6 tips to overcome an existential crisis

There are times when one doubts everything, even oneself. The world seems like a distorted scene lacking meaning, while the people around us are seen as empty entities that do not excite. Purposes fail and sadness makes its way with its withered smell. How to overcome an existential crisis? How to address that feeling of numbness and constant unreality?

Anyone has had doubts at some point about the meaning of life and their place in the world.. From a psychological point of view, although this clinical category does not exist as such, the experience is usually defined as “existential depression.” It is a moment of personal inflection in which it is necessary to reflect, make decisions and make changes.

If you feel identified with this experience, the keys revealed during the reading will be helpful.

What usually are the origins of existential crises?

Do you think everything you did so far is meaningless? Do you often wonder what purpose there is in evil, inequalities, or even death? Are you aware that things are going well for you, but despite this, you feel lost and discouraged? Existential crises usually invoke infinite questions that do not always have answers.

Psychology has been addressing this issue for decades, given the suffering it causes. Although it is true that, previously, the understanding of existential anguish fell within the realm of philosophy, currently there is extensive scientific literature on the matter. See, below, the triggers for this psychological discomfort.

Identity crisis.Losing a loved one. Suffering from an illness. The presence of a mood disorder. Loneliness is also a root of this devastating experience.Undergo drastic changes: losing a job, an emotional breakup. Having a routine life and realizing that dreams and desires do not come true. Experiencing a sustained period of crisis; as happened during the COVID-19 pandemic.People with high intellectual abilities are more likely to suffer existential crisesas revealed by a study from the University of Innsbruck, in Austria.The existential crisis arises especially during transitions, such as reaching maturity, having a child, growing old, suffering from empty nest syndrome, etc. These are moments in which what is taken for granted is torn down and uncertainty, fear, and not knowing what will happen open up.

Existential crises are moments to make decisions.

Keys to overcoming an existential crisis

There is no need to fear existential crises, after all, they are nothing more than a call from that inner being beneath the conscience to make new decisions. It is an opportunity for growth. Carl Jung used to say that for part of our life we ​​are dedicated to obeying the ego, but it is in the second half that we must become who we truly will be.

Although it is true that these crises are a complex and even painful psychological phenomenon, it is convenient to see them as a journey and a process of personal reconstruction and redefinition. That’s the key. And to take that brave step, the strategies that we define below will be helpful.

1. Existential therapy

Existential therapy is an approach that guides the person to make meaningful decisions and towards those changes that, ultimately, are in tune with your personal values ​​and purposes. One of the most prominent figures in this model is Dr. Irvin D. Yalom.

In his clinical practice he guides patients in four basic areas: reformulating a new meaning in life, overcoming isolation, recovering freedom and addressing the fear of death. Research such as that carried out at the University of Roehampton suggests that these types of therapies are useful in reducing the stress associated with transitions. The aspects worked on are the following:

Benefit social connection to avoid loneliness. Confront pessimistic and limiting thoughts. Allow the person to draw new vital meanings.Help overcome uncertainty and feelings of anguish.Promote the construction of a more creative, free and purposeful life.Existential therapy favors a more flexible and positive mental approach.

2. Define who you are and what you want from life

To overcome an existential crisis it is necessary to look in the mirror and become aware of who we are and what we want. Many of these moments of painful inflection are due to the fact that we do not finish defining and strengthening our identity. This is because we spend part of our lives being as others expect, fitting into other people’s molds and letting ourselves be carried away by simple inertia.

It is time to apply certain changes and, to do so, it is positive to reflect on the ideas now listed:

Ask yourself what you would like to be like in five years.Write on paper what your strengths are.List your passions, your dreams and desires in the short and long term. Reflect on whether the person you are now is who you really want to be. In this exercise, discover everything that you are good at and that makes you proud. Finally, Think about what changes you should make to get closer to your “authentic self.”

3. Reconnect with what gives you meaning

As psychiatrist Viktor Frankl pointed out, “the meaning of life lies in having a reason. That is when we will find a ‘how’. If we feel free and motivated, we can always generate all the necessary changes to create a much nobler reality.

In essence, the cornerstone to overcoming an existential crisis is become aware of what gives us meaning here and now.

Ask yourself What makes you feel good and fulfilled as a person? at this very moment. Keep in mind that everyone changes and what motivated you a few years or a few months ago may not do so in the present. Therefore, it is advisable to reflect on those areas or dimensions that currently excite you.

4. Take distance for a while to discover new perspectives

If you need to overcome an existential crisis, distance yourself for a few days from the everyday and ordinary. Break with the routine. Take some time alone to reconnect with yourself and glimpse, from a distance, where you are. Often, It is in those moments devoid of routines and pressures when everything becomes more logical.

The mind is frequently filled with a high load of external “noise.” Social networks, the environment, society and its distorted messages, current news. All of this can mean that, at a given moment, things stop having meaning for us. A few days of digital detox and solitude are healing and also revealing.

Existential crises urge us to take new vital paths.

5. Accept your emotions, to change behaviors

In a work published by the American Psychological Association They point out that crises have to do with the sense of mortality, legacy and achievements. Somehow, there always comes a time when we take stock of what we have achieved and what was left unconquered along the way.

Every crisis is accompanied by feelings of loss, disappointment and sadness that it is advisable to accept.Leaving space for negatively valenced emotions doesn’t mean they will drag you down. It involves giving them presence to understand their messages and make changes in harmony with those demands. A crisis is not solved by staying in the same place, it is overcome by outlining new behaviors after understanding what our internal voice signals. You can start by making small daily modifications; something simple that allows you to break the routine. Small changes will sooner or later bring a greater variation in your life. The one that finally provides what you need. So that, reflect on what decisions you should make to feel better and generate a more exciting future project.

6. Practice gratitude

To overcome an existential crisis, it is advisable to make changes, set new goals and, also, be grateful for what we have and that gives us meaning.. Because sometimes, we forget about those little things whose beauty we do not see due to the domination of stress and the demon of anguish.

Practicing gratitude means remembering, for example, how much we love our loved ones. It also implies knowing how to appreciate the simplest realities, such as a walk through nature, reading, a hug that breaks fears, a caress that comforts, a landscape that inspires. Find a balance between what you want to achieve without forgetting what you already have and that is priceless.

Meeting new people is beneficial to overcome an existential crisis

We have all gone through moments dominated by crisis, by those days when the gaze pays attention to its surroundings with detachment and skepticism. It is not a pleasant experience, it is clear. One way to overcome confusion is to spend time with people who bring new perspectives, interests and hopes.

There is nothing as magical as building friendships, those that stimulate neurons and provide knowledge and motivation. Avoid, therefore, falling into perpetual isolation, putting up walls to protect yourself from a world that is incomprehensible. Open yourself to others and get to know other voices, other faces and minds capable of helping you overcome existential crises. Change is always possible.

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