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The difference between being self-centered, selfish and self-conscious

Selfish coworkers, self-centered friends, and self-conscious people… What’s the difference between these types of behaviors? Which would be healthier for ourselves and others? We analyze it.

Recent studies warn us that people are becoming increasingly selfish. Now what does this really mean? What implication could it have for the future? In fact, before addressing this possibility, it is important to understand the difference between being self-centered, selfish, and self-conscious. There are three very particular dimensions that should be discovered.

Pío Baroja said with his usual wit that when a person looks at himself a lot he doesn’t have a face, he has a mask.. It is true, in some way, we are all aware that on a daily basis there are many who walk through the world with a mask on, perhaps trying to demonstrate a particular sense of self-sufficiency or detachment.

In addition, We could also say that between selfishness and egocentrism there is often a certain attempt at survival, often poorly carried out. It is that in which one, for whatever reasons, chooses at a given moment to turn one’s face towards oneself and prioritize oneself in each moment and circumstance. However, “because I am worth it or deserve it” It very often goes beyond the rights and needs of others.

We are undoubtedly facing a topic that is worth delving into.

What is the difference between being self-centered, selfish and self-conscious?

It has happened to all of us at some point. Suddenly, you demand something for yourself or make your needs clear and that person in front of you scolds you with “It is clear that you are becoming more and more selfish”. This term, selfishness, falls on us in such common circumstances as, for example, when we stop dedicating time to tasks that cause us more stress than satisfaction.

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In the eyes of others, we are, in many situations, selfish or self-centered, thereby distorting the true meaning and implication of these terms. It is interesting, therefore, to understand and manage this set of everyday dimensions much better.. We analyze them.

The egocentric personality: I am the center of the world

Ambition, exhibitionism, arrogance… The difference between being egocentric, selfish and self-conscious almost always starts from the root of self-esteem.. For Erich Fromm, the egocentric personality tries to hide insecurity and low self-esteem by trying to gain control over the attention of others. The goal is to prevent others from exploring your weaknesses.

They are ambitious figures, with great fantasies of power and success, with little empathy. and very sensitive to the evaluations of others. Thus, while the selfish person seeks above all to put his needs before those of others, the egocentric only longs to be the center of attention and make those looks the mechanism to feed his identity and his low self-esteem.

Thus, studies such as those carried out at the University of Pisa (Palermo), for example, show us that there is a way to reduce the egocentric approach. Self-awareness, that is, becoming aware of oneself in relation to others, reduces this obsessive need for other people’s attention..

The selfish person: the world is for me

The difference between being egocentric, selfish and self-conscious is that only this last dimension is, in fact, the healthiest. However, as we well know, we live in a society in which selfishness abounds. It is that behavior in which one is always ahead of anyone. Only your own needs matter. On the scale of priorities “ME” reigns, then me and finally me too.

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In this way, research works such as those carried out at the University of Waterloo (Canada) warn us of something. We are becoming an increasingly selfish society. Individualism, self-sufficiency and the inability to cooperate together to solve local and global problems seem to be strongly established.

The difference between being egocentric, selfish and self-conscious: the world belongs to everyone

The world belongs to everyone. We are relevant and exceptional figures living with other equally transcendent people.. We are a self in conjunction with other selves. One way to assume this perspective is, as we have pointed out before, through the development of self-awareness.

Now, what does this dimension consist of?

Self-awareness involves keeping your own needs and desires in mind, attending to them, and in turn, always taking those of others into consideration.It implies respect for oneself and others. The difference between being egocentric, selfish and self-aware means that this last aptitude enables us to have empathy and an authentic sense of coexistence.The most decisive thing in this psychological construct is to balance between the spheres of others and one’s own.. In fact, this is perhaps the most complex element in which we must learn to navigate on a daily basis. Sometimes, when we claim the need to attend to our own needs, we are labeled selfish when in reality, all we do is practice self-care.

Therefore, it is always appropriate that we learn to confront the selfish label. Self-awareness should allow us to take into account that often, what we want does not have to compete with what the other wants.

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Selfishness falls by itself the moment we learn to cooperate and reach agreements. To do this, only two dimensions are needed: understanding and respect.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Golubickis, M., Tan, L.B.G., Falben, J.K., & Macrae, C.N. (2016). The observing self: Diminishing egocentrism through brief mindfulness meditation. European Journal of Social Psychology, 46(4), 521–527. https://doi.org/10.1002/ejsp.2186Santos, HC, Varnum, MEW, & Grossmann, I. (2017). Global increases in individualism. Psychological Science (published online, July 13, 2017). Scaffidi Abbate, C., Boca, S., & Gendolla, GHE (2016). Self-awareness, perspective-taking, and egocentrism. Self and Identity, 15(4), 371–380. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298868.2015.1134638

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