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7 types of fake friends that we should recognize

Fake friends are like the dark side of the Moon. At first they dazzle us with their charms and kind attention, but little by little we begin to sense that other side where the recesses of an interested character live. That barren and desolate affectivity that, almost without realizing it, saps our spirits. They are profiles that we must undoubtedly know how to identify as soon as possible, especially for our emotional health.

It is often said that Friendship is the best ingredient in life. So is love, there is no doubt, but what makes a good friend transcends, sometimes, the bonds of emotional and family relationships. Thus, this fabric built on the basis of complicity, common experiences and intense trust is what gives us a source of eternal energy and, above all, quality of life.

“Those who believe themselves to be good and helpful are the same ones who, out of envy, wish you all evil.”

-Lucca Capiotto-

Nevertheless, It is inevitable to come across, from time to time, one of those specimens so common in our social contexts, where interest and selfishness are camouflaged under the covering of the most luminous friendship. And we fall, of course we fall. Because in our natural innocence we do not doubt for a moment that the cardinal purpose of all good friendship is to provide happiness, support and well-being.

Until it finally happens, disappointments, small lies, constant contempt and the most sibylline manipulations appear. Whether we like it or not, we are facing one more of those false friends that we did not see arrive, but whom we must let go as soon as possible for health and our own dignity…

1. Types of fake friends: the social mountaineer

One of the first false friends that we tend to encounter early in our lives is the “social mountaineer.” We see them in primary and secondary school classes, at the university and of course, in our work environments.

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They are those who build bonds of friendship only for one purpose: to climb positions in the social context. Thus, it is common that during their school days they seek the proximity of the most popular students or those who obtain the best grades. Later, and in a work context, they will not hesitate to humiliate and manipulate left and right to climb positions.

2. The friend who is there in good times and becomes invisible in bad times

This typology of false friendship will undoubtedly be familiar to most of us. We are talking about those people who are always around on days of calm and well-being, who sign up for any plan, any party, getaway or last-minute proposal. However, When a problem or situation arises where we would most appreciate your support and interest, they disappear like the wind closing a window…

3. The error finder, the one who judges you

If there is something that characterizes the healthiest friendship, it is one that provides us with well-being at all times. This makes us feel good about their closeness, we have the security that we will not be judged or criticized and that by spending a few hours with that person, we will leave better than we arrived.

However, this does not happen with false friends; With them it is common for us to return home much worse than before.. In fact, a typology that tends to abound is one that has a hobby of finding fault with ourselves, calling our attention to every mistake we make (or not) and judging ourselves day in and day out. This type of dynamic generates considerable emotional exhaustion.

4. The one who envies you quietly or blatantly

“You do everything well”, “those things don’t happen to you like they do to me”, “you are always very lucky”… These and other types of phrases are what those people usually repeat to us. false friends who, deep down, envy us.

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However, what they have is low self-esteem, which leads them to this type of very unhealthy interactions for both parties.

5. The one who wants things to go well for you but not better than for him

This trait of false friendship is as curious as it is common at the same time. It manifests itself in the following way: we have people who encourage us to improve ourselves, to achieve things, however, when this happens, far from feeling happy for us, they distance themselves. or show discomfort.

After these types of situations, what there is, once again, is a marked low self-esteem. They will always feel more comfortable with us as long as we are at their level and in the same conditions.. However, any hint of success or improvement exposes them, plunges them into contradiction and discomfort.

6. The rival disguised as a “best friend”

If you buy a cell phone, don’t hesitate, one of your friends will look to buy a much better one. If you join the gym, be careful, he or she will also do it to beat your marks. His goal: to be better than you in anything you do, in any purpose you set or in any achievement you achieve.

These fake friends They act as our nemesis, that persecuting and vengeful shadow that will try to be better than us in any area of ​​our life..

7. The one who manipulates you

The manipulative friend is that discreet but implacable specimen that, almost without us realizing it, anchors the strings of a puppet to us. to manage us as he pleases for a while. He will sometimes use victimhood, other times emotional blackmail and other times deception and infinite Machiavellian strategies to have us in the palm of his hand and thus achieve what he wants at all times.

Thus, the time that we allow this series of actions to the manipulator will depend on the affection we have for him, on whether he is that old friend, that childhood friend with whom we have experienced so many things… How do we put an end to that emotional bond that has accompanied you for so many years? It may be difficult, but few things are as destructive as being influenced by someone who, in reality, does not love us or loves us badly.

To conclude, as we can already guess, there are many more types of false friends: those who criticize, those who betray, those who spread gossip… We could describe multiple typologies, however, The most important thing about all of this is that in addition to identifying them, we know how to manage them.

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Sometimes, There is no need to necessarily resort to breaking that bond. Sometimes it is enough to make things clear, set limits and even, why not, encourage personal growth. and that friend’s self-esteem so that they are able to create healthier relationships.

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