Passive communication, do you practice it?

Statistics tell us that many people practice passive communication.. We may even carry it out ourselves, although we have never defined it that way. The truth is that we are talking about a communication style that is quite harmful for us and those around us. It has a negative impact on our self-esteem and prevents us from relating in a healthy and appropriate way with others.

As the article points out Empathy, assertive communication and following rules. A program to develop life skills Passive communication characterizes those people who do not defend their rights, who maintain a distant posture and who bow to the demands of others, ignoring their own needs.

Passive communication and fear of confrontation

Some studies indicate that passive communication can be motivated by the need to please others.. This is true, but there are also other reasons, such as lack of social skills or fear of conflict.

People who are habitual of this type of communication may also be so because they have been subjected to constant censorship in their education. So, Although the censor or the power of the censor is no longer there, his imprint is still present. These people, having not practiced expressing their opinions or needs, feel insecure in this sense.

On the other hand, if they have received very strong criticism, they may continue to be subject to the tyranny of their echo. So, They continue to be prey to an insecurity that was inoculated into them many years ago.

What they may experience in those moments is a feeling of helplessness. “Why don’t the words come out and I hesitate? “Why does our mind seem to paralyze, preventing us from thinking fluently?” The reason is that there is a disproportionate fear of confrontation, criticism, and judgment.

Examples of passive communication

Perhaps everything we have discussed so far has seemed very familiar to us. However, let’s see some clear examples of what passive communication is and how it manifests itself in everyday life.

We go to a restaurant and ask the waiter to please make our steak very well done. When he brings it to us, it’s not the way we wanted it to be, but we don’t say anything. The moment the waiter asks us how the food is We answer “very good”, even though it is not true..Our friends are planning to do something for the weekend and are deciding where to go. Our position is to wait for someone to propose something and say “I think it’s great to go to that place.” The same goes for the day or time. We are unable to propose, we hope that others do it first.A friend asks us if we can leave him notes for a subject. He always does the same thing and never bothers to take notes in class, but rather spends his time talking with other classmates or drawing pictures in his notebooks. Despite this, we find ourselves unable to say “no”.

In this sense, let’s imagine that we want to study a certain career because we like it, but one of our parents tells us “no” and also makes us feel bad for not sharing their wishes. So, If you end up changing your mind, in many cases it won’t matter because we will have already agreed to your initial wish. and we feel the need to please him. After all, she is one of the people who has given us the most opportunities.

This can occur in different circumstances like wanting to go to another country to study another language, go to a birthday party or stay overnight at a friend’s house. If we have been manipulated and the fact of being able to defend our rights has been taken away from us, in adulthood we will act with a passive communication style with others.

Beneath this scenario usually hides a total lack of self-esteem.. She is so damaged and mistreated that we are incapable of even visualizing that we have more decision-making power than we think and more rights than we assert.

If we identify this circumstance and we do not see a way to achieve a change, the next step is to request Professional Help to give us the tools needed to be able to get out of passive communication and start being assertive. This will not happen overnight, but we will see progress that will encourage us to move forward.

You might be interested…