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How to say goodbye to someone?

People often avoid goodbyes because it is more comfortable for them. However, adopting this habit can be really dangerous for our emotional health and that of others.

Saying goodbye to a person can be a difficult experience for several reasons, and there are even those who prefer to avoid it. The problem is that goodbyes are necessary to close cycles or episodes of our lives.

Unfinished business can leave emotional traces that continue to affect us regardless of how much time passes. For that reason, understanding how to say goodbye to someone is necessary to end and overcome important situations.

Luckily, this is a skill that can be learned through practice. In this article we will provide some ideas that will help you say goodbye in a healthy way. Although it is not easy, it will always be beneficial for your emotional health.

The importance of knowing how to say goodbye to someone

Family, friendly or romantic relationships can end at some point for various reasons. Depending on how close the bond is, this breakup could affect us in several ways. Breaking ties with a person is an event that begins a grieving process for the loss of an emotional connection.

In these types of cases the same thing happens as when a loved one dies. In this sense, It has been shown that when grief is not processed in a healthy way, it can lead to other alterations. For example, the patient may experience an anxiety crisis or depressive episodes. In this way, learning how to say goodbye to someone is necessary to close these experiences.

Schwörer, Krott and Oettingen (2020) published a study on the consequences of not saying goodbye appropriately. The results showed that saying goodbye in a healthy way reduced negative emotions, regret, and made it easier to accept change. Therefore, it can be said that goodbyes are necessary.

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However, for some people, the idea of ​​saying goodbye to another is complicated, and generates rejection. Saying goodbye is associated with unpleasant emotions, such as sadness or anger. But postponing the farewell indefinitely prevents these feelings from being processed and continuing to affect even after losing the relationship.

Next, we will show you how to say goodbye to someone through specific recommendations. In this way, you will be able to close the necessary cycles with the aim of moving forward and living new experiences.

Tips for saying goodbye to someone

All this theory is very good, but how to put it into practice? The truth is that it is not easy nor can it be done without prior reflection. Let’s see some tips that will help you with this.

1. Don’t act on impulse

Ending a relationship with someone is something we should think about carefully. It is not a good idea to do this when we are feeling certain emotions, such as anger or sadness. disappointment. It is important to evaluate whether ending that relationship is best for us. If after reflecting on it, you conclude that the relationship only causes you pain and there is no way to fix it, perhaps it is time to say goodbye.

2. Find the right time and place

For a farewell to happen in the most peaceful and healthy way, It is necessary to choose the right time and place. It is essential to have time to talk calmly and do so in a place where there are no interruptions or at least these are minimal. It is not appropriate to have these types of conversations if we are very busy or in crowded places where there is no privacy.

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3. Be honest and assertive

Another fundamental aspect of how to say goodbye to someone has to do with honesty. With this, We not only talk about being sincere when speaking with others, but also with ourselves.. It is advisable to take the time to reflect on what we feel about the situation. This way, we will know what we need to say to the other person to end the relationship.

On the other hand, assertiveness allows us to express ourselves with respect, both towards ourselves and towards others. It is possible to communicate a message clearly, without having to turn it into an insult or attack. Doing the latter can generate reactions from the other person that could lead to an argument. In turn, that would give rise to other feelings and processes that would make it more difficult to overcome grief.

4. Accept your emotions, even the unpleasant ones

Saying goodbye to someone can feel liberating at first. Although, some time later, other emotions such as anger, sadness or disgust are likely to arise, which are part of grieving. These types of feelings, even though they are not pleasant, need their space.

Do not try to repress your emotions or ignore them because this can lead to other complications.. Problems managing anger, depressive symptoms or anxiety attacks are related to unprocessed conflicts.

5. It takes time

Grief requires time and space to be able to overcome it in the best way. Don’t try to act like things changed overnight or that everything is perfect. Although it could have been the best decision, it is still not easy to adapt to the new reality. Try to give yourself the time you need to accept the changes and go at your own pace.

6. Go to therapy if you need it

Goodbyes can be complex. For example, when it is not possible to say goodbye to a person because he is not physically present. In those cases, A psychologist or psychotherapist can use different techniques to allow you to get closure.. In addition, it is also useful to learn strategies to help manage the emotional pain of saying goodbye.

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To conclude, it can be stated that knowing how to say goodbye to someone is a key factor for mental health. Life is full of moments in which it is necessary to let go and say goodbye, denying this reality only generates suffering. On the other hand, accepting it as something natural and doing it appropriately contributes to personal development.

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All cited sources were reviewed in depth by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, validity and validity. The bibliography in this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

Schwörer, B., Krott, N.R., & Oettingen, G. (2020). Saying goodbye and saying it well: Consequences of a (not) well-rounded ending. Motivation Science, 6(1), 21.González, LG, & Kasparane, AG (2009). Assertiveness: a theoretical-empirical analysis. Teaching and research in psychology, 14(2), 403-425.Díaz, T., & Turrent, M. (2015). Should I stay or go?: Reflections for deciding to continue or end a relationship. Grijalbo.Zeelenberg, M., van der Pligt, J., & de Vries, NK (2000). Attributions of responsibility and affective reactions to decision outcomes. Acta Psychologica, 104(3), 303-315.Millán-González, R., & Solano-Medina, N. (2010). Grief, pathological grief and interpersonal therapy. Colombian Journal of Psychiatry, 39(2), 375-388.

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