The importance of having a good relationship with yourself

Since we are little, we need the affection and company of others to feel integrated into a group and maintain our psychological well-being. Despite this, we live in a individualistic society, in which competition and material things are more important than our own needs.

Of all the relationships we find throughout our lives; friends, family, co-workers, partners and society itself, all are affected by a common denominator: us. Thus, just as it is important to know how to relate to others, it is also important to have a good relationship with yourself.

First it’s you

We are born without an instruction manual on how to live. However, the fact that for this it is important to have a good relationship with oneself, in addition to being aware of everything it implies, could be compared to the safety instructions on airplanes: ““Put on the oxygen mask before putting it on anyone else.”.

Think for a moment about the people you love and care about and reflect on how you act around them. Surely, sometimes, you carry out behaviors to make them feel comfortable or because you know that they care. Hence, it is very common to leave ourselves for last and not do those things for us.

However, although it is ignored and undervalued, There is always time to look into the eyes of our own being and connect with who we are, free of distractions.

Of course, we cannot forget that we live in a liquid society, as Bauman said, one in which the superficial and the ephemeral shape our lifestyle. The one in which social and digital interaction makes difficult the act of disconnecting due to the fear of getting lost and to discover everything that we are in essence.

A society that demands an egocentric self that reduces the ability to truly relate and in which the relationship with oneself is totally distorted.

Now, disconnecting from the digital, from the world of appearance and the superficial, is necessary and almost urgent. We must have our own space to clarify and simplify our world, although it is true that this takes time. For this reason, from time to time, we must stop along the way to think and check how we are doing, especially when our circumstances and needs change.

For example, When you are under too much stress you need to know how to relax and take a breath. To do this, it is advisable to have the following phrase recorded in our minds: “Today I am not there for anyone because today I need myself.”

Take care of your internal dialogue

One of the most important aspects that we have to take care of to have a good relationship with ourselves is the way we talk to each other, that is, our internal dialogue. The one that is influenced by what other people told us when we were little and that as we grow up shapes the relationship we have with ourselves.

Balance the scales

If when we were children we were encouraged to satisfy our personal needs and interests, without forgetting those of others, we will surely develop a healthy foundation for our own relationship. The one in which we are also relevant, we respect each other and take each other into account.

However, it is not usually the norm. There are many people who have not asked themselves how they are, how they are and where they are going, although it is never too late. Or there are also those others who only have reproaches and negative comments towards themselves. The important thing is to stop beating yourself up, accept yourself and give yourself healthy self-love. Cognitive behavioral therapy, meditation and daily reflection can help a lot with this.

How to develop a stronger relationship with yourself?

A healthy and balanced relationship with yourself It is the ability to value yourself healthily as a person and accept both your strengths and weaknesses.. The process to achieve this may be different for each person, but there are some common points to keep in mind. They are the following:

Self-confidence. Trust is very important. You have to be able to back yourself and believe in yourself, even if you end up making a mistake or wrong decision. Confidence is nourished by knowing that you will be able to learn from it, correct it and continue moving forward. It also means trusting your intuition and knowing that you have the answers within you.Love yourself. What does it really mean to love yourself? It’s about knowing your flaws and virtues, knowing who you are as a person (your fundamental values ​​and principles) and believing that you are capable because you are a being with the capacity to love, create and feel.Spend quality time with yourself. Knowing how you like others to treat you is a great guide. The time you take for self-reflection, to be alone, is key to beginning to change habits and behaviors that do not make you evolve as a person. To do this, set aside a few minutes a day to have a date with you.Prioritize self-care: adequate sleep, exercise, nutrition, hobbies, relaxation and rest that are not lacking.Be tested. Dare to grow, do and be better. Take a risk, be brave and take a step to do what you want so much and that fear limits.Click the restart or shutdown button. Disconnecting from social networks and turning off the mental noise of our daily lives have many psychological benefits. Meditation or a walk in nature are other alternatives.Have fun in the process. Self-discovery is a daily process that lasts a lifetime. Enjoying this process of introspection will help you move forward in your growth. Of course, with respect and being aware that not everything will be a bed of roses…

Having a good relationship with yourself is a lifelong journey. If you feel unconditional love for your family or loved ones, you also have to experience it for yourself. Do you dare to look inside to discover yourself and determine who you are?

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