I feel old: the eclipse of youth in women

It’s no secret that our society puts a lot of pressure on women to never grow old.. I feel old, many voices say, between confusion and sadness. Why must it be like this? Why associate only negative ideas with the passage of time? Don’t the years also bring with them other pleasures that youth does not enjoy?

It seems that youth only has positive aspects and old age It was little more than just a place of losses. Nothing more wrong. Neither youth is so wonderful and free of problems, nor is the passage of years synonymous with decadence. There is a lot of reality data that proves it.

I feel old is an expression which is worth delving into. Mainly because it is a statement that is most often heard from women in middle age. That is, they have not properly entered the stage of old age. That is what we will do next: analyze a little what is behind that expression.

I feel old… for what?

Implicitly, the expression I feel old is associated with some specific events. In many cases, It is an indirect way to talk about changes physical conditions that are experienced over the years. Tacitly, they may associate this with their relationship life.. Additionally, talk about an uncertainty about the place that the person occupies within society.

There is a whole cultural imaginary around what a woman is, or n gender that has been sexualized to an extreme degree. The woman must be pretty, healthy, pleasant and, of course, also young. The one who is not so pretty, the one who is not so healthy or so pleasant, or not young, would seem to not fit the scheme of the feminine. Therefore, the expression I feel old is also a way of declaring that it is no longer well understood how to exercise femininity.

In order not to go too far, we have to see what type of women our society calls “models”. ”. The parameters that define them are so rigid that very few fit into them. And by naming them as “models” we are implicitly pointing out that they correspond to the most perfect or finished expression of what it means to be a woman. Of course, a woman over forty or fifty rarely fits the parameters of models. Seeing these girls, it is natural that many of them say: I feel old.

Youth and old age, do we see ourselves through the male gaze?

Young women also experience endless pressures. Youth in a woman generates greater acceptance both in men and in society as a whole. Even so, other types of mandates appear. Being pretty, for example. Or be thin, or have a boyfriend, or have children. Be elegant. But the pretty, thin and elegant ones also suffer the pressure of gazes, not always benevolent towards them.

If we look closely, this way of seeing young women and older women is strongly influenced by machismo, which still survives in many parts of the world.. Many times men are allowed to validate women and decide which characteristics are favorable to them and which are not. Of course, not all men are transmitters of these commands, but, unfortunately, many are.

Therein lies the difficulty. Be it men, or whoever it may be, the truth is that no one should determine how much we are worth. or how right is what we are or do. Nobody has the right to it and we don’t have to grant it to them.

Age, a not very relevant variable

Beyond any consideration, we are people, before anything else. And all ages of the person bring with them wonderful contributions and also limitations. in one sense or another. The best age is always the one in which we find ourselves and balance. And in fact, this is easier to do at older ages.

If a woman says: I feel old, it would be advisable to identify what makes her feel that way.. Perhaps you frequent environments in which a “commercial” vision of women prevails. Or it is also possible that her circle of friends is more critical than necessary. It is possible that by looking for other, more liberating environments and friendships, you will find that she may be living one of the most wonderful stages of her life.

Perhaps we women spend too much time in our lives focusing on the needs and expectations of others. Middle age and old age are a more than favorable stage for us to think. To take care of ourselves, pamper ourselves, spread our wings, and instead of saying I feel oldshout enthusiastically I feel alive.

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