Why can’t a psychologist assist friends and relatives?

It is very common for someone I know or a relative to ask me if they can go to therapy with me, I always say that it is not possible. But people don’t understand why and that’s why I wrote this text.

Why can’t a psychologist assist friends and relatives?

The Regional Council of Psychology says: “The decision for the service rests with the psychologist, who will consider whether the service will negatively interfere with the objectives of the service provided, since there is nothing in the regulation that specifically prohibits the service of family members. and/or acquaintances.”

That is, it is at the discretion of the psychologist and his theoretical approach. In my consultations, I use analytically based psychotherapy, which in order to have a good analytical encounter, it is necessary that you do not have a family or friend bond. Because? Well, it’s very simple, I’ll illustrate an example of what it would be like to care for a patient-friend/relative.

An example

Imagine that “So-and-so” is a longtime friend, we go through some situations and stories in common, suddenly he comes to ask for my psychologist services and I say that I will assist him.

When we started the therapy we would have an image of what each one of us is like, so I would have some blind spots to be analyzed. It might ask some intimate questions that he wouldn’t feel comfortable answering, as sometimes it might reflect his friendship with me.

In analytically based psychotherapy, the issue of projection and transference is very important, that is, placing in the other what is mine or what I deny in myself, and feelings and emotions deposited in the psychologist. In therapy, patients constantly project onto the psychologist and this projection is very important for analysis.

When we already have a contact, the transfer process takes place, but it is not as significant as if we were to meet someone we do not know. Because it also involves the psychologist’s feeling – which we call countertransference – towards the patient and when there is contact outside the therapeutic setting, the quality of the psychologist’s vision is lost.

Finally, I would like to say that in my view, care with acquaintances and family members is not effective, but the psychologist can have a conversation as a friend and not as an analyst.

Also read – 10 signs that the psychology professional is not good

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