Suffering in silence, that custom that is so ours

Many of us do it, we hide in the convolutions of our private shells to suffer alone, quietly and without anyone noticing. We pretend stoic resistance and pretend that nothing is happening while inside us battles are fought without respite… Until it happens, until one day, just like that, we break.

We are social beings, and yet Most of us choose to suffer alone. We prefer to share laughter, good times, and we cling to day-to-day routines with those around us because that is how we get a certain sense of control. As if nothing was happening, as if nothing was devouring our emotional insides.

Something that both psychologists and psychiatrists know very well is that trauma and silence almost always go hand in hand. It is not easy to say out loud what hurts us, and this is so for two very specific reasons: We fear being judged and above all, demonstrating our vulnerability. Because in this unforgiving world, strong personalities triumph, those who can do everything, those who do not complain and demonstrate effectiveness, optimism and personal security.

All of this undoubtedly leads us to the desolate feeling that today suffering continues to be a stigma. Something that shows us once again why there are so many people with depression who continue without receiving treatment, and why today Suicides among young people reach worrying rates.

We suggest you reflect on it.

Reasons why you should NOT suffer in silence

Recently, In a digital medium of a well-known newspaper, the personal letter of a woman who declared that she could not cope with her life was published.. She had become a mother for the third time and she felt unable to get out of bed. As curious as it may seem, almost 80% of her comments were purely derogatory, sometimes bordering on the limit of cruelty.

Postpartum depression or that difficult stage that is the puerperium continues to be an almost taboo topic today.. If a woman experiences this mood disorder she is immediately sanctioned, because what is expected of her is that she is always 100%, happy and willing. Hence, many mothers live this episode behind closed doors, privately and almost nakedly, fearing criticism from society.

The same thing happens with adolescents, boys and girls who experience bullying firsthand but in silence, without asking for help, in the cage of solitude and in the privacy of their rooms, the only place where they feel safe. It is not appropriate, It is necessary and almost imperative to react before it is too late, before the will falters even more. and our reality is little more than a meaningless scribble.

6 reasons with our own voice why we should stop suffering in silence

The first reason to stop suffering in silence is as simple as it is obvious: suffering is prolonged.. If you do not take the step and do not ask for help, the pain will intensify even more. It will be like a long, suffocating shadow that engulfs everything.

Symptoms will become even more resistantwe will stop being people and become the reflection of pain, with a much deeper, more complex symptomatology.Negative thoughts will intensify. We will be trapped in our own prison. There will come a time when social contact will be uncomfortable for us and we will even reject it. The hugs, emotional caresses and kind words will lose their original meaning for us. We will view them with distrust and interpret them as threats.Postponing the need to ask for help will make subsequent treatment much more complex.We ourselves will perpetuate the stigma. The fact of not taking the step, of refusing to request the attention of a professional or of communicating what is happening to someone we trust, further feeds the idea that trauma and suffering go hand in hand with silence.

Last but not least, We must keep in mind that suffering changes us. He chisels us at her whim to become another person. We will stop being true to ourselves, and that is something that no one deserves.

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Connect to heal

Suffering isolates, but the connection with our peers and with ourselves is therapeutic and healing.. By sharing our vulnerabilities and pain with the right person or well-qualified professional we achieve two advances. The first is to stop self-sabotaging. No one chooses to suffer from postpartum depression. No one deserves to be a victim of bullying, nor a slave to a traumatic past, a lost childhood. Nor does anyone deserve to neglect themselves to the point of stopping loving themselves.

The second benefit that we will achieve is an adequate emotional catharsis. There are many people who come to psychotherapy dressed in the armor of anger, hiding, of course, the fragile being inside. Day by day, reconciliation and adequate connection with your environment will be encouraged to gradually let the chains of suffering fall.

It is a slow and laborious process, there is no doubt, but It is something that we all deserve: to stop suffering in silence and have someone who understands us and helps us. Let’s reflect on it, let us emerge from the conch of our unchosen loneliness to allow ourselves to be ourselves again without fear.