enviable life and are happy and those who lack everything and are unhappy. But the reality is not this. And we go further: even those who have the least, sometimes, are the happiest. Why would it be?

I don’t like to generalize, but it usually coincides that People who have become accustomed to living with less, in turn, end up needing less. The consequence is that your attention is more directed to small pleasures. than to those gratifications that are ephemeral.

This is why psychological fulfillment is born from within the person. We are wrong if we think that when we get what we think we need, then we will be happy. If you are not happy with what you have, you will hardly be happy when you get it. What you want is an extra. It will give you a surge of joy that will last a few hours, a few days, maybe weeks… then you will return to your normal state.

How can I become a happier person?

The first step you need to take to feel more happiness is precisely not to look for that happiness. When we demand of ourselves that “we must be happy” and we fail to be happy, we become frustrated. and frustration is not exactly synonymous with happiness. Furthermore, obsessing about being happy fills us with anxiety and despair and ends up becoming a struggle.

To be happy, leaves aside absolutist needs. The truth is that we need few things to be healthy: a little food – not too much or the pleasure will become aversion or attachment -, a little water to hydrate us, a roof to protect us, physical activity to avoid getting sick, having some goal that encourages us to get up every morning -but without focusing on the result-, sleep, breathe and little else.

Everything we think we need comes out of all this and causes us to be unhappier.. This does not mean that we also find pleasure in it, but they must only be desires, not needs. Believing that we have to have it, no matter what the cost, makes us anxious and if we achieve it and finally lose it, since everything in this life is ephemeral, we become depressed.

Happiness from Buddhist psychology

Buddhist Psychology affirms that happiness lies within us. As Lama Rinchen, teacher of Tibetan Buddhism, says, Happiness is an internal state of peace, serenity and tranquility. Nothing to do with our conception of happiness. Rinchen affirms that we go from one peak of joy to another. For example, one day we bought a good cell phone, but after a short time we needed to buy something else. However, for Buddhism these are only superfluous moments of pleasure since they are ephemeral and do not report any type of inner change.

Thus, happiness, from Buddhism, is a state of internal stillness. A state that, no matter what happens out there, we do not give it the power to influence us. In this way, Buddhism affirms that happiness is in our hands and not in what happens outside. Without a doubt, these are very deep types of teachings that require time and practice to achieve.

Changing your scale of values ​​is a good way to start. Don’t focus so much on work, on finding a partner, on money, on success. When you are about to die you will not remember this. What you will remember are the experiences you had with your friends, the moments with your family.the coffee you had in the middle of the afternoon watching the sea or the sound of your dog’s breathing when you were reading a good book.

May your priority be love: towards yourself, life and others. If you are able to love the simple, the human and the small details, then you will be happy. Do you dare to put it into practice?

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