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Surround yourself with people who are happy about your successes and happiness.

There are people who do not hesitate to support you when things go wrong. However, when you achieve success and are happy, they seem to become cold and distant. For what is this?

Surround yourself with people who are happy about your successes and happiness, with friends, colleagues and family who truly feel your joy. Because in the world of relationships and social ties there are many who wear masks. Figures that do not always see with good eyes that things are going well for you, that you climb positions and go, granite by granite, giving shape to your dreams.

We see this frequently in work environments.. Suddenly, someone begins to stand out, they are praised and achieve a promotion on their own merits. Others do not hesitate to congratulate that person. However, there are many who perceive a clear threat in the triumph of others. What they experience is an instinctive reaction motivated by a hidden and silent envy.

In some way, we have more than assumed these work dynamics: they are part of the evident social competitiveness. However, The real problem comes when someone we care about seems to react negatively to our successes.. What is happening? What is the reason for this coldness or such an impostered reaction?

“Oh envy, root of infinite evils and worm of virtues!”

-Miguel de Cervantes-

Surround yourself with people who are happy about your successes and happiness and your life will improve

Have you seen someone succeed and felt immense joy for him or her? Most likely, yes. We often feel it at sporting events when we see athletes achieve exceptional milestones in their disciplines. Also when our favorite actor or actress receives an award in that series or movie that we liked so much. However, do you feel the same when a friend of yours succeeds at something?

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If the answer is yes, congratulations! You demonstrate clear human quality and authentic feelings for that close figure. Thus, and since you demonstrate it for others, you expect the same from yours. However, when it comes to social relationships, a curious fact occurs… If there is something we want, it is for our loved ones to be that close support when things go wrong for us.

We forget that it is just as important that they are in the bad times as in the good times. In fact, authentic friendships are also enhanced when they feel proud of us for our achievements. We need at our side figures free of envy and rich in mudita, a term that in Sanskrit translates as empathetic joy.

The silent envy present in many of our relationships

Envy is born from social comparison. It is a very basic type of emotion that we all experience much more than we think. It is almost inevitable to feel a sting inside when we see someone achieve something we long for. However, as happens in any emotional experience, this reality serves a purpose.

It is none other than motivating ourselves to work on what others achieve and that we also long to achieve. However, There are also those who make envy their way of life. Far from using it to react, they castle in it, hating others for who they are, what they have and have achieved.

Thus, according to a study, Permanent envy leads to a worsening of mental health. All of this is understandable and we may have even seen it in someone at some point.

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Now, if we suggest that “surround yourself with people who are happy about your successes and happiness” it is for a specific reason. Perceiving a sudden distance from a friend when you achieve a triumph hurts and contradicts. Noticing how certain people who you thought were significant do not respond as you expected when things are going well for you creates a void. Also feelings of disappointment.

That silent envy that is suddenly revealed among our friends in the face of our own triumphs generates pain in us. Perceiving how someone walks away when things are going well for us can even make what we have achieved less satisfactory.

Empathic joy (mudita) key to authentic relationships

Surround yourself with people who are happy about your successes, with friends who enjoy your achievements.. Have figures nearby who are proud of you for who you are and what you achieve in life. Those and not others are the ones who truly deserve your affection and affection. Because, although it is true that we all need the support of others when things go wrong, it is in conquests that the true friend is also discovered.

These men or women will show you what is known as empathetic or supportive joy.. It is an emotional state in which one feels genuinely happy about the success of others. This cannot be faked, authenticity is perceived, palpable in the other and that joy in our friends, colleagues or family intensifies our own achievement even more.

Because when something is shared with the people we love most, everything is experienced more intensely.

Surround yourself with people who are happy about your successes and be happy about the triumphs of others.

Sometimes, we preserve certain figures like someone guarding a sacred cow. They are not of much use to us, but we keep them in mind because they are childhood friends, because they have always been there… However, they do not bring us any joy, quite the opposite. Until finally that day arrives when we clearly perceive the envy, the coldness, the fake smile, the false joy…

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Surround yourself with people who are happy about your successes and distance yourself from those who are not, as they say, in good times or in bad times. Also, do not neglect another essential aspect.

Also be able to celebrate the triumphs of others, demonstrates that empathetic and supportive joy for those who conquer their dreams. Because that genuine happiness also benefits you: it makes you a better person.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Cohen-Charash, Yochi & Larson, Elliott. (2016). An Emotion Divided: Studying Envy Is Better Than Studying “Benign” and “Malicious” Envy. Current Directions in Psychological Science. 26. 10.1177/0963721416683667.Foster, GM, Apthorpe, RJ, Bernard, HR, Bock, B., Brogger, J., Brown, Whiting, BB (1972). The Anatomy of Envy: A Study in Symbolic Behavior. Current Anthropology, 13(2), 165–202. http://www.jstor.org/stable/2740970Mujcic R, Oswald AJ. Is envy harmful to a society’s psychological health and well-being? A longitudinal study of 18,000 adults. Soc Sci Med. 2018 Feb;198:103-111. doi: 10.1016/j.socscimed.2017.12.030. Epub 2017 Dec 27. PMID: 29316510.

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