When impulsiveness destroys us

Impulsivity usually causes us to perform actions that we usually regret. Almost always self-destructive actions.

What are the benefits of being impulsive? It seems like there aren’t too many, quite the opposite. Impulsivity harms both us and those around us. The worst of all is that it is something unconscious and later, we regret our sayings or actions, but we cannot go back in time.

Thus, It is so important to learn to control our impulses and think a little more.

If as soon as someone tells you something, you react and answer them wrong… if they are asking you a question and you say the first thing that comes to mind… if you are the first to start an argument, if when something goes wrong, you throw things on the floor or you start yelling and throwing tantrums like children, perhaps you are having an impulsivity problem.

Don’t feel bad, everything in this life has a solution (except death, as they say popularly). First of all It is good to understand that being impulsive from time to time is not bad, because it could help us not be so shy or introverted, to get what we want and to make ourselves heard. However, The problem lies when impulsivity is the rule and not the exception.

There are different types of impulsive or compulsive people. Among the latter, for example, those who buy without need and accumulate clothes and objects in their homes. We will not focus on that in this article, but on another way to channel or react to emotions.

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That is, when we use anger, anger, nerves or crying, if something does not go as we want or expect, or if we do not know how to solve a problem.

With our way of expressing ourselves we can convey many things. And we don’t always say the good with our words or attitudes. Perhaps, we do not have the bad intention of bothering or hurting the other, but we end up doing it.

If you are one of those who throw the stone at the first stimulus, if you answer before analyzing the situation well, if the initial reaction is to get angry or fight, if you feel clouded by anger and when you feel very angry, you only think about being hurtful , in taking revenge or in screaming… be careful, because Impulsiveness can play tricks on you.

You don’t have to make any excuses: “I’m stressed“, “I did it without thinking“, “I have a lot of problems“, “the economic crisis is hurting me“, “I am impulsive by nature“, “I am having my menstrual period“, etc. Face the situation and accept that you have an impulsive problem. That is the first step.

Next, it’s time for action, not reaction. This means that, If your first reflex action when faced with a stimulus that is not entirely good is to counterattack, you better wait.

The technique of counting to ten (or to twenty, thirty, one hundred…) or taking a deep breath may work for you. Whatever helps you not answer or shout, in the first second after the other person finished speaking.

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What is this for? Well, not to say the first thing that comes to mind, which many times is not the most appropriate or correct thing to do.

Sometimes letting two seconds pass doesn’t mean you can’t continue the conversation. or that you have not understood something, but that you need time to process the information. You may give your mind a lot of credit for being faster than light, but that’s not always a good thing.

When you put things in perspective, everything is better. When you take the time to analyze other people’s words and your own, you can achieve better results.

When you let the impulse not be the first thing to come out of your mouth or your body, you predispose yourself in a different way. When you think before you speak and measure your words, then you can reach a successful conclusion.

To finish, I leave you a nice reflection:

“Always think about what you will do before acting. Do not allow impulsiveness to dominate you or your path will be full of darkness.”