There are days when we can do everything and days when everything can do us

There are days when everything can overcome us and moments when nothing resists us.. Is there something wrong with it? Is it a problem to experience those ups and downs in mood, those swings in the universe of motivation? Of course not. People are not machines, infallible androids in everyday purposes. We are human beings with better days and less good moments.

Now, the point is that on average, We manage those times quite poorly when discouragement overcomes us and oxidizes performance. There are times when the mind says “Come on, try hard, you have things to do” and not only does the body not accompany, but there is a part of our brain that responds to “Sorry, today there are no reserves for enthusiasm, desire or motivation.”

This lack of energy is not always due to a health problem, discouragement has a relief and its own composition that when it sets in and traps us, it is very difficult to get rid of it. It is a complex mix of psychological processes and emotions. In it there are thoughts, physical sensations, worries and various types of emotions (apathy, sadness, frustration…).

Those “down” days are by no means a reflection that we are suffering from any disorder; It’s not depression. However, the most appropriate thing is to ensure that these states do not extend the time. Just as they come, they must leave, be passing visitors, the kind who leave us their message and later abandon us to make way for better times. Let’s dig a little deeper.

What happens to us on those days when everything can’t stop us?

It may seem curious, but experts in the psychology of motivation point out something striking: the ups and downs enrich us as human beings. Going through those times when one is capable of taking on the world and soon, the days arise when everything can do us, can give us the opportunity to teach ourselves several things. The first, that we are not infallible and that hitting rock bottom from time to time is normal.

On the other hand, Knowing why we fall apart and what is behind the discouragement allows us to know ourselves better. However, there is a problem and that is that we do not like those “downturns” and we defend ourselves against them like someone who gets rid of something uncomfortable that they prefer to keep away. We camouflage the discomfort without understanding it, without knowing how to manage those hidden realities that so often extinguish our desire to take on the world.

Thus, and almost without realizing it, these problems become entrenched and the brain enters a cycle of constant ups and downs in which it is very easy to lead to helplessness, to that camouflaged form of depression that is dysthymia. We must be careful.

The days when everything is possible for us should be very specific in time and not something recurring. These are moments when there is no other option other than the obvious one: talking to ourselves and promoting emotional self-care.

Why do I feel this way? What is behind the discouragement?

On days when everything weighs us down and life itself weighs us down excessively, what we feel is discouragement. And when this state catches us, we use a thousand strategies to evade it: we sleep, we walk, we watch series, we listen to music, we meet someone, we do sports… All of these strategies are a way of masking the discomfort. We hide it and we don’t solve it.

It is essential in all cases that we are able to connect with the origin and trigger of that state of mind. Average, After those days when everything surpasses us, there are usually the following realities:

Social comparison. According to work carried out at Harvard University by Dr. Tod Rogers, people tend to compare our performance, what we do, what we achieve or have with our closest environment. Doing so, focusing on what others have achieved and sometimes feeling at a disadvantage, feeds discouragement and something else: low self-esteem.Tendency to see the negative side of things. Although we do not realize it, sometimes we go through the world with the glasses of negativity, those that only glimpse the difficulties, the problems, the mistakes made and the uncertainties. It is an obvious form of suffering.Listening too much to the critical and perfectionist self. Many of us have a highly harmful and dangerous inner self. It is that which fuels an internal dialogue based on self-criticism, in the search for absolute perfectionism, that in which errors have no place.Neglected emotions and needs. Taking care of our emotions is an act of psychological hygiene. However, we are skilled experts in the opposite: in hiding what hurts, in disguising what frustrates, what angers, what disappoints. All these dimensions create scabs and suffering. Something that without a doubt we cannot leave for tomorrow.

What can I do on those days when everything is against us?

The days when everything is overwhelming cannot be avoided, they cannot be solved by going out to see a movie or binge eating. These are not appropriate behaviors. You don’t have to avoid it, you have to face it, accept those days of depression. and allow us to explain what is in them and what we must solve.

We will address our thoughts and concerns. It is not about replacing negative thoughts with positive ones either; that strategy doesn’t work. What we must do is give them presence and reason with them, understand if they are logical, if they have a basis and what I can do to alleviate those concerns.We will connect with our emotionswith those sensations that our body experiences: anger, sadness, fear… Practices such as relaxation or meditation can help us.Onboard plan. On those days when everything is against us, it is good to give ourselves time, relax, connect with ourselves in calm. Likewise, after deciphering what worries us and what is the reason why we are like this, it is appropriate to create a plan, some short-term goals. We will establish goals that motivate us and that are easy to achieve to increase the feeling of control, the ability to achieve and the enthusiasm.

To conclude, we all have the full right to have our good days and our not so good moments. We learn from everything and from each experience we must come out stronger. Let us therefore learn not to fear those days of discouragementare those inflections in the timeline that must be assumed, faced and understood. Let’s keep it in mind.

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