Suddenly, the charm was lost, the magic was gone and all those vows of eternal love, admiration and even respect stopped making sense. For many people, these are the most obvious symptoms that precede the end of a relationship, but for others it is just the beginning of a new phase, difficult to accept and which, over time, will turn out to be bitter, gray and unhappy. .
Staying in a broken relationship or marriage can have disastrous consequences, yet many people insist on dragging themselves into a doomed relationship. Know the main reasons and discover that the end can be the beginning of a new beginning.
1 – The children
Although everyone knows the maxim that children do not sustain relationships, many couples give up their own happiness in the name of their children’s well-being and avoid separating so as not to cause trauma and suffering. In fact, children must be preserved from all the crises that are part of any relationship, but it is necessary to see to what extent they are not being used as a pretext for not making an imminent decision.
Depending on the age and personality of the child, a separation can be traumatic, but the fundamental thing is that children understand that the relationship between them and their parents are eternal bonds.
Children feel everything that happens around them and growing up in an environment where unhappiness and fights reign can reflect negatively on their development, so always keep in mind that children will grow up one day and in the same way that parents want to see their children. happy, children want their parents’ happiness above all else.
2 – Financial dependence
When they get married, many women give up their professional lives to dedicate themselves more diligently to their home, their husbands and especially their children. Reconciling so many responsibilities is not easy, which leads women to exclusively take care of the administration of the house and the man starts to act as the provider, as in the past.
The conflict starts to happen when the woman is not satisfied with her relationship and because she has been out of the job market for a long time, she is unable to support herself or maintain the same standard of living for herself and her children. That’s when she finds herself totally dependent on her husband and forced to resign.
In this case, it is important to assess whether this comfort zone is so comfortable as to give up a better, independent and happy future.
3 – Self-indulgence
Self-indulgence is one of the main reasons for staying in a bad relationship. The person gets used to the situation they are in, thinks that it is not worth taking any action and gives up doing anything to improve the relationship, because they believe that nothing works.
The reality is that getting used to outside a bad relationship is, for the most part, much easier and more pleasurable than getting used to it inside. It may even take some time, but experiencing a separation after an unsuccessful relationship can have a positive and fundamental balance for the person to evolve as a human being.
4 – Hope for change
One day you went to sleep with a prince and the next day he was gone. There are women who spend years waiting for this prince to return, if he ever existed somewhere other than their own imagination.
The realization that that wonderful man was only seen through the eyes of a passion that no longer exists can be hard, but admitting that you made a wrong choice can be easier and more satisfying than staying in a relationship where neither party has anything to do with it. good to offer the other. Everyone knows that ending a relationship isn’t easy, but the sooner you recognize what’s happening and take control, the less suffering will be.
5 – Guilt
Many women take responsibility for the wear and tear of dating or marriage and ask themselves countless times to find out where they went wrong, at what moment they let the flame go out, why that man so in love no longer looks at her like before. As they hardly find a plausible answer to such questions, they feel guilty and persist in the relationship.
There is no way to find blame for the natural end of a relationship. In the same way that it is built by two, it can be deconstructed by both parts, without either of them having wanted or thought about it.
Changes are part of the natural cycle of life, conforming to suffering is not. Instead of suffering with guilt, how about facing reality and facing the problem so that later on you don’t feel guilty for having wasted a lot of time in your life being unhappy?
6 – Fear of being alone
Nobody enters a relationship expecting that one day it will end, but everyone works, leaves, creates relationship circles in which the partner is not a part, which means that no one is free to find a new passion.
Many women see separation as a step towards a lonely future, but accepting to continue in a relationship without love and sometimes even with betrayal can be scarier than starting over from scratch.
And therein lies the challenge: accepting that each person has their own life and the responsibility to be happy. In certain situations, being alone for a while can be the best company, capable of making you understand that everything that was lived and shared was beautiful, but it doesn’t exist anymore and that you need to have your own dreams, a path of your own. to go on with your own legs and, above all, to find your life goal, whatever it may be, you have to be happy.
7 – Low self-esteem
“Who is going to be interested in a separated woman?”, “I don’t know how to relate to another man anymore”, “I can’t do it alone”, “Falling in love at this point in the championship is ridiculous”. These are just some of the fears that make women insist on getting stuck in an unhappy relationship. Low self-esteem has never been good company, so it’s essential to remember that one day the woman who doesn’t see herself today was once independent, passionate and happy with life.
To remember this, anything goes: find those old friends you lost touch with because he didn’t like it, go back to doing the things you did before marriage, develop self-esteem, don’t sit still, make new friends, join the gym, schedule a trip. If this is the case, look for a psychotherapist to work on the issue of insecurity.
Socialize and realize that the best company for you and anyone is someone you love and value.
Living doing everything to see the other happy is great, but alone or in company, always put your happiness at the top of the list. Deep down, deep down, being well resolved with you is what enables you to enter and remain well in any kind of relationship.
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