It is not uncommon for us to look back and realize that there was a time when we were not conformists. We dreamed of going far, we wanted to make our life memorable. But something happened and at some point, we changed course.
We become conformists for various reasons: due to dependence on other people, low self-esteem, lack of motivation or fear of something… One or more of these factors limit our personal development and growth and prevent us from crossing the threshold of what is “fair and necessary.”
Each person, in fact, can take on life the way they want and it could be said that everything starts from there. Some will do little, some will do a lot, and others will do just what is necessary. to go through life on the sly, without getting too involved in any major matter.
“In case after case, we see that conformity is the easy way…”
–Noam Chomsky–
The “extra” or added value in any aspect of life (that is, doing more out of a desire to be better) is what makes the difference. Because that added value or that plus, apart from being a way of modifying the environment, of imprinting its own stamp on existence, is also what defines the destiny of each person: its scope and its limitations.
Conformists for doing strictly what is necessary
Being conformist is closely related to the level of interest and demand that we apply to ourselves. Only those who strive to achieve the highest goals manage to build a life that flourishes with every step. On the other hand, doing what is strictly necessary is simply giving up the best of existence.
Certainly, Many times we do not give ourselves the opportunity, or the gift, of trying to answer a simple and enigmatic question: how far can we go? What lies at the bottom of this attitude is, above all, a lack of self-confidence and fear of making a difference. Something that translates into laziness or disinterest, thus configuring the basis on which a life “without salt or sugar” is built.
Of course, it’s not about doing more than you should, just because. Sometimes trying to do more, you do less. As the old popular adage says: “he who encompasses much, takes little.” What it is about is putting a touch of excellence in everything we do daily, no matter how small. To give value to our actions, because in each one of them we are leaving a mark of our passage through the world.
Let others do…
There are people who resist growing. They know that continuing to act like children is something that brings great limitations, but also many benefits. One of them, the fact that they never have to be confronted with the anguish of making decisions, solving problems or taking responsibility for mistakes.
It doesn’t matter if a person is old: sometimes they still behave like a child. One of the aspects in which this is most reflected is in that attitude of “letting others do.” In every uncomfortable or compromising situation, they will allow others to take the lead. They don’t want to be the ones to carry the burden: that’s what others are for.
Clearly, living off what others do makes us conformist and can lead us to the point of nullifying our capabilities and potential. These only emerge when life itself puts us face to face with demanding circumstances.
The curious thing is that The more the responsibilities and risks of living are delegated to others, the more distrust grows within us regarding what we are capable of doing. Thus a vicious circle is set up. The bad thing is that in this “letting others do” we can also be letting go of the most intense and constructive emotions and experiences in life.
Low self-esteem and lack of motivation
When we have a low level of self-esteem or a low level of motivation, we tend to fall into conformism. On the one hand, because we do not believe we are capable of doing a certain task and on the other, because we do not have that drive or energy that is necessary, and even essential, to start or continue with any project.
An example that works very well is that of children. Many people, by acquiring the responsibility of having people under their care, also acquire a motivation that pushes them to create and build. It is at that moment, precisely, when they stop being conformist, at least in this aspect. Sometimes an extreme situation also becomes a motivation: you know that if you don’t do something, you will sink. Therefore, major crossroads do not always bring negative consequences.
For this, Self-esteem and motivation go hand in hand, and can be determining factors in the level of conformity of any person.. Someone who does not believe in themselves or who does not have that extra push to do and create will surely lack the courage or courage to achieve goals above what is strictly necessary.
You might be interested…