How BBB20’s Babu reignited the toxic masculinity debate

Even those who criticized or refused to attend the BBB had to give their arm to twist during the 20th edition of the program. The reality became the stage for important discussions about movements and social flags. The first half of the program was especially marked by the fight against chauvinism, which eliminated virtually every man in the house. The only remaining male representative is Babu Santanaactor, who now shares a house with four women and is one of the favorites for the award.

Babu is black🇧🇷 peripheral and fatthat is, it brings together several identities that were the target of preconception during the three months of BBB. On several occasions, she heard speeches full of structural racism, even from the “sensible fairies” (the group of women who fought against machismo on the program), and several times she suffered in tests because of her body – at one point, she even managed to put a bracelet on the wrist, because it is too small. What possibly made Babu so popular with the public was his patience in explaining to others about his prejudices and privileges and, at the same time, acknowledging hers as a man. One of the most striking scenes of the season was the actor’s conversation with the other men in the group in the midst of one of the fights with the women. 🇧🇷Even if you are upset inside, apologize and you will reflect. Because it is very difficult to leave the position of privilege”, he guided.

Even though he was open to dialogue and listening, he was seen as an aggressive and frightening man by some of the women in the house, who made him the very stereotype of the black man, even though this had absolutely nothing to do with Babu’s personality. . With the audience’s adoration, in the final stretch the actor managed to approach those who were “afraid” of him and rekindled another very important debate on national television: that of toxic masculinity, the phenomenon that programs man to be exactly what he, perhaps, originally is not. The term refers to stereotyped characteristics normally attributed to men, most of them completely ignored and repudiated by Babu.

Babu cries and exposes his feelings, without fear of having his sexual orientation questioned. Last Saturday (18), he accepted the idea of sisters to make him up and dress him as a woman, without any problems – and more, he had fun and felt completely comfortable with it. “It was the greatest pleasure to make myself a canvas so the girls could paint, create; turn a blank page for them to color in. I never had a problem with that, I’ve done it a few times even for bones of the trade and it was a lot of fun. It’s great to get closer to everyone”, said Babu about what happened.

What is Toxic Masculinity?

“That’s a woman’s thing”, “swallow the tears”, “become a man”. These are some of the many lines that reinforce the stereotype that men should not externalize their feelings. This is the famous toxic masculinity🇧🇷

Behavioral patterns reproduced and associated with them start from childhood. That cry that arises when the child falls or is scolded is soon blocked by the phrase “men don’t cry”, and then they are forced to “swallow” the crying and forcefully repress their emotions. These are clearly pre-established rules, but subtly inserted into the daily life of the male figure.

The demand to be “macho” drives a series of problems and negligence, including with health. The ideal of masculinity makes men not seek doctors or admit that they need one.

Conduct is also put in check: they internalize their feelings and show aggressive behavior to society, especially against women, which often causes serious cases of domestic violence and femicide🇧🇷

Cases of depression among men are commonplace and little discussed. Showing your vulnerability is not an option when it comes to your man and his feelings. Data from the Ministry of Health show that men kill themselves almost four times more than women. The death rate from suicide is 2.4 for women, while for men it is 9.2. This happens because men believe and associate depression with weakness, and what they least want is to show that they are not strong, in addition to the lack of information.

The ideal of what it is to be masculine and the aggressiveness that develops from it also makes men more easily involved in fights, and there is pressure to hide vulnerability. And the harm does not stop there. Relationships are also directly affected, where there is a direct need that the man needs to be good in bed, but does not know the female body. The discussion about this subject and the recognition of such attitudes arise with awareness.

How to identify attitudes

Hearing what women have to say about harmful attitudes is one of the steps to self-analyze and understand what toxic masculinity is. Caio Cesar, 24, is a student and professor of Geography and believes that discomfort is the main factor to generate changes in this aspect. “We’re talking about letting go of behaviors that were previously seen as normal or okay. But the benefits are many from the moment you understand that you can exercise your masculinity in a lighter and healthier way, not only for others, but for yourself, ”he said. The young man promotes conversations on the subject with a short course called “Understanding Masculinities”, and the topics discussed are taken by the participants themselves based on their questions, experiences and different opinions.

Questioning and talking about masculinity involves several issues, not just gender. Through it, it is possible to understand about race and sexuality, for example. “Addressing these questions is crucial to understanding how men are constructed and what are the intersectionalities in relation to the theme. Talking about racism, homophobia and transphobia is fundamental to having an in-depth and honest debate”, observes Caio.

The impact of the discussions is to bring men a new sense of relationships, in addition to making them understand their place as men in a structurally sexist society, in addition to rethinking attitudes that are harmful not only to them, but to people who are in their lives and day to day.

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