If you have to force it, it’s not your size (rings, shoes, relationships…)

If you have to force it, it’s not your size. This statement is valid for any element that in some way has to fit with us, whether it is clothing or relationships, friendships, etc.

Many will identify with that situation in which we see a garment that we love, we ask and they tell us that our size is out of stock. Then we order a larger or smaller size, to see if there is any luck. Many times we insist on making something fit us and we don’t realize that it is actually hurting us.

What causes this is the lack of love. But not just any kind of love, but specifically self-love. It is a true triumph to dare to put aside our hopes and open our eyes to realize that good feelings are never accompanied by submission.

If it is not your size, do not force it, love is not begging

Love is not begged or begged. If they don’t love us, insisting that they do so is guaranteed emotional suicide. We cannot wait for a miracle to happen and love to emerge. Much less can we maintain those expectations at the cost of our emotional health and our freedom.

The education we receive is largely to blame for this.. Thus, for example, we are tired of movies that promote dependency and that attribute to any relationship the ability to overcome any type of obstacle.

This is not like this, a relationship that squeezes and hurts is preventing us from growing and oppressing our ability to breathe freely. It’s almost as simple as if we are drowning, we should get out of the water. Now, getting out of a tortuous relationship is usually not easy and, above all, it is very scary…

Heal the wounds that have been generated by forcing the relationship

There is a very beautiful reality in relation to pearls that helps us illustrate how we can heal. the wounds that have arisen from a love relationship or forced friendship. Let’s see it…

In this sense, the first thing we must know is that An oyster that has not been injured in some way does not produce pearls., because the pearl is a healed wound. Pearls are products of pain, the results of a foreign or undesirable substance entering the interior of the oyster, such as a parasite or a grain of sand.

A lustrous substance called nacre is found in the inner part of the oyster. When a grain of sand penetrates it, the nacre cells begin to work and they cover it with layers and more layers, to protect the oyster’s defenseless body. As a result, a nice pearl is formed.

When you hit rock bottom

All these negative sensations are normal in situations of emotional adversity.

However, That same “weakness” that scares us so much can be used to strengthen us.. To illustrate this we are going to use the technique called Kintsugi that the Japanese use to repair broken pieces. This consists of reassembling the pieces of broken ceramic pieces with gold, in such a way that what was once broken, now becomes the most beautiful and strongest part.

If we use eastern wisdom to understand this, we understand that What has made us suffer also gives us value. What’s more, the beauty of our brokenness will depend on what we deepen inside ourselves and how we work through our pain.

Considering this, It is good that we strive to embroider with gold the tears in our garments.that we accept the need to close circles, say goodbye and not complicate our lives by trying over and over again to fit into a dress that does not fit us.

Trying to remake a book with a story that has already shown itself to have no future on other occasions, insisting on a size that is not ours, is deceiving ourselves. That’s why We must be aware that a wound cannot be healed if we are constantly dealing with it.

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