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What should I do if my partner is always playing video games?

That your partner is a “gamer” and loves spending time with video games is normal. The problem comes when you feel that he neglects you. What can you do?

«My partner won’t stop playing video games». This is a phrase that many people utter and that often hides a more serious problem than it first appears. It is true that this type of resources (video games) stand as powerful entertainment and that in certain cases they can even provide psychological benefits.

Likewise, there is another fact: There are many couples in which both are authentic gamersthat is, passionate about video games and consoles. However, even in these circumstances, there is always one of the two who shows a more intense predilection for spending time in front of the screen and with a controller in hand. Arguments, disagreements, reproaches and even ultimatums are the most common problems.

The dynamics that occur within a relationship When someone spends most of their time on one activity, neglecting the person they love, it takes its toll.. Thus, far from being the classic problem between couples millennials, It is a reality that is frequently appreciated and that is worth analyzing.

My partner doesn’t stop playing video games: what should I take into account?

It defines them and also them. While it is true that when someone says that my partner doesn’t stop playing video games we instantly visualize a young man with a console, the truth is that Women also have this same passion and interest.

There is another interesting fact and that is that the fact that someone complains that their boyfriend or spouse spends a lot of time with this practice is not something that is socially perceived as worrying.

There is no shortage of those who point out that “it would be worse if I drank alcohol” or even more, «At least he’s at home and not somewhere else.”. These are not response formulas, these expressions harm and do not help. So, something we must consider is that If there is something important in a relationship, it is the time that is shared together.. Quality and meaningful time, and not on the same couch where one of them is present, but absent.

Video game addiction is one of the relationship problems that is often underestimated, however, it affects the relationship significantly.

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When this situation continues over time and there are no changes, the relationship suffers fractures. Far from minimizing the impact that video games can have on a relationship, it is something that requires greater interest and understanding. Let’s delve into some facts that we should keep in mind.

How do you feel when your partner spends excessive time with this hobby?

We can reach a deal with our partner, such as dedicating a limited time to video games and then being able to do things together: watch a series, go out to dinner, talk… However, in the end we realize that this is not possible. complies. When the same behavior is repeated day after day and there are no changes, it is common to experience a series of psycho-emotional realities:

You feel ignored.You often wonder if it is more important for your partner to spend time in front of a console instead of living life with you. You feel despised and even unloved.You expect changes that do not appear.Disappointment when you see that many of the things you plan are not fulfilled: going out to dinner, going to the movies, watching that series you have pending… You have the feeling that, even though your partner is next to you on the sofa, he has been missing you for a long time. has abandoned

My partner doesn’t stop playing video games: what if he suffers from an addiction?

When we talk about addictions it is common to think of substances such as drugs. However, The compulsive need to play video games is part of what is known as disorders due to addictive behaviors.. And this is increasingly common.

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What’s more, studies such as those carried out at the University of London tell us that, although it is true that until a long time ago not much attention was paid to it, we are facing a possible mental health disorder. Therefore, when someone points out to us that my partner doesn’t stop playing video games, We should assess whether or not that person may seem to have a real behavioral addiction problem.. How to know? These are some dimensions that we should attend to:

The person seems happier playing video games than doing any other activity.Has stopped socializing or doing other activities. Much of the time he has is dedicated to this entertainment.Neglect other responsibilities: housework, caring for your partner, children, pets, eating while playing…The time spent playing increases over time, Because the initial pattern of behavior becomes insufficient as tolerance grows. When he is asked to stop playing and spend time with his partner or doing other activities, he becomes angry or anxious. You feel inability to detach yourself from this form of technology.The person’s family and friends also complain of the excess time spent with video games.

Although not all disease manuals consider video game addiction as a pathology, some of the most recent editions do.

What can we do about this situation?

Lack of control over the game, absolute priority of this activity, neglect of other spheres of personal life… These are the main indicators of a video game addiction. Therefore, If our partner shows this reality, it is important to request psychological help.

This is not just a behavior that defines adolescents between 11 and 18 years old. Video game addictions also occur in the adult population and have a high impact on family and couple relationships. In these cases, approaches such as cognitive-behavioral therapy are the most suitable.

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On the other hand, if my partner won’t stop playing video games and is neglecting me, What I should do is talk to her and ask for changes. Reaching an agreement on playing times is essential. Fulfilling it, tending to the relationship and being able to lead a normal life in which dedicating hours to many more tasks outside of a screen is basic and elementary.

Thus, if these advances are not achieved and the person is not willing to show any improvement, we will assess the possibility or not of continuing that relationship. These are, without a doubt, situations that occur with high frequency and that we must take into account.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Burleigh, T.L., Griffiths, M.D., Sumich, A., Wang, G.J., & Kuss, D.J. (2020). Gaming disorder and internet addiction: A systematic review of resting-state EEG studies. Addictive Behaviors, 107, 106429. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.addbeh.2020.106429General Council of Psychology of Spain. (sf). The WHO has included “video game disorder” in ICD-11. InfocopOnline. https://www.infocop.es/view_article.asp?id=7241Coyne, SM, Stockdale, LA, Warburton, W., Gentile, DA, Yang, C., & Merrill, BM (2020). Pathological video game symptoms from adolescence to emerging adulthood: A 6-year longitudinal study of trajectories, predictors, and outcomes. Developmental Psychology, 56(7), 1385-1396. https://doi.org/10.1037/dev0000939De Muro, GE (2020). New Paradigms in Mental Health: Behavioral Addictions Mediated by New Technologies as Prevalence of Dual Pathology. Universidad Siglo 21 Repository. https://repositorio.uesiglo21.edu.ar/handle/ues21/18645Pontes, HM (2017). Making the Case for Video Game Addiction: Does It Exist or Not? Springer International Publishing eBooks, 41-57. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-95495-0_Stevens, M., Dorstyn, D., Delfabbro, P., & King, D.L. (2021). Global prevalence of gaming disorder: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Australian and New Zealand Journal of Psychiatry, 55(6), 553-568. https://doi.org/10.1177/0004867420962851

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