Happiness will knock on your door when you are ready to receive it

When one assumes, understands and internalizes that one deserves to be happy, life makes its way, the days orchestrate new opportunities, the locks are opened and the enemies become pillars of salt that the wind carries behind them. Nothing can stop us when we perceive ourselves as deserving of joy and no one has a voice to surround our wills with fear.

Emily Dickinson said very correctly in her poems that People ignore their own height until we stand up.. The most curious thing about all this is that it is often our own education, society and the people around us who generally tend to prefer us sitting, submissive, quiet and obedient.

In fact, this is what happened to the Massachusetts poet, whose disappointments, fears and sadness ended up secluding her in her own room in the family home in Amherst, becoming little more than a warm shadow, in a very thin figure that the neighbors saw through the windows. Of the 1800 poems written by her, she only saw a dozen published in her lifetime and of the people who made up her life, she only loved one of them, but neither of them was brave enough to give the passed.

They were other times, there is no doubt. It was different mentalities, it is clear. However, as curious as it may seem, The complex universe of emotions, insecurities and lack of self-confidence is a refrain that never goes out of style.. It is like a moviola that never stops, that brings us the magic of an occasion and that lets it go, that teaches us what happiness is and soon takes it away, leaving us with the desire, the sorrows, the memory and the regret. .

Regret for not having dared to do “something more”for not having fought, for not feeling worthy of that unrepeatable opportunity, for not having gathered enough courage for that lost love…

You deserve a better life

Ana has started going to the gym because she wants to lead a healthier life. He goes every day from 7:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m., but he still smokes two packs of tobacco a day. Carlos lost his job 9 months ago. He goes out every day to write resumes but when he returns home he begins to eat compulsively, so much so that his physical change is already very striking.. Marta ended a very stormy emotional relationship a month ago, and since then, she has become hooked on Internet dating sites with the obsessive idea of ​​finding the “ideal partner.”

All of these examples can be summarized in a central idea that will be familiar to all of us: while we find balance in one area of ​​our life, in another, we regress at an alarming rate. It’s as if we don’t quite understand that we deserve a better life, and this often pushes us to stop taking care of ourselves in a fuller, more complete way. Why do we do it? Why don’t we finish assuming authentic control of our reality to achieve well-being?

The answer to this question must be sought not only in our past, but in our own inability to take care of ourselves, to promote psychological well-being and above all, to manage our own emotions. In the three proposed examples we have seen that each of these people carries out some correct actions: one goes to the gym, the other looks for a job every day and the last has ended an unhappy and complex relationship.

However, The rest of the behaviors shape these common black holes: anxiety, uncertainty, fear of the future, the inability to be alone, addiction to some substance... We all know that we deserve a better life, but we do not know how to attend to our authentic needs, those that reside in a more intimate, deeper layer of our being…

You might be interested…

Trust yourself, because being happy is not a necessity, it is a right.

Life will bring us more opportunities only if we put one foot after the other and go out to look for them. Happiness will knock on our door only if we are receptive, if we are attentive, prepared and above all… willing. Because Those who let themselves be carried away by fears and insecurities will shipwreck on the island of lost opportunities.. Because whoever gives in to disappointments will sooner or later choose the same physical and mental confinement that Emily Dickinson herself inflicted on herself.

In these times when we find happiness pills in the form of beautiful phrases on Twitter and Facebook, there is something that we should never lose sight of. Something that the detractors of positive psychology remind us very accurately: We must learn to accept painful experiences, no matter how hard they are. A dismissal, a disappointment or a failure is something that one must “swallow” no matter what… Now, once we have dived into that chaotic abyss that is negative emotions, it is time to emerge, and we will do so being stronger. Feeling more valid.

Even more, in this complex and demanding day to day life we ​​must internalize that people not only deserve to feel good, to be calm, to experience satisfaction, freedom, triumph and the taste of joy. All these dimensions are actually RIGHTS. Because It doesn’t matter what our history is, or where we come from, or who we are… We all have the full right to be happy and choose the way to be happy.

You might be interested…