Have I wasted my life?

Maybe years have passed without you realizing it. Work obligations, daily routine or a large number of worries have kept you away from reflecting on how you are or how you feel. But, Perhaps, one day, tired of living in that kind of automatism, you have begun to investigate yourself. and questions like “Have I gotten what I wanted or have I wasted my life?”, “Am I in the place I want to be?” appear in your mind constantly.

If you have ever found yourself asking yourself these questions or if you are at that vital point at this very moment, don’t worry. It’s more normal than you imagine. Almost all of us at some point in our lives go through these types of trances.

Now, although at first questioning may be scary because we don’t know how far we are going to go, it also It may be time for an internal state of positive introspection that results in personal enrichment. Therefore, from this period of crisis a new impulse can emerge capable of redirecting your life towards a more positive and conscious state. Let’s dig deeper.

The big question: Have I wasted my life?

When a person asks themselves this question, the sensation they may experience is sometimes described as a kind of abyss opening up inside them. In fact, it is not uncommon for this to lead you to observe your life, in retrospect, with the aim of taking stock between the achievements achieved and the negative events or failures.

The result can lead to a multitude of feelings that want to come out. Perhaps because for a time they have remained dormant or even repressed. The important thing is to identify them, reflect on their origin and express them. In some way, this gives clues about how one is feeling and helps release burdens that prevented one from continuing.

As we see, asking this question has the consequence of carrying out an extensive mental and emotional journey through each of the vital areas to which importance is given, valuing them one after another. Thus, among these important areas, the following stand out:

The job

“Do I like my job?”, “What prospects does it offer me?”, “Will I be here forever?”, “Have I wasted my life on it?”

These are questions that do not usually have an easy answer. Working is essential to live and, therefore, It is a reality that is difficult to escape.. Therefore, although not all work circumstances can be controlled, the attitude with which work is approached depends on each person.

However, many psychologists advise that since, in general, It is not recommended that happiness depend on a jobit may be a good idea to opt for one that is lighter emotionally, if the person is not feeling well or somehow perceives greater discomfort or negative consequences.

It is important to be aware that you do not have to force anyone to be where they do not want to be. For that reason, We can all rethink our work situation and start searching for new opportunities, if we consider it that way.

When the job you do brings more disappointment than satisfaction, it may be time to look for possibilities for progress and thus avoid stagnation in discomfort. However, it is true that there are times when this is not possible.

Life is made up of moments and, therefore, one way to take advantage of it is by learning to make the most of each of the moments that make it up. Thus, if, for example, you cannot always be at home because of your work, so that this fact does not detract from your ability to enjoy life, you can choose to ensure that the moments in which you are at home are unforgettable.

The family

“Have I wasted my family life?” This may be another of the big questions that cross our minds. The positive side of facing it is that by reframing the question, a different answer can be obtained.

That is to say: by transforming that question into a statement devoid of negative emotionality, which drives towards action, you can acquire a more flattering vision of family life than the one that has been leading until now: “I may have wasted my family life. So, now is the time to do something to stop it from being like this.”

In most cases, the family is not chosen; Despite this, it is beneficial, on an emotional level, experience gratitude for the family you haveeven for the mere fact of having it -since not everyone enjoys that luck-.

The past, if one wants to see it that way, may be nothing more than a daydream in memory. And because it is nothing more than that, it does not have to hinder the fact of act in the present moment and recover ties with the family. Therefore, if we need to forgive, we have permission to do so and if we need to be forgiven, we have the right to be forgiven.

In summary, It can be positive to think that the family represents our roots, our origin; that group of people with whom we have so much in common. In this way, it is very likely that we will feel the desire not to neglect it.

Children

There are people who do not attach importance to having children, since they have other priorities. However, For others, it seems to be almost a transcendental mission in life.

Either way, It is advisable to reflect from a state of calm and taking a certain distance from what happens to us. Clarity of thought often leads to successful action.

In the event that there is great concern about the education that the children are receiving or about their future, the question is, is there something that forces us to maintain that constant state of concern? Exists the possibility of trying new strategies to alleviate that concern and direct things differently.

Friends

Years go by and, the most normal thing is that there are friends who stop being part of our lives, while others can come in. Something that happens more pronounced if you change city or country.

As a result, we may feel like we have fewer and fewer friends left. When this happens, generally, one of the following two paths is chosen: deciding to close oneself and maintain the social sphere that one has, despite thinking that it is deteriorated or, opening up to new friendships, without forgetting the old ones. The choice of one path or another depends on each person.

Achievements

The question that commonly precedes “have I wasted my life?” It is, on many occasions, “what have I achieved in life?” With the objective of assess the degree of satisfaction in relation to one’s own achievements vital, it is typical to establish certain measurement criteria that normally arise from comparison.

And from that type of comparison, questions can emerge like: “Have I not achieved everything I wanted in life?” Perhaps the most pernicious thing about that question is the feeling that the point of maximum achievement has been reached. The thing is, there is almost always time ahead, so There are many possibilities to embark on new successes.

It is an opinion shared by many that It is never too late to reinvent yourself and achieve what you set out to do.. This assertion may not be entirely misguided. However, both the objectives we can set and the achievements we can achieve will depend, almost certainly, on ourselves.

Reinvent yourself to live

What are the resources available? What limitations exist on a day-to-day basis? These questions lead to knowledge of the factors that may be preventing you from getting where you want, as well as the awareness of the skills available to meet these objectives.

And this knowledge is, in general, important to ‘release ballast’, to get away from that which, rather than helping us achieve our goals, makes it difficult for us to approach them. So, learn from those who possess admirable qualities It is a good idea to support yourself in this process of knowledge and improvement.

The past years, whether many or few, are each and every one of them experiences and memories that accumulate and build our own tower of wisdom. There where you can find the right material to build a better version of yourself.

If we are so plagued by the question of whether or not we have wasted the years of our lives, maybe, and just maybe, it all boils down to a matter of time. It is possible that by reviewing our objectives and detecting what has been left half finished, we can restart the path towards the goals that one day we set for ourselves.

That which detracts from the value and quality of our days does not deserve our closeness. On the other hand, what it gives us may more than deserve our proximity. Therefore, we must act and continue learning and in situations of deep vital questioning in which our decisions come into play, you can choose to assume three different attitudes:

Make the decision.Don’t take it.Deciding not to decide – although deep down, it is a decision, therefore it is a mental trap.

Which of the three decisions is for the bravest and which is the most cowardly, only we can know. As the judo master Jigoro Kano said: “The important thing is not to be better than others, but to be better than yesterday.”

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