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Why am I sad if my life is good?

You have everything to be happy: family, friends, work… And yet, there is that constant sadness, that apathy that makes no sense in anything. Why do we get depressed if there are no significant shortcomings in our lives?

You have a good job, financial security, people you love and who love you. You have a wonderful family and friends who are always there. However, you notice that there is something wrong, something that distorts everything and forces you to ask yourself almost continuously: Why am I sad if my life is good…

You are not the only one. The perception that one should be happy because everything around them is favorable, and yet they are not happy, is a common experience. It is a tremendous existential contradiction often mediated by latent depression. However, people are like that, we want to find meaning in everything, we look for an objective explanation for everything.

We must assume that mental health problems do not always have a clear origin. In this way, and when it comes to depression, it is very common for many of us to drift into that abyss without knowing very well what prompted us to get there.

And when this happens, we feel angry with ourselves for not being happy when we should be…

“The sadness of the soul can kill you much faster than a bacteria.”

-John Steinbeck-

Reasons why you are sad if your life is good

Why am I sad if my life is good? If we do a search on the Internet, we will discover that this is a question that frequently appears on forums or social networks. People ask questions like: “ Why have I been diagnosed with depression if I have no reason to be sad?” “What is wrong with me that I am not able to appreciate the good things around me?”

We still don’t understand the anatomy of mood disorders. We continue to assume that depression is a form of sadness and, above all, we place the exclusive responsibility of creating their own mental health problem on the human being.

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“If you have anxiety it is because you are too intense and you don’t know how to take life any other way,” “s If you suffer from depression it is because you are weak, lazy and do not know how to appreciate the good that surrounds you.. These reasonings are dangerous and further fuel the feeling of guilt of those who deal with a psychological disorder.. We must understand that depression is a condition in which multiple factors come together and not all of them are under our control.

Having everything is not always synonymous with happiness and well-being

You can have the best job in the world and a wonderful partner, but not be happy. And feeling it this way is legal, but we have to discover what is the variable that fails, the element that promotes chaos. Because sometimes we assume that certain dimensions will make us happy because it is what is “socially expected.” When in reality, authentic well-being can start from other, less “normative” aspects.

If you have been wondering for a while why I am sad if my life is good, reflect on whether you really lead the life you want or are you missing something. Sometimes, Factors such as stress mean that even if we have valuable family and friends, we cannot enjoy them.. The lack of long-term purposes and goals also tends to blur our well-being, even if we have everything.

Being sad is a medical condition, not a choice

Nobody chooses their depression. No person voluntarily falls into a mood disorder. Depressions are conditions of multifactorial origin and not all of them are under our control. Those that can influence are the following:

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Neurological factors. Research work such as those carried out in the Department of Psychiatry at the Mount Sinai School of Medicine, in New York, affects neurobiological variables. Genes are an element that we must consider.Psychosocial adversity in childhood. When I ask myself why I am sad if my life is good, I must look back and remember what my childhood was like. Sometimes, even having a happy present, the weight of past trauma increases the risk of suffering from depression.Stress maintained over time. We may have it all, we may have a good house, financial stability, a partner we love… Now, going through stressful situations for several months in a row is a risk factor for depression.

The person who feels depressed “for no reason” when everything is going well in their life may be more reluctant to ask for help.

Don’t focus on what surrounds you, focus on what you feel

When someone has a good life, but feels sad, it shows double suffering. He feels guilty. Ungrateful even. Why am I wrong if my partner loves me and I have a good family? This setback makes asking for professional help take much longer, while navigating between shame, frustration and strangeness.

They hope that this bump will pass on its own, that it will just be a bad time. However, apathy, hopelessness and negative thoughts do not disappear, they intensify. It is important to ask for help when negative thoughts and emotional discomfort become a constant. Because Beyond what surrounds us, there is what we feel and that is the most relevant dimension.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Aan Het Rot M, Mathew SJ, Charney DS. Neurobiological mechanisms in major depressive disorder. CMAJ. 2009;180(3):305-313. doi:10.1503/cmaj.080697Cuijpers P, Sijbrandij M, Koole SL, Andersson G, Beekman AT, Reynolds CF 3rd. Adding psychotherapy to antidepressant medication in depression and anxiety disorders: a meta-analysis. World Psychiatry. 2014;13(1):56-67. doi:10.1002/wps.20089Zimmermann JJ, Tiellet Nunes ML, Fleck MP. How do depressed patients evaluate their quality of life? A qualitative study. J Patient Rep Outcomes. 2018;2(1):52. doi:10.1186/s41687-018-0076-z

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