What real friends are like

Have you ever wondered what real friends are like? Or how many friends do you have? Friendship is perhaps the most perfect form of love. Unlike relationships with family, With friends the bond is chosen, not inherited. Unlike the love of a couple, in friendship there are no commitments or exclusivity agreements. Furthermore, every form of love requires that there be friendship, but friendship does not require that other forms of love be involved.

It is said who has a friend, has a treasure. And it’s true. Good friends are a balm for life and an antidote to physical and emotional illnesses. However, not all the people with whom we have continuous dealings are our friends. Not all those who call themselves our friends are truly friends. Deep and sincere friendships are rare and, for that reason, it is good that we learn to value them.

What are the main characteristics of a true friend?

According to a new study supported by the BBVA Foundation, it has been found that Spaniards have a greater number of friends than people who live in other nearby countries. But are the quality of these friendships that good? Are they real friends, people who seem nice, or just mere acquaintances?

The word friendship It encompasses many things. In fact, sometimes it is not appreciated as much as it should be. So much so that, as determined by research carried out by Dr. Félix Requiena, from the University of Málaga, Spaniards and Americans often evaluate their level of happiness in proportion to the friends they have on social networks. Therefore, to raise awareness about the true meaning it has, we suggest you pay attention to the qualities that a true friend must have.

1. He sincerely cares about you

He doesn’t just show up when he needs you or when he doesn’t have something better to do. That’s why He is aware of what is happening to you and does not wait for you to look for him to make himself present.. He is interested in knowing about you and he will be the first to arrive when you go through a serious problem.

The concern he feels for you is selfless. He just loves you and wants you to be well. It doesn’t “die” if something bad happens to you, nor does it have the emotional intensity of other types of relationships, but you are always sure that he is there.

2. He wants to understand you, not judge you

Friendship involves mutual acceptance. A true friend does not want to change you, nor is he in charge of criticizing you or questioning your life.. She knows you have flaws, but she’s not interested in pointing them out to you. And if she does it, it is surely with the intention that you suffer less and not that you become someone else.

A true friend is open to understanding, rapport and dedication, as indicated by research developed by the University of the Republic of Cuba on friendship relationships in adolescence. If you talk to him about your problems, he will try to understand your position and not point out your mistakes. That’s why, With that person you feel comfortable being yourself, showing yourself as you are..

3. Lighten difficult situations

A true friend knows that he is not your mother, nor your confessor, nor your psychologist. Therefore, instead of lecturing you, or giving you a lecture on good living, share difficult moments with you spontaneously and easily.

If he knows you’re overwhelmed, he invites you out for ice cream or a walk in the park. If he knows that you are going through an unpleasant situation, he will reduce the drama and joke with you to make the matter less serious. If he knows that you suffer, he will be by your side in a serene and non-invasive way..

4. He knows how to listen to you

If something distinguishes true friendship, it is that ability to listen, which goes far beyond staying silent while another person speaks, as Francisco Urgarte points out in his book The art of friendship (2014). Real listening is respectful and warm. She is also attentive to the other’s words and helps him listen to himself.

Knowing how to listen means not interfering with what the other person says, if it is not necessary. It is accepting what the other expresses, without gestures or attitudes of disapproval. Listening is accompanying someone in silence, as he shapes his ideas and feelings through words. A true friend listens to you without judging.

5. He is sincere and has a bad memory

Great friends don’t pretend, neither what they think about you, nor what they feel about you. The charm of friendship is precisely that those involved trust each other and know what to expect from each other. There is no place for false courtesy or hypocrisy among true friends.

In other types of relationships, a disagreement or a fight can escalate. But not in friendship. True friendship easily forgets those conflicts and turns the page without a problem.. Of course there are limits, but everyday disagreements make little difference in friendship.

6. Value your defects as virtues

No person is perfect, far from it. In this sense, it is logical to think that many people do not like the way you are because they focus too much on your personal defects. What’s more, they may even be convinced to constantly reveal them to you in public or private so that you can focus on changing them.

However, A good friend will be one who does not focus on them because they will serve as a mirror so that you can see and enhance the best in yourself. In fact, this is one of the great lucks of having true life partners; since they will also allow you to evolve as a person.

And you? Are you a real friend?

True friendship is built between two. Rather than reviewing whether your friends meet all of these requirements, we invite you to do the exercise of evaluating how good a friend you are. For sure, who knows how to be a friend finds real friends.

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