Stalkear: Here’s Why Playing Sherlock Holmes Isn’t Cool

Are you curious to know how your crush’s trip was or take a peek into your ex’s life? Or find out about what the idol likes to do and kill that curiosity about who the person you bumped into on the internet is? All this is popularly known as stalking.

The word comes from the verb in English to stalk which, loosely translated, means to pursue something or someone. Know how to identify to what extent this practice is just to kill curiosity and when it becomes an alert for disorders, such as obsession.

Is stalking normal?

Considering how social networks work, whose main functions include following other users, starting a friendship and enjoying each other’s activities, following the posts is within the foreseen activities.

In addition, just viewing the page out of curiosity or to seek some information that will be useful for both you and the person being stalked and that will not interfere with their behavior, causing suffering and frustration, can indeed be healthy.

When it’s not normal anymore

The consequences of stalking can have serious consequences. Viewing and following the posts becomes a problem when it leaves the virtual and reaches the real. Such as, for example, taking advantage of the information visualized to satisfy your interests that bring harm to the other.
Still, this is characterized as an annoyance of the privacy of others and can have more serious effects when used as an instrument to intimidate or harass a person, being this attitude appropriate for criminal proceedings. Note that even though some social networks are public, they still have a privacy limit. In addition, this habit is also harmful to the person who practices it.

Be alert: stalking can bring you harm

Some types of behaviors can help us understand if we are facing a problem such as compulsion. Psychologist Fernanda Félix Barbosa, CRP 08/28120, lists four main characteristics for you to pay attention to:

• Letting go of your important commitments and tasks: Giving up your own activities in order to imitate someone else’s actions based on what you found on social media or search pages can be harmful. This is because the individual starts to put the tasks of a third party above his own.
• Repetition: Entering the same person’s social media at an exacerbated frequency can be harmful.
• Dependency: being in contact with the person’s social network is what satisfies him, only. Common, especially when there have already been emotional bonds involved in the relationship.
• Difficulty concentrating on other activities: Harmful behavior can be preventing you from concentrating on activities. This is a consequence of always thinking about what someone else is doing or posting about.

Finally, it is important to note that we are not offering diagnoses, this is just an alert for you to pay attention to your behaviors. If you feel that you fit into this situation, we recommend that you seek professional help from a psychologist.

Always look for the best for you

We’ve separated three videos with discussions that will help you understand more about the consequences of stalking. You will also find some suggestions on how to redirect your attention.

1. I’m just going to take a peek…

This video talks about stalking an ex, and how to leave that habit behind. Janaina Campos is an Integral Systemic Coach and clarifies doubts focused on relationships.

2. All that glitters is not gold!

In this video, youtuber Lully exposes examples of how stalking can be an arbitrary act. This is because we leave aside what really happens in real life and stick only to what is portrayed in the networks.

3. Take care of yourself!

The psychologist explains the term orbiting, which, loosely translated, means to orbit. In this case, the term refers to the act of “surrounding” the social networks of the person you are stalking. This can generate anguish, frustration and suffering.

It is always necessary to keep in mind that social networks are just a part of a person’s life, and do not represent everything they are. Posts can be just fleeting moments or even liars. So always have your mental health as a priority. So, if you feel the need, seek professional help to prevent it from getting in the way of your life and that of other people.

A good way to direct your attention to other things is to meet different people and get interested in new activities.