When I think I’m not a good person

There are some situations that make us feel confused. That make us doubt whether we are good or bad people. Has it happened to you? Then this article is for you.

Have you ever believed that you are not a good person? Sometimes, We make mistakes that make us feel bad and guilt attacks us. Like when we hurt another for something we did or said, or when we stop helping someone by prioritizing other things. In these cases, we are likely to devalue ourselves and believe that we are the worst of the worst. However, not everything that goes wrong means that we are a bad person.

Believe me, If you’re thinking you’re a bad person, you’re probably on the path to not being one.. Well, bad people don’t believe they are. They simply act, always for their benefit, doing evil for no reason.

When you feel like you are a bad person, Have you considered if it is something that others want to make you feel? Today you will discover why sometimes you think you are acting negatively when you really are not. There are many factors that influence it, but the important thing is how you see it.

“Don’t forget that, good or bad, this too shall pass.”

-Jorge Bucay-

Am I a good person?: The limit between good and bad

Since we were little, they instill in us how good we should be, but What does it mean to be a really good person? Behave well, help others, never say “no”… Some of the things we have been taught threaten ourselves.. Being very good sometimes causes us to expose ourselves to others, being vulnerable and becoming a target at which all the arrows they shoot at us end up.

Read Also: Thought patterns that cause stress and anxiety

As we grow and acquire responsibilities, we sometimes feel guilty. Someone to whom we say “no” gets angry, if we tell the truth sometimes we have more problems than if we lie, we keep up appearances so that no one judges us…

Enough! It is one thing to be a good person and another, very different, is to be stupid and offer ourselves as puppets to others. You should not allow others to use you as they please, you should not allow them to make you feel bad.

If I can’t meet that person, why does he get angry? Why, if I have been sincere, do they treat me and look at me so badly? People ask for sincerity when they prefer to listen to lies. Isn’t this hypocrisy?

“Hypocrisy is the height of all evils”

-Moliere-

When the time comes, you learn to know how to put people in their place. You don’t always have to turn the other cheek and you understand that when you do it like this you are not a bad person. Being selfish, sometimes, is more than positive. You don’t have to be at the mercy of others, because others are not at your mercy. Be free to say “no”, be free to not allow anyone to make you feel like you are a bad person.

No, to emotional blackmail!

Perhaps one of the ways that makes you feel tremendously guilty is emotional blackmail. This not only happens in couples, but in different types of relationships. Blackmail is characterized by making someone feel guilty so that they act as you want. It is a very widespread form and one that you probably identify in most people.

Read Also: Synergistic mentalities, characteristics that define them

Emotional blackmail can make you believe that you are a bad person. If you do not offer yourself completely, if you are not always there, if you say “I can’t stay”, you are already being a bad person. Getting out of this is difficult, because our self-esteem lowers when we believe that in reality we are very little or no good people who continually hurt others, although curiously the one who hurts ourselves the most is yourself.

Have you never thought about how bad things are for you because of someone else? For example, that fear that we sometimes have of saying certain things because we know that the other person might feel bad. But sometimes they escape you and a discomfort is triggered from which you cannot escape. Really, The negative is not in what you have said but in that person’s reaction that bounces off of you and makes you feel tremendously bad. Instead, the other person puts themselves on the plane of the victim.

“There is no burden that weighs more than feeling guilty for something you never did.”

-Anonymous-

Evil and goodness are very relative

When you think you are a bad person, really think about what others have made you think is bad and what is really bad. Evil is what you do for no reason. Imagine that you mistreat someone, that is being a bad person.

But what if you defend your brother from someone? Whether you use hurtful words or physical force if they are being attacked, are you being mean then? Evil and goodness are very relative, it all depends on how you look at it. Therefore, being a good person is not something that goes away if we make mistakes…

Images courtesy of Beth Conklin.