How To Move On While Loving Your Ex |

It is common to meet people separated from their loved ones for years, but who continue to maintain frequent contact with them, even if only by phone or internet. Not that I think it’s wrong to be friends with your ex, if that’s healthy. The problem is when this connection reveals a great difficulty in moving forward, as if you accept living “a half relationship” just for fear of starting a new one and suffering.

This type of situation usually happens to people who cannot be happy together, even though they love each other. Then, when separation becomes inevitable, they pull away physically but not emotionally. Thus, even though they no longer see each other, touch each other or live under the same roof, they continue to do favors for the other, meddling in their ex’s life, worrying about what he does, or simply following their day to day from afar. that was once your love.

The downsides of this type of relationship are that you want to continue doing what a partner does, without, however, actually being that person’s partner. That is, they want to have the benefits (receiving affection, attention, support, help), without assuming the responsibilities (being present, sharing bills, making big decisions). So imagine what confusion this doesn’t cause in your mind, in the other person’s mind and in future suitors who might be interested in you? After all, how can new people enter this closed club? And, entering, how will they compete with someone who is much more intimate than them? It is not uncommon for the new partner to be left out when a problem arises, as the strongest tendency is for the person to seek out their ex to confide in or seek advice.

From an energetic point of view, staying connected to your ex does not allow you to end the relationship, making the separation meaningless, in addition to showing selfishness and attachment on your part. After all, if you no longer want to live with that person, why do you keep them close, “on hand”, as if it were a guarantee? Why do you get your hopes up for a future comeback just because you’re afraid of ending up alone?

You have to free yourself and the other if you really want to be happy. Distancing does not mean giving up or abandoning, but allowing the new to emerge.

You have to free yourself and the other if you really want to be happy. Distancing does not mean giving up or abandoning, but allowing the new to emerge.

What I mean is that letting your ex free doesn’t prevent you from having a new chance in the future. Especially because it is the real distance that will make each one work on their emotional problems and become better people for a second attempt or a new love.

Thus, keeping the ex close just out of fear will not help them to have this impulse for renewal. You will simply continue to be the same people and keep old habits, running the serious risk of becoming stagnant. So if the point of separation was to move forward and evolve, then living the same life doesn’t seem very smart.