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Words of Affirmation: What is this Love Language and How to Demonstrate It

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Consider these people the kings and queens of compliments.

  • What does it mean if your love language is words of affirmation?
  • Signs that your love language is words of affirmation
  • Examples of affirmation words
  • Relationship tips if your or your partner’s love language is words of affirmation
  • If words of affirmation are your love language

When it comes to relationships, each person builds connections differently. Some enjoy romantic dates, some like to show their love with Instagram photo captions, and others shower themselves with gifts whenever possible. So we understand the fact that how these people show their affection can be broken down by love languages.

The phrase comes from the book by Gary Chapman, PhD, written in 1992: The Five Love Languages: How to Express a Sincere Commitment to Your Spouse. And for those who don’t know, these love languages ​​are very important when it comes to creating a lasting and healthy relationship.

Basically, Gary says that people “speak” one of five love languages ​​which are: words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, physical touch and gifts. These love languages ​​reveal how you show your love and how you want to receive love.

So obviously the first step before anything else is take a love language test (free!) to find out what your love language is. Once you know your language, you can learn the best way to show your love and understand when your partner is expressing their own affection.

WHAT IS YOUR LOVE LANGUAGE? TAKE OUR TEST AND FIND OUT NOW!

If you find that you rank high for words of affirmation, well, this article is for you. You will understand what this love language means and how to demonstrate it with many examples and relationship tips; here’s everything you need to know if you or your partner have this love language of words of affirmation.

Oh! And if you are interested in seeing the meaning of the other Love Languages ​​and how to demonstrate them, just click on one of the options in the list below:

  • Quality Time
  • physical touch
  • receive gifts
  • Acts of Service

SEE ALSO: HOW TO CONTROL JEALOUSY. 12 TIPS THAT WORK FOR EVERYONE!

What does it mean if your love language is words of affirmation?

As you may have guessed, this love language is word-centric. “Words of affirmation can be spoken or written words that are supportive and empathetic,” explains licensed marriage family therapist Yasmina Quinterno: “It’s recognizing, identifying, and valuing a person’s behavior, contributions, successes, or challenges. .”

We’ll look at some more specific examples and ideas below, but in short, people with this love language are big fans of heartfelt conversation and praise – both giving and receiving.

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“For these people, words are more important than actions,” explains certified sex educator and relationship expert, Apolo Seabra.

And before you think words of affirmation are “bad” or “unnecessary” love language, experts agree that it’s actually the opposite. “People who have this love language are usually the ones who pay the most attention and also care about the little details of other people’s lives,” says Apolo.

As someone whose love language is words of affirmation, I can attest that a simple compliment or an “I love you” makes my day. On the other hand, I often express my admiration and gratitude by doing things like texting my parents good morning. And yes, I’m 100% that person who always keeps handwritten cards from people I love.

SEE ALSO: HOW TO CONTROL JEALOUSY. 12 TIPS THAT WORK FOR EVERYONE!

Signs that your love language is words of affirmation

Words of affirmation are one of the easiest love languages ​​to identify, says Apollo. Not only do you like to hear a verbal “I love you” verbally, but you probably like to hear why your partner loves you.

Some other signs could be that you appreciate it when your partner notices that you’ve changed your appearance, you enjoy choosing the perfect birthday card for someone, and love songs hit you really hard. Apollo says that you probably also like to send love phrases to your partner and/or express your admiration through social media.

On the other hand, having an unsatisfying conversation, not being congratulated, thanked or validated verbally, or being the target of nasty words is extremely upsetting for someone with this love language.

SEE ALSO: 93 QUESTIONS FOR BOYFRIEND TO ANSWER

Examples of affirmation words

When it comes to love languages, most people find words of affirmation relatively simple to master. Here are some things you can say and do for your partner whose love language is words of affirmation:

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  • Simply say, “I love you.”
  • And then explain what and why you love him.
  • Express how you feel about him every day.
  • Tell him in detail how proud you are of him for something specific that only he does.
  • Say, “I’m so blessed to be with you.”
  • Congratulate him on victories big and small, from getting a job promotion to scoring a perfect goal on the first try.
  • Compliment the hair, the clothes, the perfume, the smile, the intelligence – well… you get the idea.
  • Thank him for doing something for you or your family.
  • Familiarize yourself with handwritten cards and be sure to send your partner birthday phrases every year.
  • Write little love phrases on cards and spread around the house saying everything you love about him.
  • Write motivational quotes and put it in your bag or wallet before work to encourage you on an important day.
  • Keep the cards and notes he gives you because his words probably really come from the heart.
  • Post a cute photo with a special caption on social media on his birthday.
  • Give him verbal validation and praise often, especially when he’s having a rough day.
  • Compliment her nails or clothes or how blue her eyes look particularly that day.
  • Send love messages during the day to remind him that you are thinking of him.
  • Tell him how and why he inspires you and what you admire about him.
  • Recognize when he does something good or impressive and point out what he does well, especially when he is doing it.
  • Tell him when he makes you feel good (both in and out of the bedroom), that you are attracted to him and that you appreciate him.
  • Focus on positive words and communication, even in difficult times. Remember: every word carries a lot of weight for him, so always think before you speak.
  • Avoid negative comments and accusations, as insults can have a strong and lasting impact on people whose love language is words of affirmation.
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Relationship tips if your or your partner’s love language is words of affirmation

As with any relationship, whether you have the same or different love languages, communication is key. If you are not able to express your feelings and emotions effectively, things will not move forward or prosper.

So the first step is “identify your partner’s love language and constantly speak that language” says Apollo. Not only does this help you to better understand each other’s needs, but using each other’s love languages ​​can actually help foster growth, as love languages ​​”help us understand how to communicate love to our partner and how they communicate love,” explains Dr.

If you and your partner have discovered your love languages ​​and one of you says “words of affirmation,” here’s what to keep in mind:

SEE ALSO: HOW TO DEVELOP A RELATIONSHIP BASED ON LOVE AND RESPECT

If your partner’s love language is words of affirmation:

Very simple: he wants you to give him reassurance, validation, and support with your words, and most importantly, he wants you to be sincere in what you say. “It’s very easy for partners with words of affirmation as their love language to identify compliments and false comments,” Apolo says. “My number one advice is to make sure that if you say something to your partner, it’s from your heart. If you say random things or make things up, he’ll know you’re not being authentic.”

Empathizing with his feelings helps a lot, as does pep talk when he’s feeling down and thanking or praising him as much as possible. Don’t just assume that your partner knows you care – tell him often.

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If you’re having trouble remembering to give a positive verbal affirmation, Apollo suggests setting a daily reminder on your phone to send him a WhatsApp message or even send him funny memes. “Get several ‘thinking of you’ cards and send one a month to your partner, or grab some dry-erase pens and write ‘I love you’ on the bathroom mirror,” she suggests. Before you know it, you will be speaking their language.

SEE ALSO: 50 RELATIONSHIP PHRASES THAT WILL REMIND YOU TO NEVER GIVE UP ON LOVE

If words of affirmation are your love language:

You need to use your words to let your partner know. Because couples often have different love languages, if your partner doesn’t know which words or words make you feel loved, he may not think about using them. Also, even if your partner knows your love language, Apollo says he might not be as specific in expressing his feelings or noticing the little things, so be patient and forgive.

“As with any relationship, feeling appreciated and understood is very important,” explains Apolo. “It means so much more to people with words of affirmation as their love language.” So if your partner says something that hurts you, try to explain why without getting defensive. It is likely that he did not necessarily realize the weight of his words.

Finally, it is important to note that your love language may change from time to time depending on the situation. After a bad day, you might want a hug instead of pep talk or simply spending quality time together. Apollo says that it comes down to communicating with your partner and both talking about what they need at the moment.

SEE ALSO: GIFT LOVE LANGUAGE: WHAT IT MEANS AND HOW TO SHOW IT

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