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The 12 best phrases of Anthony de Mello

Anthony de Mello’s phrases are endowed with universality. For this reason, they have become transcendent statements throughout the world.

The phrases of Anthony de Mello reveal to us an ecumenical thinker, who He had great clarity in capturing essential aspects of spirituality contemporary. He himself was a synthesis of various cultures and beliefs.

He was born in Bombay (India), but unlike of the majority of his compatriots, he was Catholic. In fact, he became a priest, in the Jesuit order. He then went to live in the United States, where he became famous thanks to his preaching and books.

Perfect love is molded out of fear. Where there is love, there are no demands, there are no expectations, there is no dependency. I don’t demand that you make me happy; my unhappiness does not reside in you. If you left me, I wouldn’t feel sorry for myself; I greatly enjoy your company, but I don’t cling to it.”.

-Anthony de Mello-

Many of Anthony de Mello’s phrases cannot be framed in a belief specific. He took elements of Eastern religions and mixed them with a Catholic and social message. Although his way of thinking was controversial for some, the truth is that millions of people in the world have benefited from his teachings. These are some of his most remembered phrases.

1. One of Anthony de Mello’s most remembered phrases

This is, without a doubt, one of Anthony de Mello’s most quoted and remembered phrases: “The happiness It cannot depend on events. It is your reaction to events that makes you suffer”.

As we see, there is a strong influence of Eastern philosophies in this statement. It reminds us that realities are not the origin of happiness or suffering. This depends only on the internal world. Therefore, what is essential is the response to events not the events themselves.

2. Others are a mirror

Another of Anthony de Mello’s phrases says the following: “You see the people and things not as they are, but as you are”. In it, it is once again reiterated that everything depends on each person’s way of perception, on how they construct their world.

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That phrase reminds us of something that psychoanalysis also talks about: projection mechanism. It is our gaze that shapes what we see.

3. This is enlightenment

Enlightenment is one of the concepts that is repeated over and over again in the phrases of Anthony de Mello. It gives it a meaning similar to that of Buddhism. It is an awakening of deep consciousness that allows you to come into contact with reality in a more genuine way.

In this regard, Tony de Mello says: “Enlightenment is: absolute cooperation with the inevitable”. It is a beautiful way of expressing that lucidity comes from accepting things as they are. In fact, you have to not only accept it, but “cooperate” with it. That is, let it be and join its dynamic.

4. Contact with nature

The following sentence is a reflection on current life in cities. In it, Anthony de Mello points out: “When you are too far from nature, your spirit dries up and dies, because it has been violently separated from its roots.”.

It is very interesting because one of the main sources of stress in cities is precisely this lack of contact with nature. Hence Many contemporary therapies are aimed at coming into contact with other living beings to heal..

5. Contemporary drugs

This is one of Anthony de Mello’s phrases that portrays several contemporary evils. He says the following: “Approval, success, praise, appreciation, are the drugs with which society has made us addicted, and by not always having them, the suffering is terrible.”.

The lucidity of that statement is surprising. Let us remember that Anthony de Mello died in 1987, meaning that he did not witness the massification of new technologies. However, in the previous sentence he already foresaw the new style of human relations. It also warns about these new forms of dependency, which only lead to suffering..

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6. The importance of change

“He who wants to be constant in happiness must change frequently.” He tells us about Mello.

This phrase invites us to change, transformation and evolution on the spiritual plane to achieve our happiness and fully realize ourselves.

7. Live in the present

One of the greatest sources of unhappiness in the contemporary world is worry about the future and focusing on unfulfilled desires. In this regard Anthony de Mello says “There is not a single moment in your life when you do not have everything you need to be happy. The reason you are unhappy is because you keep thinking about what you don’t have, instead of thinking more about what you have right now.”

With this phrase he shows us the importance of stopping looking for happiness in what we lack and concentrating and being grateful for those little things that we can enjoy every day.

8. Love as a transformative power

On the other hand, in Anthony de Mello’s thoughts there is also room for a fundamental theme for our happiness: love. “There is only one need: that need is to love. When someone discovers that, he is transformed.”

Have you wondered about the power of love in your transformation and that of all the people around you?

9. Freedom and autonomy

“Selfishness is demanding that the other do what you want. Letting everyone do what they want is love. “In love there can be no demands or blackmail.” This phrase makes us reflect on the importance of keeping freedom and autonomy in mind in all our relationships with others.

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No one should impose their wishes on the will of others, this is a basic principle of love and respect.

10. Self-knowledge

Another phrase by Anthony de Mello with a deep meaning for our lives is: “The most important question in the world, the basis of every mature act, is: Who am I? Because, without knowing yourself, you cannot even know God. Knowing yourself is essential.”

Self-knowledge is vital to identify our light and shadow sides, consciously improve every day and know exactly where we want to go in the future.

11. The need to question the world we live in

Of course, in Anthony de Mello’s thoughts there are reflections on the importance of becoming aware of all the things that are affecting our planet. “These things will destroy the human race: politics without principles, progress without compassion, wealth without work, learning without silence, religion without recklessness, and worship without conscience.”

Recognizing that from our daily lives we can take small actions to transform the world can lead us to a collective fight to care for and preserve our common home.

12. Ignorance and wisdom

Finally, a phrase to remember every day: “When you see that you are not as wise today as you thought yesterday, you are wiser today.”

Recognizing everything we ignore or all the mistakes we make is the only way to progressively achieve wisdom.

Anthony de Mello is much more than the author of several best seller. The clarity and kindness with which he taught his teachings made him one of the great guides of today’s world. He was inspired by a deep faith in love as the source of everything and the conviction that through words the world can also be changed.

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