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What are swingers and how do they experience sexuality?

Have you ever exchanged partners? It is another way of understanding relationships and one’s own sexuality. It’s time to break the taboo and delve into this topic. We explain it to you.

Have you heard of the term swingers? This word designates a sexual practice that has been around for a long time in society itself and which, however, remains a taboo subject. We are talking about partner exchange and that consensual agreement between married or engaged people to maintain intimate relationships. It is a new word that describes a very old dynamic.

He swinging It is a type of sexual and erotic philosophy which became popular in the 60s. Since then, communities continue to be created around the world that celebrate parties, events and private gatherings. It is one more way of understanding sexual relationships and it forms a psychosocial phenomenon that is worth delving into. We suggest you know more.

«There is no love without sexual instinct. “Love uses this instinct as a brutal force, like the brig uses the wind.”

~ José Ortega y Gasset (Studies on love, 1927) ~

“Swingers”: definition and characteristics

The swingers are married or engaged people who engage in sexual activity with other consenting couples or individuals. Although this practice became popular in the 1960s with the “free love” movement, interest in this sexual philosophy peaked at the beginning of the new millennium, following a documentary made by the television network ABC News.

From that moment on, figures such as journalist Terry Gould further aroused the population’s curiosity thanks to books such as The Lifestyle: a look at the erotic rights of swingers (2000). In this work, the author stated that About 3% of society carries out this practice. True or not, both sociology and psychology seek to better understand this reality.

1. Agreements based on communication and honesty

There is a fact that stands out in research published in Archives of Sexual Behavior. In our present There is still a social stigma associated with swinging or the exchange of partners. This makes it not easy to access these communities to carry out exhaustive research. However, experts have been able to clarify the following:

The exchange is always carried out in an agreed manner. The couple swingers It is defined by good communication. There are agreed upon rules and limits so that experiences are comfortable. They are communities that are governed by honest agreements. People talk regularly about their feelings and experiences.

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2. The objective is to strengthen the couple’s relationship

If you are a monogamous person, it is very possible that you have a hard time understanding how partner swapping can strengthen the bond between its members. Something that is important to understand is that sexuality is experienced in infinite ways. Likewise, there are many types of relationships in which their members find their happiness and satisfaction in unconventional ways for the majority.

The swingers They carry out this practice in order to give variety to their sexual life and unite ties with their sexual partner.. It is assumed that an open relationship provides flexibility to the emotional bond and greater complicity. Likewise, the opportunity to meet people who share similar interests is always experienced in an enriching way.

On the other hand, you will be interested to know that, in 2020, Bellarmine University in Kentucky (United States) conducted research on the swingers. Something that this community declared is that the sexual practice of swing Their relationship improves and they feel happier.

3. A social group with its own culture

The swingers They have their own flag. It has a red background that represents passion and love. The main element of the flag is a circle with a simplified illustration of a swing (which, in English, is also known as swinger). This represents the union between the community and its philosophy of freedom.

In addition to this symbol, there are other elements that represent the community swingerlike an upside down pineapple.

They see themselves as a population group that has an alternative lifestyle. What’s more, a reasoning maintained by those who integrate this practice is that sexual attraction is part of human behavior. According to this perspective, he swinging avoids infidelities by favoring that open agreement between the couple in which trust is key.

Is “swinging” the same as polyamory?

Although couples exchange has always existed, in recent years new labels have appeared to designate these sexual-affective dynamics. In addition, It is important to clarify that being swinger It is not the same as being polyamorous. We explain the differences below:

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Nature of the relationship: In polyamory, people seek to establish deep emotional and romantic relationships with multiple partners. In it swingingengaged or married couples engage in sexual activities with other couples, but do not wish to establish deep emotional connections beyond friendship.Sexual focusAs noted in Frontiers in Psychology, non-monogamous relationships are common and 1 in 6 people would like to practice polyamory. In this case, sexual relationships with several partners seek to be stable and form a lasting emotional bond. The swingers They only want to get pleasure from casual sex without actually bonding.

Swinger couples are usually in love and form a stable and emotionally satisfying relationship. However, they are people who conceive sexual relations differently from monogamists. They do not believe in exclusivity and see sex as a recreational practice.

What should I know if my partner and I want to practice swinging?

The swingers They make up a social community that even has its own logo. All you have to do is put that identification as a pin to identify yourself with this movement. Events are held, there are hotels, resorts and even cruise ships that promote parties and meetings. swinging.

Nevertheless, It is important to take into account a series of aspects if you want to carry out this practice as a couple. We detail it below.

Agree

In this type of encounter, it is not enough for one person to be just curious and the other to be swept away by the first. If one of you is not sure, that experience can be negative and take its toll on the relationship. As long as it is carried out out of desire, curiosity and tacitly, it can be stimulating and positive.

Use sexual protection methods

Beyond the expressed desire and curiosity, there is an essential element: prophylaxis. It is necessary to have means of protection to avoid sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and unwanted pregnancies.. Likewise, there is another significant fact that you should consider and that is highlighted in BMC Infectious Diseases.

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Many couples of swingers They underestimate the risk of contracting these conditions. Often, they are also not aware of the number of relationships that the spouse has. Nor, if the person with whom you are going to have an intimate encounter, already has some type of infection.

It’s just sex, there will be no emotional bonding

An unwritten rule among this community is that these encounters will not be an experience that later promotes some type of romantic relationship. The only thing sought is enjoyment; Don’t fall in love with someone other than your partner. This is a detail that you should take into account.

Establish rules

As in any sexual encounter, there are always limits.. The most appropriate thing in these cases is to know those couples who will be part of the intimate encounter. That is a good opportunity to make clear the practices that you are not willing to carry out.

Avoid alcohol

In this type of sexual dynamics it is very common for alcohol to be present. It’s not appropriate. Note that Drunken states are not recommended during sex. Not only does it hinder your own performance, but it can also lead to practices that you don’t like or that you don’t remember later.

The “swing” culture knows what it wants

The authentic ones swingersThat is, couples who have integrated this practice into their relationship are clear about several aspects. The first is that they are not going to have these meetings with just anyone. There must be attraction, desire and respect. Not everyone is suitable for them and, sometimes, they can go to an event swing without carrying out any partner exchange.

Therefore, and to conclude, there will be those who do not understand this type of philosophies of life and relationships. However, the culture swing It has been integrated into our society for decades. The most important thing is to always have adequate protection measures against sexually transmitted diseases and make honest communication between couples the best tool.

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