Home » Romance Advice » 16 clear signs that your ex wants to get back with you but does not openly show it –

16 clear signs that your ex wants to get back with you but does not openly show it –

. After a breakup, it is common for one of the two to feel curious and want to get back together, but don’t dare to say it.

Those desires can confuse both of you: is it worth staying apart? Could you try it again?

If you don’t know if the way your ex acts is out of love or a disorder of your emotions, look for these 16 signs that your ex wants to come back but doesn’t show it:

1. He gets nostalgic

This is a typical effect of every ending, it happens that when we are about to say goodbye to something or someone, suddenly affection arises and it becomes difficult to say goodbye. Like when you hated high school, but on the last day of school, when you knew I wasn’t coming back, you suddenly didn’t want to leave.

The same goes for a job, vacation, and even people.

If your ex suddenly texts you – particularly at night or after a beer or two – and is looking to start a conversation, about your relationship and your good memories, that’s a clear sign that he’s interested in you again.

A man who has moved on emotionally does not write messages to his ex. Nostalgia is a very powerful emotion and can cloud our judgment. If you also feel the pull of resources, be careful. Try to objectively analyze what they experienced. It is important to move forward.

2. You find it everywhere

The possibilities of meeting events by chance are limited in our world. Even if you both had a lot of interests in common, it’s unlikely that you’ll run into your ex everywhere you go.

If you go places and find your ex there, if it happens frequently, it may not be a coincidence at all. Most likely, he will be aware of your plans, research your new routines, and find a way to meet you to continue meeting.

These actions have a goal: he wants to know where you are because he misses being with you. A person who goes out of his way to share with you will rarely do so without having deep feelings for you. He definitely wants to come back.

Beware of revenge

There’s another possibility that explains why you run into your ex so much: Depending on how bitter your breakup may have been, perhaps he’s looking to control you or get revenge by showing how fine he is without you.

Even if that is the reason, a man who is really over his relationship would hardly make that much effort to be close to you, even if it is to get revenge.

In these cases, be careful. If he wants to brag about his “happiness,” he can ruin your plans and give you a hard time. If he wants to know where you are because he is jealous and wants to control you, then he might seek you out to prevent you from meeting new people.

3. Walks through life like a hurt puppy

Although it is not something that makes them look good in public, after a breakup some feel the need to publish the lyrics of a song or an image on social networks that expresses the sadness they feel. Those messages are always for someone, even if they don’t say their name.

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If your ex has their social media loaded with these messages, they definitely want you or the people you have in common to notice their sadness and let you know that they miss you.

He may also act that way in person. That is to say that he tells the friends he has in common how bad he feels, or that he shows you himself that he is sad when he sees you. Those actions are definitely a sign that he is not over you and would like to try again.

This can also be a clue that he wants your attention and doesn’t know what to do to get it. Maybe he’s too nervous to approach you after everything that happened or he’s too proud to admit he was wrong.

Be careful if you become a victim

Another possibility is that he vents his sadness because he wants to keep up a sad boy show so that he can be seen as the victim of the breakup. You probably look to other people for comfort. He makes his pain public to present himself as a good boy and attract other girls.

4. He got a new girlfriend in record time

Maybe calling her “girlfriend” is wrong. If almost immediately after ending the relationship he shows a new woman in her life, something sounds strange. It may be difficult for you to see him happy in a new relationship, but you should think that it is unlikely to be a real relationship.

A breakup can be so difficult for a man to handle that he decides to hide his feelings and looks for a new woman to take refuge in so as not to feel pain. It’s not that he loves her, it’s that he uses her to avoid dealing with the consequences and anguish he feels when he thinks about you.

This method of burying your head in the sand a little is only effective in the short term. It’s not something that will last long.

5. He calls or texts you drunk

Sometimes we joke that a good friend is the one who takes your cell phone away when you’re drunk. Honestly, it’s necessary.

When you drink, you lose inhibition and that can cause you to reveal some of the feelings you are trying to hide. If your ex fires you emotional messages and calls when he’s drunk, it’s something to think about.

Alcohol is not a truth serum, it does not suddenly transform us into noble creatures who act guided by honesty. What it does is turn up the volume on our feelings and remove the filter when we express them. Some of those emotions are valid, others not so much.

If your ex starts looking for you after a couple of drinks, you should evaluate whether those moments of weakness and disinhibition are honest and reflect feelings to which you should pay attention.

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6. You want to recap everything about your relationship

No person who is truly over their relationship wants to recap and reminisce with their ex all the times they had together. In order to move forward, both must let go of the past.

So if your ex is looking for excuses to start conversations about their past, it’s a clear sign that they’re not over you. Even if your ex asks you for this conversation to achieve “closure,” you should think carefully before accepting his proposal and talking to him.

Evaluate if you still have things to talk about, if you can really learn from this conversation or if, on the contrary, it is most likely that you will end up reliving painful memories or that he will take advantage of it to try to win you over again.

On the other hand, if enough time has passed and you are trusting, sometimes memories about your relationship and especially your breakup can help you understand what you felt and why things happened.

7. He is angry with you

This situation is similar to the previous one, with the difference that it comes with antagonism as an extra ingredient.

Every time he talks to you, he finds a way to fight. He seems incapable of maintaining a civil conversation. Sometimes, out of nowhere, he reacts explosively and acts irritable whenever they meet.

If you start to see this behavior, it is a strong indication that there are still unresolved feelings for him and he reacts violently because he does not know how to handle the frustration of your separation. It’s definitely an indicator that he’s interested in you, and also that he wants to come back.

In this case, you should not give it the attention it really deserves. You don’t deserve negativity from anyone in your life, or to be blamed for a painful breakup. Although this behavior could seek reconciliation, nothing good comes from relationships that are based on resentment.

You must choose your battles well. You are already facing your own process to heal after the breakup, so it should be your priority. Many times, these constant arguments get you nowhere and are not healthy for either of you. Make sure you take care of yourself.

8. He brags (too much) about how fabulous his new life is.

There is a phrase from the movie The Godfather that we like a lot: “Trust is silent. Insecurities are loud.”

No one who truly trusts themselves and their life feels the need to show it off in other people’s faces. A guy who splashes his social media with everything he does and shouts from the rooftops how happy he is, he is a desperate guy.

Photos of him with attractive women, dancing from party to party and making his life one big exhibition. They are all transparent attempts to get attention.

If you were in a real, meaningful relationship with someone who now seems to be throwing their happy life in your face, remember that these actions are a result of pain. Your ex suffers and tries to hide it. He’s probably desperate to prove that he “didn’t lose” in the breakup.

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9. Your friends suddenly start to take an interest in your life

This is typical since preschool: a boy asks another classmate to ask one of the girls if she likes him. This pattern repeats itself constantly throughout our lives. Breakups are no exception.

If your ex’s friends, even those who didn’t show much interest in your life, are suddenly curious and asking how you are doing, they’re probably doing them a favor to find out how your life is going now that you’re single.

Your ex wants to know if you are thinking about him and especially if you are already planning to date someone else. That is one way to keep an eye on you. It is best to be very careful with what you say to these mutual friends.

If you’re interested in getting back together with him, allowing those friends to give him positive reports can be an easy way to lay the groundwork. If you don’t want to revisit those waters, make sure you don’t tell those friends anything that would make them think you want to get back into the relationship.

Just focus on yourself and what’s best for you. If he wants to get back with you and uses his friends to get information, you should only reveal what you want them to know.

10. He maintains a lot of communication with you

A simple “how are you?” It may be the best way to start a conversation. Especially if it is from someone with whom you at some point had a high level of trust and shared love.

But it’s also the kind of conversation that can quickly turn into something much deeper and more engaging. If your ex contacts you a lot and expresses too much interest in you, it’s a major clue that he can’t get you off his mind. He surely wants to come back.

Remember that when you break up with someone, you not only lose a romantic relationship, you also lose a friend. And he’s not just any best friend, he’s probably the best of the best. Sometimes, approaching you in this way is due to the need for comfort, relief and well-being.

However, these types of actions should not be taken only from this side, as it is often a sign that your ex is not doing so well without you.

By finding a kind and understanding way to start a conversation with you, he may be showing you that he wants you back in his life.

11. He becomes a jealous monster

There’s a reason so many romantic comedies feature a sequence where someone tries too hard to make their ex jealous. It’s a universal emotion that anyone could relate to, and honestly, it’s pretty irresistible.

Many times people are dazzled by the idea that someone is possessive of them, since this would indicate a very intense and passionate attachment, but it is not something to take lightly if it can harm you.

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