Home » Romance Advice » How to make a man come back and reconsider, even if you think there is no solution –

How to make a man come back and reconsider, even if you think there is no solution –

Breakups are always difficult times for any couple. Memories of good times, sadness over separation, and uncertainty about the future cause us pain.

What if I told you that it is possible to return? If your relationship is worth it and you think you’re really right for each other, it’s worth a try! Here we present several simple tips so that you can regain his affection and that he returns to you to move forward as a couple.

Also read our guide on how to be happy after a breakup: 6 ways to achieve it

1. Accept the situation

Even if you feel bad because of the pain, take your time to analyze the situation from a place of understanding. Focus on what happened: he left you, and if he left you it was for a reason.

Reason about the reasons that led you to break up: Who left who? Was it by mutual agreement? Did he cheat on you? Did you generally argue over any triviality? These and other questions that arise will help you decide if it is worth getting back together.

Even if you are part of the situation, you should try to analyze it as objectively as possible. Try to see the problem as if it belonged to someone else, assume your own mistakes and theirs. This will help you give more clarity to your questions.

You may discover that the relationship was not as good as you thought and perhaps it is not worth continuing to try. Or, you may notice that their problems had a solution. If so, dry your tears and get to work to achieve that reconciliation.

Also read our guide on how to solve relationship problems step by step

2. Experience your pain and then get over it

Feeling bad is an inevitable part of every breakup. You will have a stage of incomprehension, then you will have anger, because it will be difficult for you to accept that love was not enough to be happy. The important thing is that you do not anchor yourself in spite.

You don’t want everyone to talk about you as “the girl who’s still crying about her ex who left her ten years ago.”

If your intention is to get him back, the victim attitude and crying are definitely not going to help you. This idea that “if it wasn’t him, it won’t be anyone else” or that “no one else will love you” is absurd and will make him and any other suitor flee. Nothing is less attractive than desperation.

Breakups hurt! But instead of crying, it is more productive to look for solutions to your problems.

3. Evaluate if it is possible to recover it

Trust your own intuition. After analyzing the situation, and regardless of the external opinions you receive, listen to your mind and your heart. They will tell you if you are able to reconcile and get back with him or if you prefer to keep the breakup without trying.

Can you live with the idea of ​​not having moved a muscle to try to reconcile? Will it be worth winning him back after he left you? Only you know how you feel about it and only you can decide.

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4. Change all your strategies

After analyzing the breakup, look back at your memories and the development of your relationship. If they already had certain problems that motivated them to distance themselves, she examines in depth the reasons for those conflicts and defines what their causes were.

One way to start is to remember what the language they used was like when they spoke to each other. Were they hostile? Too sweet? Did you treat him like he was a baby?

On the other hand, define if you were pursuing him, if perhaps you were one of those women who couldn’t breathe because they wanted to know every step he took.

Many times it is those small everyday things that make a couple bitter. It is important to identify these daily problems and find a balance between the two to correct them.

After this, it is important that you point out which behaviors you need to improve and work to change them. This must start from yourself, because the change begins with your own attitude.

5. Self-understanding is vital

To what extent did you stop being yourself when you were together? Were you happy? Did he provide you with emotional security? Did he respect you? When relationships are very long-lasting, one’s identity is often diluted between the tastes and desires of the partner.

Instead of letting sadness dominate you, take this time of separation to reconnect with yourself and regain your personality. How long has it been since you went out alone with your friends? Being single can also be very fun and flattering, allow yourself to experience it again for yourself.

There are relationships in which women completely cede control to their peers, making it more difficult to move on after the breakup. One of my cousins ​​had been married for so long that even she forgot what it was like to go shopping alone, without her husband choosing what they were going to buy.

Remember that you are an individual and you should be able to find happiness for yourself. What has happened is a valuable opportunity to refocus your emotions and evaluate how much you have abandoned yourself as a woman.

It is from that perspective of independence that you should base any attempt at reconciliation.

Also read our guide on 9 ways to find inner peace and tranquility in difficult times

6. Put yourself in their place

If you have mutually decided that you will give each other another chance, your boyfriend should be sure that things will go as agreed.

That is why it is not enough to complain and tell him all your complaints about the relationship, you must also listen to what he feels and understand it.

He too has had his problems with the relationship and the only way to reach agreements is to be honest and allow each person to express themselves openly. Put everything on the scale, will you be able to forgive each other and understand each other better?

Sincere communication is the key to correcting problems.

7. Communication is essential

How to be assertive when you want to get back with your ex? Well, communicating with him. There is no other way.

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A relationship is two. If only you want to come back, but he shows no interest in seeing you and talking again, the best thing you can do is move on with your life and forget about him.

But if you agreed to meet, it is good that you review in your mind what you want to say and focus on solving the situation you are in. Don’t let emotions interfere with what you want to say in that meeting.

8. Remember that reconciliations are not easy

Many couples who have decided to try again break up again after a few months because they cannot find a way to avoid the same problems that led to the first breakup.

If the conditions of reconciliation are not clear and there are no real changes, the problems that already affected them will continue to be present in the couple. The same goes for the doubts, fears, mistrust and resentment they may have felt while they were apart.

It also depends on your problems. If you decided to break up because he was womanizing, insensitive, or aggressive, you need to understand that those problems won’t go away overnight. If he left you for someone else and comes back, his regret may not be enough to overcome the situation.

People don’t change completely. If a man is careless and unfaithful, it is very unlikely that those characteristics will change in a short time. It is also not worth it to be with someone you want to change, it is exhausting and, in most cases, disappointing.

The only way for reconciliation to occur is for both of them to forgive each other and really make changes in their lives to alter the dynamic of their relationship, which led them to failure.

9. Don’t get carried away by what others say

Even if they are your true friends or family, other people’s advice should not be what guides you when deciding about your relationship. It can be a support, but it must be your feelings and instincts that prevail, because you are the one who must live with your decision.

It is normal for you to seek support and advice, it is good in many cases to see the situation more clearly, with greater objectivity. But don’t let anyone make decisions for you.

It is also important that you know who to look for that support. Trust your true friends, those who are truly honest, who will point out your own mistakes and, above all, who will continue to support you and respect the decision you make.

Stay away from those people who act like your friends but are happy about your misfortunes, or from those who, instead of helping you solve them, focus on showing you even more problems and sadness.

Better wait until the anger and pain goes away. With a cool head you can decide for yourself what you prefer to do.

10. Don’t beg!

If there is any indicator of desperation, it is begging. Your boy will never want to return to your side if he notices that you are begging him because you need to be with him. And if he does it, it will be for the wrong reasons. He won’t do it because he loves you, but because he felt sorry for you.

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No need to humble yourself! If he loves you, he himself will try to find you and will do his best to get back to you.

If you humiliate and despise yourself, no one will value you.

Also read our guide on 18 things women think men like, but actually hate

11. Ignore him a little

No one knows what He has, until He loses it. You may be terrified at the thought of walking away, because you think you will only miss opportunities to reconcile.

But just think for a moment: What happens when he doesn’t write to you or speak to you for several days? You get desperate. You automatically believe that he has stopped loving you, you can’t wait to see him again and find out what happened to make him walk away.

Exactly the same thing will happen to him if you ignore him a little!

Make the firm decision not to check their social networks and dedicate yourself to yourself and your life for at least 30 days. Surely he will not endure even half of that period to appear again and look for you. The idea that you didn’t care to finish will undoubtedly irritate him and cause him to have doubts.

Men like to think that they are indispensable in our lives, so making them see that they are not always a priority is giving them a spoonful of their own syrup. If his friends also see that you are dating, independent, and enjoying being single, he won’t be able to help but want to come back.

12. Treat him well

In the worst case scenario, assuming you break up but live together and he hasn’t moved out of the house, you can ignore him and show that your life has moved on without being rude or humiliating to him.

How to do it? Treat him the opposite way he expects you to. Be nice, respectful, but make your life independent. Laugh when you talk to your friends on the phone, go out without telling them, and maintain an active social life.

Surely he will be intrigued by these new outings and will want to know what you are up to. As long as he sees that you are still desirable company to other people, he will wonder if it was a good idea to break up with you.

In conclusion

Getting back with an ex is worth it only if you both want it and are willing to put in the work to overcome the issues that led to your first breakup.

You should start with yourself and your attitude, because sometimes we don’t realize how annoying or quarrelsome we can be for our partners. If you are used to getting involved in small things, the couple wears out because…

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