31 tricks to be more sociable and fun –

In this article we will explain the best tricks on how to be more sociable. These tips will help you in all aspects of your life, they will make you understand that being social and having a lot of friends is not a goal that you must meet to satisfy others, but rather yourself.

1. Memorize four universal questions to facilitate conversations

One of the things that will help you be more sociable is knowing how to break the ice to start a conversation with someone.

Although there is a huge variety of topics to use, these four questions will help you in any social gathering:

How are you? How did you meet those who are here? Where are you from? What do you do?

Don’t do them all at once. Use them wisely when you feel like you’ve run out of ideas to talk about.

This way, it will be easier to make small talk and people will see you as friendly.

2. Wisely define social rituals

What do we mean by this? If you incorporate some rituals that force you to socialize into your daily routine, you will meet new people and develop the skill of being comfortable among a group of people.

Set aside at least an hour each week to do an activity that involves meeting new people: go to the gym, sign up for a class, or go to a park to exercise. Choose an activity that you like and you will enjoy the moment even more.

Another ritual that you can put into practice is that, at least twice a week, you take 30 minutes to call or write a message to your friends or people you just met to meet up to do something fun.

In this way, you will be making socializing with people a habit and it will become easier and more natural for you.

3. Make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons

It’s okay if you don’t like hanging out at a club every night or you don’t accept all those event invitations on Facebook.

You are not obligated to meet the expectations of others and that includes how you spend your free time. If you’re not sure, ask yourself the following:

Are you looking to spend time with that person or do you really want to go to that event on your own? Do you feel guilty for letting others judge you and label you as antisocial? Will meeting that person or the event bring you happiness?

While it is true that feeling close to other people has its benefits, it is important that it is always on your own terms and that the contact makes you feel good both physically and psychologically.

4. Start a short conversation

Believe it or not, every friendship you manage to establish will always start with a short conversation.

This type of talk has its purpose: to provide time for two people to get to know each other and feel comfortable in each other’s company.

During this brief communication you must take care of your personal appearance, your body language and your verbal language. Because? In those minutes, unconsciously, the other person will define what relationship they will have with you and will get an idea of ​​your personality.

Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. Show yourself how you are and feel confident in yourself.

Also read our guide on how to start a conversation with anyone

5. Look for common interests to extend the conversation

After the initial contact with the short conversation, you will have an idea of ​​what kind of person he is and what his interests might be. Analyze what points they may have in common and ask them about it.

For example, if you feel that the person you are talking to likes literature and you like it too, you can tell them that you have started a new novel and that they know it. Regardless of their response, you will have managed to get their attention and extend the conversation.

6. Use the 1/3 rule

It consists of saying yes to at least a third of the events that invite you. It’s not about the event itself.

The point is to get out of your comfort zone with small steps to be able to master a social life and be surrounded by people who make your life more pleasant. As you get more comfortable around people, you can increase this rule to 2/3.

7. Understand that only you have expectations for the way you act

The reason you are not sociable is because you think too much that others will judge and criticize every word you say or everything you do.

You are not doing a work or exposing an article. Be casually friendly and let things flow without thinking so much about “what people will say.” Allow yourself to be who you genuinely are. In the world there are people with the same interests and points of view as you.

Don’t force yourself to be energetic, proactive, super friendly, or condescending. Don’t try to act or pretend to be what you are not. What is natural attracts and that is a point in your favor to be more sociable.

8. 20 minute rule

It consists of allowing you to leave the place after 20 minutes if you do not feel comfortable. The important thing is to break the pattern of not socializing and you have already achieved that if you have attended the place.

When you notice that you can leave the event after a while without having to impress others, then it will become much easier for you to say yes to any invitation.

As you get more comfortable and get a better handle on being social, gradually increase this time until you no longer feel the need to use this rule.

9. Join clubs you like

If you want to make friends, groups and clubs are the places par excellence to do so. Because? There you will find people with your same interests and values.

For example, if you do not have a hobby in particular, but you are a very religious person, go to a temple and observe or ask about the groups that meet on the weekends. You will surely find one that you like.

In addition to leaving your house and meeting people with the same values, it will be much easier for you to start a conversation with someone who has the same interests as you.

10. Go to places where the same people go regularly

To make friends, it is important that you see them at least once a week. This way, you will have enough time to get to know them and create a connection.

This means that classes, gym, and recurring events are better than one-time events like parties.

11. If you feel like you need it, take a break from social life

We understand that not being naturally social, attending events and leaving your comfort zone frequently can be exhausting both physically and mentally, so it is good to take a break from time to time.

For example, if you have attended five events in a week, you can take a break from social life over the weekend. This way, you will be fully energized to continue with your goal of being sociable.

The second solution we give you, in case you don’t want to stop your pace to achieve your goal faster, is to take a five-minute break away from the group of people.

You can go to the bathroom to breathe or go out to the balcony to admire the stars in complete solitude. This way, you don’t stop your pace, but you do give your mind and body a break from being outside the comfort zone. Then you return to the event as if nothing had happened.

Recommendation: Attend an event at a coffee shop

If you absolutely feel like you shouldn’t give your social life a break, visit a coffee shop. Why this place? There is coffee, tea and sweets. It is a good option to start a conversation and feel energized with food or drink.

In case you don’t feel up to talking to anyone, at least you will have left your house and you will be fulfilling your routine of leaving your comfort zone.

12. Lose the fear of saying stupid things

It is better to say something stupid than to say nothing. Perhaps the fear of saying “nonsense” is what stops you from being sociable. And believe it or not, it is more harmful to say nothing than to speak up and say something stupid from time to time.

Because? It is human to make mistakes when choosing words to communicate, but if you don’t speak, you eliminate the possibility of others connecting with you.

When was the last time you judged someone for saying something stupid? You probably don’t remember it, and if you do, I also assure you that it didn’t stop you from continuing to talk to that person.

But you do have to remember the one who was next to you and didn’t speak anything. That’s because she made you feel like she didn’t like you. Other people feel the same way and that is why it is better to lose your fear of saying something stupid than to keep your words to yourself.

Also read our guide on how to stop being insecure: 10 things you have to remember

13. Show interest when meeting someone

Here’s something you might not know: being sociable is not being an interesting person, it’s showing interest in what the other person has to say.

If you notice, people who talk about themselves all the time end up being boring or annoying after a while. But those people who show interest in others become interesting to their interlocutors.

Be a good listener while striking a balance between listening and speaking. Ask questions with sincerity and curiosity to get to know the other person during that person’s pauses, give small details about yourself to enrich the conversation and achieve connection.

14. Remember that there are many people like you

Surely you have ever thought that you don’t want to be sociable because people are stupid and no one understands you. However, this only keeps you from meeting people who have the same point of view as you.

It is true that there are people who are stupid, but not everyone is. Always remind yourself that there are tons of great people you can meet and the only way to do that is by taking the initiative to get out of your house and comfort zone.

Don’t feel unmotivated if on the first few occasions you don’t find someone you like. Keep trying until you feel comfortable with a group of people.

15. Appear warm and relaxed

If you try to be too friendly with people and are too nervous, you will look needy and uncomfortable. Although being distant does not work to make friends either, since you will give the feeling that no one likes you.

You must balance between being warm and appearing relaxed. When you achieve the perfect balance, then you will notice how people are attracted to you.

By relaxed we mean speaking calmly with a soft but clear tone of voice, fluid and confident body language. We understand that nerves can play tricks on you, but act relaxed until you believe it.

And by warm we mean that you smile without exaggerating, that you speak honestly, that you show appreciation and interest and give compliments when you think it is necessary. In other words, make others feel that you like them.

16. Stop judging yourself so harshly

If you feel like people judge you, it’s not because they do, it’s because your subconscious is judging you.

For example, if you have a pimple on your face and you think that people will only notice that, you are actually the one judging yourself for having a pimple on your face. Work on your self-esteem and you will see how those stigmas disappear.

How to achieve good self-esteem faster? Working it! As? Go to a therapist, accept yourself as you are, be proud of yourself, treat yourself as if you were your best…