How to Know If My Ex Misses Me: 16 Signs He Wants Back

Let’s face it, most long-term relationships go through one or two breakups. So there are real chances that after a breakup, two people will decide to try again.

But there is also a fundamental problem: Neither of them wants to openly admit that they want to return. So how do I know if my ex misses me?

Since we are generally quite proud, perhaps we would prefer that the other person be the one to initiate contact and attempts at reconciliation again. But if your ex-partner is sending you confusing or ambivalent signals, things can simply get even more complicated.

Normally, there are several scenarios that can appear after a breakup. The first is for two people to avoid all contact after they break up.

Although it is not very frequent, because nowadays you have to do a huge purge on social networks and communication channels to truly omit all contact.

It could be that only one party attempts to maintain contact with the other. This panorama does not leave room for many doubts and the possibilities of reconciliation are low. Although the chances are good that the person who keeps trying will look a little pathetic.

But the third scenario can be the most complicated: That they remain friends. Many people achieve it. After dating, they establish a healthy friendship.

But in many cases, at least for one of them, it is just a pretext to recover the relationship at some point.

Read 4 reasons why your ex ignores you

Does your ex-partner want to get back with you? How to know if your ex misses you?

Breaking up with our partner is one of the most painful things we can go through. Even if we are completely convinced that it was for the best, it is very difficult not to miss all the special moments we shared with that special someone.

Therefore, almost always one of the members of the relationship tries to return at some point. It can happen to you. It can happen to your ex, or, if you’re lucky, you both want it.

If you still stay in contact and you think you can get back what you had, but you don’t want to risk rejection, you can pay attention to the 16 signs that an ex-partner will send you who wants you back in their life on a romantic level.

16 signs that your ex-partner wants you back:

1.- He does not go out on dates with other people

If your ex doesn’t seem to be actively looking for another partner, or doesn’t want you to know that he’s dating someone else, there’s a chance that deep down he’s waiting to get back with you. Of course, it could also be that he doesn’t want to hurt you, or that he just doesn’t feel ready.

But, if he really didn’t care about getting back into the relationship, he probably wouldn’t have any qualms about you finding out that he’s dating someone else, or that he’s in the process of meeting other people.

2.- Send signs that he misses you

If your ex has told all of their mutual friends that they feel sad since they’re no longer together, that’s because they know that sooner or later someone will tell you.

Likewise, if he updates his status on social networks with “mysterious” messages but that are clearly dedicated to you, you can have hope.

These signals can be very diverse, but they all have something in common: they are designed to get your attention and show you, in a more or less subtle way, that the person is still thinking about you.

3.- He calls you frequently

Even if you stayed friends, the normal thing is that if you broke up with someone the communication is not so intense, if they really don’t want to come back. Otherwise, they will surely find any excuse to call each other and will have a hard time hanging up.

It is an uncomfortable feeling because it is like an open door that neither of us dares to cross.

4.- Continue to be affectionate and kind

If your ex still loves you, he or she will continue to behave in a loving and warm manner toward you. He might even be even more loving than before.

Friendship is a permissive concept with many possibilities. There are genuine friendship relationships that are characterized by a strong emotional component. But if an ex is having these attitudes it’s probably because he wants to get back with you.

5.- Physical contact and closeness

If your ex greets you with more enthusiasm than other people. Or prolong a goodbye hug two seconds longer than necessary, or look for any excuse to sit down and be close to you, it’s because he misses you.

If I really were in the position of not wanting to return, I would use the chair furthest from you when you are both in the same space.

6.- Talk about your feelings

Ex-partners who have a hard time detaching from you are very likely to talk frequently about the past relationship.

If your ex constantly calls you to talk about their old relationship, or wonders what could have gone wrong in such a perfect relationship, or tells you how happy they were when you were together, they clearly want to get back together.

Although he lacks that little impulse to say it openly and is waiting for you to take the initiative.

7.- Keeps memories alive

It is perfectly normal for your partner to remember your anniversary, your birthday, your sister’s birthday, and your favorite place to go to dinner.

What is not so normal is for an ex to mark the 15th of the month every day to remind you that they would have been together for another month. She’s clearly dying to get back.

8.- Be aware of your life

If your ex calls you to congratulate you on a promotion or a trip that you never shared with him, it is because he is very aware of your life.

Whether by asking mutual friends or on social networks. Sure, he might consider calling you to congratulate you on your accomplishments or help you with your struggles a nice gesture. But, if you didn’t still care, why would you do it?

9.- It tells you that it has changed

Every relationship ends for a reason. Many times, a person who wants to return to another person uses it as a strategy to achieve their goals.

Let’s say for example that they broke up because of his infidelity. If he now insists on convincing you that he has found the value of loyalty and that he is now the most faithful person in the world, it is surely because he wants to recover what he lost due to his mistakes.

10- He tells you that he misses you

It is perfectly normal that after a breakup we miss our ex-partner. It may be that we miss the person as such, or the happy moments.

And while that doesn’t necessarily mean you want to come back, when you express it clearly to the other person, there really isn’t much to interpret.

When your ex always tells you that he misses you, what he really means is “I miss you, and I want to know if you also miss me enough to try the possibilities of getting back.”

Answer that unspoken question clearly and sincerely. This will speed up a happy reconciliation or prevent your ex from continuing to waste time.

11.- He sends you messages with his mutual friends

It is not at all unusual that, when we end a relationship and want to get it back, we turn to a mutual friend for help.

Regardless of whether we put the friend in question in an uncomfortable situation, we will try to get him to go and tell our ex-partner how much we miss him and how we would like to return.

12.- Shows absolute availability

Do you need help with an exam? With a move? To change a tire at three in the morning hundreds of kilometers from your house?

If your ex is the first person you think of calling, and they also happen to always be available to you, then you’ve either established the most unlikely friendship on earth, or you both want to get back together.

13- He has attacks of jealousy

One of the clearest signals we can send to someone when we want to return is attacks of jealousy when someone else is courting or courting our ex-partner.

If your ex never stops criticizing your new relationships, established or hypothetical, and thinks that none of them are worth it for you, it’s not that he’s waiting for you to date Brad Pitt. He rather wants to get back with you, and he doesn’t like competition.

14.- By chance you find them everywhere

Suddenly you start seeing your ex with a fairly suspicious frequency. In the cafe you always frequent. At a mutual friend’s house. Or at a concert you bragged on Facebook that you would go to…

They say that coincidences do not exist, and I disagree. But if every time you meet your ex you agree that somehow he or she was able to find out that you would be in that place at that precise moment, it is not a coincidence.

15.- Use alcohol as an “excuse”

Typical strategy. And quite pathetic, needless to say. We have this idea that when we are very drunk we do things that we really didn’t want to do. But it is quite the opposite.

When we get drunk, we lose our inhibitions and do and say everything we want, but we don’t dare.

If your ex swears that he misses you and needs you at three in the morning, in the middle of an alcohol congestion, and the next day he texts you to ignore him because he was drunk, stick with the first version.

It would still be good to consider how wise it is to return to someone who needs alcohol as an excuse.

16.- They try hard to look unhappy

Normally, when two people who were together remain friends, if the friendship is true, they will not mind if the other starts dating someone else. Or move to live far away.

But an ex who intends to get back and doesn’t know how to tell you will react with great sadness to any event that could take him away from his goal of getting you back.

If you also want to return, it is important that you learn to detect these signs to use them to your advantage. Not in an advantageous way, but to be able to start a relationship again but at a healthier point.

If your ex-partner insists on telling you that he or she has changed or showing more affection towards you, continue down that path, making sure that those things continue when you get back together.

Maybe you don’t want to get back with your ex, don’t give him false hope. If you detect one or more of the signs, confront it and cut it short. It can be very flattering to feel that someone misses us and needs us.

But taking advantage of that is unethical and wastes the other person’s valuable time, to whom we at least owe some kind of respect. You simply wouldn’t want something like that done to you.

Do you know any other signs that your ex misses you? It would be incredible if you left us your comments.

If you want to get your ex back you can’t stop reading our guides!:

Read how to get your ex back in 4 steps

Read how to get back with your ex even if he has a girlfriend