“Provoke situations where one misses the other”

There are moments in the relationship when we want to take a vacation from the partner. This will has nothing to do with separation, with being bad in marriage. None of that. It’s simply wanting to be alone for a while, doing what you want, when you want. Even if the husband goes away and you don’t, it’s already a profit. Alone at home, you’ll throw yourself into bed, watch TV as late as you like, refrain from shaving your crotch, wear an old T-shirt, eat in bed, turn on the light and read… Oh, how delicious!

There are still those vacations just for the couple. Important and necessary, because they make it possible to meet without the stress of everyday life, without children, without bills to pay. On a trip off, you trade problems. The discussion, this time, revolves around the train: at 10 am or at 2 pm? Or, with the wisdom of those who understand that just the two of them, alone, it won’t happen, it’s worth inviting a couple of friends to cheer up, change the subject and distract. And even badmouthing your husband to the friend of the other couple. But it has to be that guy who badmouths her husband too! Yes, because friends who only speak well and still swear that they have sex every day and that the two always enjoy together are very annoying. You stand there listening to those lies all with a face and there’s no change. (And if one of them is really happy with her husband all the time and still has fun together all the time, which is rare but possible, it’s best not to call, lest she get depressed.)

Another option is on group trips, with several excited couples. Women get together to speak ill of marriage in general, of the bossy boss or that insubordinate manager, of children, of schools, etc. They get together and talk about the hotties, the latest technological discoveries, tell some business advantages and so on. At night, when you meet the respective person in the room, you have everyone’s business to talk about. But the best thing about these group shows is finding out that everyone really likes him, invites him to every show, and starts talking so highly about him that you find him interesting again. It’s that feeling: “Guys, the world believes my husband is amazing”. This guarantees at least a week of happiness and real dating. The effect is even better than those exercises where you have to make an effort to look at your partner with the same charm as the first few times.

But, going back to the beginning of the text, I still think it is essential to seek small breaks from the other throughout the year – each with its own individuality. Encourage that beer with his friends every week and, on your side, book a trip with your friends. Create situations where you both miss each other. Afterwards, both will have something to tell. Take the opportunity to do what he doesn’t like. My boyfriend likes to hunt; I have horror. So I give all my blessings for him to go, he doesn’t even have to invite me. I just hope he actually hunts something down and comes back in a good mood. It’s not easy, it provokes jealousy: how can he be having fun without me? But smart couples take vacations from each other naturally, any time. And this maturity serves to confirm love. Or to attest that things are really bad – especially if you keep praying that his trip with friends doesn’t end so soon.