People with high self-esteem: 9 psychological characteristics

Self-esteem is perhaps the most important pillar of our psychological architecture. From the time we are children until we reach old age, perceiving and valuing ourselves positively helps us generate and take advantage of opportunities.

We could define self-esteem as the assessment we make of ourselves. It arises from a self-evaluation and includes what a person thinks and feels about themselves. Therefore, it is associated with whether the individual feels worthy and deserving of love and respect.

People with high self-esteem can be very different from each other. However, they have a series of common characteristics; such as trust, authenticity and the ability to set boundaries with others. We delve into it below.

1. They establish secure attachment relationships

Self-esteem is closely related to attachment style, and this is It begins to develop in childhood, from the bond that the baby establishes with his or her care figures.. If they respond to their needs appropriately and consistently, by offering love and respect, the child grows up feeling valuable and worthy of affection.

The secure attachment style learned in childhood is transferred to other adult relationships, friendships, couples and any other type. Hence These subjects are capable of feeling emotional closeness, without falling into dependency. Thus, they enjoy healthy and long-lasting relationships.

2. They know themselves

Knowing yourself is a necessary condition to love and respect yourself. People satisfied with their personal worth They have a good record of their strengths and weaknesses. They can recognize their skills and take advantage of them. At the same time, they know their weak points and do not hesitate to confront them.

On the other hand, they do not usually perceive loneliness as a negative aspect from which they have to escape, since they feel comfortable being with their own company.

3. They enjoy greater subjective well-being

Subjective well-being is defined by the sensations of happiness, pleasure and life satisfaction and the low presence of unpleasant emotional states.

This well-being, which we all want to achieve, is more accessible to people with high self-esteem. And, since we are the most important beings in our lives, Maintaining a good relationship with ourselves ensures a greater degree of tranquility and joy..

4. They are not afraid to show themselves as they are

To relate appropriately with others, we need to feel trust. It is this security that allows us to be authentic, to show ourselves in a genuine way, without fear of rejection and without needing to put on a mask to pretend.

So, Individuals with high self-esteem do not need to hide or assume a defensive attitude by default. They do not usually feel anxiety about social interaction and manage to relate from balanced and satisfactory positions. The love and respect they feel for their existence, they transfer to others, and they hope to receive the same feelings in return. Therefore, they are unlikely to become involved in or remain in toxic and harmful relationships.

5. They are more optimistic

The person who knows themselves to be valuable, worthy and deserving sees their future as more open and bright. Self-confidence allows him to expect good results, since he knows that he has the capabilities to achieve what he sets out to do. Besides, You are more likely to focus on what works in your life, and how to improve what doesn’t work.instead of stagnating in victimhood.

6. They emerge stronger from adversity

Faced with adverse life situations, people with high self-esteem are more capable of going through them and learning from them., recover and come out stronger. And by having themselves, by being willing to take care of themselves and accompany each other in a loving way, they manage to carry out the processes in a more effective and less painful way.

7. They are assertive

Assertiveness implies adopting a balanced position towards others, in which we neither try to impose ourselves nor allow ourselves to be subjugated. And, for this, it is essential to have a strengthened self-esteem.

Those who possess it are able to express their desires, emotions, opinions and needs firmly, but with respect. They know how to set limits and do not resort to submission or aggressiveness to maintain their bonds.

8. They learn from their mistakes and are capable of taking on challenges

We tend to think that despotic and self-centered people who never admit their mistakes have high self-esteem; But this is not so. Those who genuinely appreciate and value themselves do so with their lights and shadows, They do not need to pretend to be perfect and are able to recognize their mistakes and face criticism.

People who understand that mistakes are part of the process are not afraid of them; On the contrary, they learn from their falls and rise with renewed determination. The good self-concept they have allows them to take on challengesknowing that they will be able to reach their goal and that, if this does not happen, they will have learned valuable lessons along the way.

9. They are autonomous, responsible and confident

Finally, we can infer a person’s level of self-esteem by observing how they take charge of their own life. And, in general, these individuals are autonomous, determined and independent. They take care of themselves and take responsibility for their situation and actions..

On the other hand, when self-esteem is lacking, the person perceives themselves as weak and incapable and therefore tends to look to others for approval or support that they do not obtain from within.

A concept in motion

The perception we have about ourselves is not static, much less irreversible. In fact, it can present certain fluctuations from one day to the next and even when interacting in various spaces. There are many factors that come into play. For example, a person may feel comfortable with his appearance, but not with his job performance, or vice versa.

In this way, it is important to know that people do not have good or bad self-esteem in a decisive and extremist way, but rather tend towards one of those points. If we understand that self-esteem is a concept in motion, we can then understand that it can be worked on.

We can all improve our self-esteem

Not all of us have had the right conditions to form a positive image of ourselves. Unfortunately, There are many people who have not received help to identify all the good that is in them. What’s more, there are many who have had people around them who have made an effort to make them see the opposite.

If this is your case, you need to know that you can work on your self-esteem. For it, It will be necessary for you to analyze what concept you have of yourself, how it has come to be formed and what you need to change..

There are various guidelines and tools that can help you improve the vision you have of yourself. However, having professional help is the best way to achieve your goal. Therefore, if you feel that you need it, do not hesitate to start this personal work.

You might be interested…