20+ Women who refused to follow beauty standards and stopped dyeing their hair gray

Gray hair is usually associated with old age or lack of care, an aspect present in those who do not know how to “take care of themselves”. However, there are women who, after an acceptance process, decided to share their story on the Instagram account Gombre, showing how their hair, whatever color it may be, does not define who they are. On the contrary: they are just a synonym for different life experiences.

O awesome.club collected testimonials from some of these women of different ages who decided to proudly show off the beauty of their gray or completely white hair.

“I realized I had white hair in my late teens, but I didn’t pay much attention to it at the time. Fast forward to my early 30s, after two kids and gray hairs sprouting up everywhere!

I’m slowly learning to accept that I shouldn’t see myself as I did 20 years ago, as I’m no longer that person. My gray hair is part of who I am now. All my joys and sufferings these past 47 years.”

“I discovered that I had high metal toxicity, high levels of lead, mercury and gadolinium. I was told to do a complete detox, not to use anything that had a lot of chemicals, including certain lotions. Also, they recommended that I stop using hair dye.

Three years later, I’m really happy with my gray hair. I get more compliments now than when I dyed them. And it’s so liberating not having to paint. I’m almost 57 years old and I’m my most authentic being. I made peace with everything. It was a complete trip, but I love my gray hairs and I don’t think about eliminating them”.

“10 years ago my husband spent 8 and a half months in the hospital recovering his breath, his voice and his ability to eat solid food. Then we began a year in which my care at home and the great help of an orthopedic crane were our life. I was 56 years old, and when I finally looked at myself, I saw that my gray-tinged brown curls had turned to a striking glossy white.

I went to a hairdresser and luckily he convinced me to ‘go with the flow’. And I did it. I love my shiny silver hair, I get so many compliments and questions about how I managed to get it so beautiful. I usually just smile and say, ‘Maybe it’s luck.’ I had to learn to fit a different value system in my wardrobe, but I find finding new color combinations an exciting challenge.”

“I am currently 24 years old. I found my first white thread when I was 11, but recently my mom said she found one when I was 8! Since February 2020 I’ve been letting them grow. I’m destined to be a silver sister, why resist?

In March 2020, it became evident that it was time. After a few months, I bleached the ends of my front lock and am waiting for my white hair to dye it.”

“In December 2016, I was 42 years old with an 11-month-old baby and complained about my ‘disrespectful’ lock of white hair, where I needed to apply henna. Well, a few months later, in May 2017, I still hadn’t dyed the strands. And my gray hairs got bigger.

I was on vacation with my husband’s family, locked in the bathroom for a marathon hair wash. After finishing, I looked at the jars and thought of my family, of the two hours I had wasted that I could have spent with my one and a half year old son. And I thought of the two extra hours I’d have to spend applying the dye, waiting, rinsing, conditioning, and tidying up. I was tired. At that point, I was fed up. And without knowing it, my gray hair journey had officially begun.

I am so glad I made this decision as I love my silver hair and feel comfortable in my own skin. My co-workers were right: I’m 48 years old and my hair will gray before I hit 50!”

“My confidence seems to dissipate very quickly, like when my boyfriend, a professional photographer, wants to take pictures of me with analogue film. I know there’s no quick preview of images as they’re being taken, no corrections or second chances.

This is me trying to stop him. I wasn’t wearing makeup, I’d had a bad day with my hair, and I felt tired. I thought a lot about whether or not to share this image. While I feel confident in my own skin and don’t need to hide my ‘imperfections’, it feels ‘too natural, too real, too imperfect to me’. When I see this photo, I remember our moment in the park. He said I looked beautiful and I wouldn’t let him take pictures of me because that day, for some reason, I didn’t believe it myself.”

“My mom found my first white hair when I was 12 (I didn’t even know this was possible!). She always warned me that they would probably start showing earlier than most, but I didn’t know I’d be so young… As I grew up, the gray streak at the tip of my head became harder and harder to cover. My beloved hairdresser convinced me to accept her and stop dying my hair gray at age 24.

Now I’ve been letting them grow out for two years and sometimes I do a few light highlights to match because I’m not entirely gray. I am learning to integrate them more and more each day. Nobody believes you have so many gray hairs at 26! I am a teacher and my students are perplexed. I just blame them for stressing me out. But who I should really blame, or rather thank, is my mother.”

“I stopped dyeing it in February 2019 and had patiently waited for it to grow long enough to show up in a photo. I’ve always associated gray hair with negative terms like being old, untidy, giving up. I dyed mine for years, trying to fight time, to look ‘younger’ and ‘better’ with darker hair.

To think that I could love myself with everything and gray hair, as a 51-year-old woman with white hair, seemed unattainable. Many people close to me, including my husband and some of my dearest friends, urged me to keep dyeing. They said I looked ‘better’ with dark hair and that I should wait until I was older to stop using the dye. I almost followed your advice. Until one of those friends showed me, seriously, an Instagram account.

I feel comfortable and empowered as I let go of the need to see myself a certain way and instead accept my change as a reflection of my growing wisdom. I love those silver highlights. And now I know that I can love and have compassion for those around me if I first love and have compassion for myself.”

“Twenty-four weeks on my gray path. See the weariness in my eyes? I realized a long time ago that they revealed just about everything. An epiphany like that at such a young age served to make me a particularly honest person. As time went on, honesty became habitual and comfortable (thankfully) and I realized it was a very simple way to live.

But the thought of dishonesty was so uncomfortable that when people complimented me on my black hair, I would start explaining and stammering that it was dyed and that it really wasn’t mine. Hopefully now I’m able to just say ‘thank you’ to anyone who likes the gray in my hair. What a joy it will be to get rid of this weight I have placed on myself.”

“Hello, I’m Jaqueline Bergrós, I’m 30 years old and I’m a musical actress in Germany. I had my first white hair when I was 18 years old. At the moment I don’t think much about it. At 21, I started coloring my hair regularly. At 25, I needed to dye it every 3 weeks.

They said I was too young to have gray hairs. But I was constantly asked if I had a disability or genetic defect. Either way, it was clear to me and everyone else that I needed to hide them. No one was supposed to know I had white hair ‘very young’. Especially at my new job. I was working on stage and needed to have a profile for auditions. Who would like to see a Jasmine with white hair in Aladdin🇧🇷 I was ready to put up with more allergic reactions, breakage and hair loss. I thought it was ‘normal’. And the faster I painted them, the more visible my whites became. Today I know: my white hair wants to be seen.

On March 5, 2020 I dyed my hair for the last time and so I decided that my health is more important than having my mane of brown hair. I don’t want to hide it and lock myself in a prison any longer. I was too afraid to show myself as I am, mainly because of the negative reactions.

Ever since I grew my gray hair out, I’ve gotten a lot of compliments and great admiration. I shine in a new light because it just is me. I decided to take this trip and I don’t regret a single day. I can’t wait until it’s colorless and gray to the tips.”

“My name is Alex and I haven’t dyed my hair since June 2017. I decided to stop doing it because, as my gray hairs grew, I needed to do a touch up every week. I don’t usually spend a lot on myself, so it was a simple decision. I was excited to go down that path and see who I would become and what I would look like with gray hair.

It’s been a fabulous adventure so far. Coming to terms with my gray hairs has been very powerful and freeing. I learned to accept and love my imperfections. My motto is: imperfection is perfection. We are who we are because of the things we have to face and discovering who we are is an immeasurable gift to ourselves.”

“I am rebelling. I’m letting my hair stay its natural color. I’m tired of having to go paint it every three weeks and I’d rather use the money for other things. I wasn’t sure I was going to like it. When confronted with gray hair, thoughts came to me that I was old, that I hadn’t gotten what I wanted, that time flew by and things like that. It’s liberating! I saved a lot of time and money by not dyeing it.

Obviously, we get older and time seems to fly, but accepting gray hairs means accepting myself, at least for me. It means that I had my achievements, that I surrounded myself with true joy and hope to offer things that are of value and have meaning for others”.

“At 40, I wore dreadlocks and was getting ready to move from the United States in search of a job opportunity, when a friend told me that I had some gray hair that needed to be dyed and that she would pay me to do it. For fun, I accepted the proposal.