How to recognize that you are in a manipulative relationship

We can find ourselves immersed in a manipulative relationship and sometimes, not even realize it. On the contrary, it can also happen that we are aware of it but we do not dare to take the step to leave it. Or even, there may be situations in which we put blindfolds on our eyes and from time to time, we doubt whether we are in a relationship of this type.

Manipulative relationships, whether in the family, partner or between friends, usually cause negative feelings such as guilt and sadness. As well as a weakening of our personality, plunging us into a situation of non-validation and incapacity. A manipulative person will make you feel guilty for what you do, even if there is nothing wrong with it.

Do you think you are involved in a manipulative relationship but you are not sure? Would you like to know how to detect if your relationship has some aspects of manipulation? Here are some keys that will help you know.

That person “does everything for you”… and always reminds you of it.

There are people who really put all their effort into helping you, but others just say it. You can identify manipulators because they remind you of every small act whenever they can. . Furthermore, they will make you feel that you have an obligation to thank them and if you don’t, you are the bad guy in the story and you don’t love them as much as they love you. For them nothing is ever enough.

Forget about receiving something from these people without feeling obligated or guilty, or any other negative feeling. They tend to be experts at making you feel bad. Manipulative people love to have power and will seek it through any means.

They exploit their insecurities

Manipulators will take advantage of your insecurities to control you. Sometimes these insecurities don’t even really exist, but they convince you that they are there to make you feel sorry. Some of the phrases you will hear are:

“My previous partners have cheated on me so many times that now I prefer that you not have friends of the opposite sex. You understand me?“, “I’ve had such a bad time before that anything you do related to it causes me great suffering.“…

The problem with a manipulative relationship is that little by little they distance you from who you really are. and their insecurities control and limit you, most of the time without you realizing it all. So you will gradually isolate yourself from both others and yourself.

They make you doubt yourself

The best way to recognize that you are in a manipulative relationship It’s being honest about how you feel. Have you reached the point where you don’t believe in yourself? Do you need recognition from that person to feel like you are doing the right thing? Does any negative comment they make to you diminish (even more) your self-confidence?

Manipulative people will do everything possible to make you distrust yourself. . In this way they manage to take control over what you do and think. This way they can guide you to make the decisions they expect. The ideal for them is that you always seek their opinion and to achieve this they sabotage your security.

They make you responsible for their emotions

Manipulators are very ironic in their behavior. On the one hand, they make you feel that you are responsible for what they feel . On the other hand, they seek to convince you that they are right when it comes to your very personal decisions.

With these people you will feel strange and in a chaotic world. If they feel sad they will say it’s because you did something that made them that way. If they are angry, they will make you review your behavior to find out what you did or said. The manipulative relationship is very exhausting because it makes you feel like you have no control over your life. and that you are responsible for everything negative. They become an emotional burden.

You think you want what they want

All relationships involve change and it is natural that at some point we take some ideas or feelings from the other person and adopt them. But If you start making decisions that don’t really make you happy just to please someone else, there is a problem.

Some people grow up in families where parents are very controlling and they don’t realize it because it is normal for them. And without meaning to, they may continue to maintain the same role in their relationships. If you think this is your situation, you should ask yourself:

Am I doing what I really want?If you had the option to do anything without any restrictions, what would you do?Am I happy or do I think there could be something better?

These are very complicated questions that will help you discover if you are in a manipulative relationship. Because if you don’t really do what you want, you end up not being who you are and that, in every sense, distances you from yourself.

Never do something that makes you unhappy

If you are in a manipulative relationship, it is very likely that you will be unhappy. Get out of there as soon as possible . Not doing so will lead you to feel worse and at some point you will have completely lost yourself. In case you already feel lost, go out now and find yourself. It won’t be easy but it will be very rewarding.

As we have seen, there are many signs that indicate that we may find ourselves immersed in a manipulative relationship. So if you detect that your relationship is of this type, try to get out of it as soon as possible for your emotional well-being.

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